A review by hayam
White Nights by Fyodor Dostoevsky

5.0

“how have you lived if there’s no story” ~

Well, this is my first encounter with dostoyevsky, and let’s just say im… feeling lots of feelings.

You see a story about two people who connect one day over a bridge and form a relationship and you think, hmm sounds intriguing; but… you get to the last page and hear the slow sound of your heart shattering into tiny little pieces.

First of all, this story is so so much more than an exploration of unrequited love. It’s about life, and when i say “life” i mean our existence as a whole. And what is existence if not a huge web of contradictions.

Solitude vs company, reality vs dreams, passiveness vs activeness. These are all forces which haunt the mc as he navigates the big question of “is it better to have lived and experienced the pain of living, or is it better to exist alone in the safety of our own minds.”

It’s a simple question, but with oh such a complicated answer. One which i felt dostoyevsky was not answering, simply because there isn’t a definitive answer.

For the mc, the joy of getting to know and loving Nastenka takes him out of a revine, and he sees his reality for what it is. He is alone and afraid of loneliness. In Nastenka, he is able to see life in a new color and hope is around every corner of the pages. However, Nastenka was never his to begin with, and with her loss he reverts back to his old existence, except this time having experienced the joy of life, even if for just a minute.

~ “A whole minute of bliss! Is that really so little for the whole of a man’s life” ~

We are left to wonder, is this minute truly worth his now new harsh reality? Are any of our minutes of bliss and action worth the years after where we crave to feel that bliss again once it’s gone? by the end of this story, i was definitely edging it towards the existential “to be or not to be” territory (my favorite existential girlie trope!)

truly a story to be cherished. <3