A review by christine_d
Patricia Wants to Cuddle by Samantha Allen

dark mysterious fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Plot
  • Strong character development? No
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? No

3.0

the positives:
this is a quick, snappy read with an engaging writing style that is easy to read. i zipped through it in one night and it really gripped me. the horror elements, shall we say, really had me tense. i particularly liked the concept of these “airheaded” dating reality show contestants behind the scenes, and the conversations that both they and the producers/filmmakers had on the side too.
right from the start, the way renee describes amanda had me wondering if something more would happen there. and i was surprised how much i became invested in mike and casey’s situationship.
i also really enjoyed the media elements of the book - blog posts, forum threads, etc., which made reading this book almost feel like reading a documentary - between the rotating perspectives, the plot revolving around reality tv, the mystery/suspense element, etc. in general i’d say this book has good bones - characters that i could become invested in, good writing style, dry and witty humor, and an interesting plot concept.

the negatives:
for me, this book missed in a couple of key ways. for one, it does feel quite short to read, and over the course of the book, i don’t have any true feeling of any of the characters developing in any material sense, or finding a satisfying plot resolution. i was interested in all of the main characters - both the contestants, producers, and jeremy - and wanted to better understand their motivations, but they fall a bit flat. 

renee is supposed to be our main protagonist, it seems, but she is essentially written as emotionally numb for 90% of the book, before pivoting to a semi-delusional worship for lady sasquatch. not that i’m opposed to emotionally numb characters, but why did she feel and act the way she did? why did she agree to go on the show in the first place if she finds it so worthless and tokenizing? it feels like the only thing i knew about her was that she is black and an english major, and bisexual. but who is she?? the fact that she is so tight lipped throughout the story plus her emotionally numb narration make it hard to discern her true motivations and feelings aside from just generally despising the reality show. 

i wish that there was a bit more development of the characters - i would have liked to see how the spat between casey and matt played out. i originally thought the book would end with renee and one of the contestants falling in love and running away to the palm springs resort. 

i also would have really liked to see the aftermath of amanda and renee’s kiss. that felt like such a promising moment, especially with jeremy attacking renee about it afterwards. then the horror of renee finding amanda’s body diverts the plot back to sasquatch. 

and in some of the final scenes, i was baffled by renee not just refusing to attack sasquatch, but directing sasquatch to kill jeremy? i know she thought he was a stupid fuck (and he was), but he died gruesomely and she did not react at all.


final thoughts:
it’s a quick, “fun”, gripping read about The Bachelor if it was even sleazier, but there were a lot of unresolved plot points that left me a bit baffled and wrong-footed by the end. the final leg of the book is frankly a bit bizarre. while i do like the concept of
Ms. Sasquatch and her team of loyal lesbian guardians
, i think i would have enjoyed this book more if any of the arguments, relationships, or character tensions were resolved satisfyingly by the end of the book. 
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