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ashleyg101 's review for:
The Whispering Room
by Dean Koontz
Shoutout to netgalley for the ARC.
OK, I think all of the images below are from the second book, but I can't be sure because they blur together. Why do they blur together? BECAUSE IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ONE BOOK. I mean, the technological impossibilities aside, the super hot omg we need to talk about it every three minutes doesn't she look like a model protagonist aside, and the literal absurdity of her quest aside, the plot is too slow. For years, my sister and I have said that Dean Koontz has this drive that forces him to use larger words than necessary, and to add these superfluous descriptions in order to make himself look smart. With this trilogy, it seems to be filler. I believe the second book came out less than a year after the first, so obviously, he knows where it's going. I feel badly for readers of Dean Koontz, like myself. Did you ever read Watchers? Or Phantoms? Or Night Chills? They're great. They're scary and have actual plots and good and evil and they're just nice books. But the stuff he comes out with now...I don't know. It feels hollow. It's like James Patterson, churning out two new books a month. Why not turn the Jane Hawk trilogy into one, hard-hitting book? Because we need to describe the gd sky 400 times. I cannot tell you how many times he described the sky in detail with its gray clouds and possibility of rain. WE GET IT. RAIN IS COMING. IT WAS COMING 10 CHAPTERS AGO. Which is another point of contention with me - the chapters are each about 5 pages long. Unnecessary. As happy as I am to have a kick-ass female protagonist, I'm disappointed that she absolutely has to be 1. super hot (she's compared to a runway model, a Vogue model, etc. over and over and over throughout the books. She also eats like there's no tomorrow but is super thin and hot. At one point, she unbuttons a button on her blouse before talking to a couple of teenage boys, not because she hopes it will distract them, but because, you know, maybe it will or maybe it will help her in some way to show off her tits. Gross.) and 2. she's superhuman. There's no way anyone could pull this off. She should be dead about 4000 times. I get it, she's FBI, but she's also incredibly young (27 or 28) so she's barely out of FBI training, and yet can go up against the most amazing criminals in the world and work through these incredibly detailed plans to bring down half the world. Ugh. I mean, the story itself is fairly absurd but I am learning how horribly it is to live in this time period and use technology because literally, no one is safe and we're all going to die. Below are some pictures that illustrate my raw anger at Mr. Koontz.
OK, I think all of the images below are from the second book, but I can't be sure because they blur together. Why do they blur together? BECAUSE IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ONE BOOK. I mean, the technological impossibilities aside, the super hot omg we need to talk about it every three minutes doesn't she look like a model protagonist aside, and the literal absurdity of her quest aside, the plot is too slow. For years, my sister and I have said that Dean Koontz has this drive that forces him to use larger words than necessary, and to add these superfluous descriptions in order to make himself look smart. With this trilogy, it seems to be filler. I believe the second book came out less than a year after the first, so obviously, he knows where it's going. I feel badly for readers of Dean Koontz, like myself. Did you ever read Watchers? Or Phantoms? Or Night Chills? They're great. They're scary and have actual plots and good and evil and they're just nice books. But the stuff he comes out with now...I don't know. It feels hollow. It's like James Patterson, churning out two new books a month. Why not turn the Jane Hawk trilogy into one, hard-hitting book? Because we need to describe the gd sky 400 times. I cannot tell you how many times he described the sky in detail with its gray clouds and possibility of rain. WE GET IT. RAIN IS COMING. IT WAS COMING 10 CHAPTERS AGO. Which is another point of contention with me - the chapters are each about 5 pages long. Unnecessary. As happy as I am to have a kick-ass female protagonist, I'm disappointed that she absolutely has to be 1. super hot (she's compared to a runway model, a Vogue model, etc. over and over and over throughout the books. She also eats like there's no tomorrow but is super thin and hot. At one point, she unbuttons a button on her blouse before talking to a couple of teenage boys, not because she hopes it will distract them, but because, you know, maybe it will or maybe it will help her in some way to show off her tits. Gross.) and 2. she's superhuman. There's no way anyone could pull this off. She should be dead about 4000 times. I get it, she's FBI, but she's also incredibly young (27 or 28) so she's barely out of FBI training, and yet can go up against the most amazing criminals in the world and work through these incredibly detailed plans to bring down half the world. Ugh. I mean, the story itself is fairly absurd but I am learning how horribly it is to live in this time period and use technology because literally, no one is safe and we're all going to die. Below are some pictures that illustrate my raw anger at Mr. Koontz.