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A review by amandakitz
The Dark Between Stars by Atticus
3.0
I remembered liking a book of his I read years ago and was excited to pick up this one, but I found it quite depressing for reasons I'm not sure the author intended. I think this time approaching it having been single for a while and therefore not as starry-eyed, as well as processing new diagnoses of autism and ADHD, gave me a different perspective than before.
I can see it in "Love Her Wild" as well, this theme of the manic pixie dream girl that was exciting to fall in love with because she saw the world differently and turns out the relationship wasn't good for either of them. Toward the end, it very much illustrated how those of us with neurodivergence and therefore a creative and unique inner world are exciting to fall in love with and then the reality of the depression, anxiety, executive dysfunction, etc that comes with being neurodivergent in a neurotypical world becomes too much for the people who enjoyed the novelty of our minds in the beginning. I didn't feel the warm swell of falling in love and the heartbreak of a good thing ending; I felt devastation seeing that pattern reflected on paper, of that manic pixie dream girl easy to fall in love with and abandoned when the reality of neurodivergence and mental illness sets in.
I think ending the book with clear illustrations of the suffering involved was a good choice; if you are going to fall in love with someone's chaotic beauty and unbridled joy, you need to be ready to love them in their grief, their pain, their loneliness, their anxiety, their suffering. You need to be there as much to give kindness, love, and support as you are there to receive their love and joy and beauty.
Perhaps read with that interpretation it would be enlightening to some folks who have seen that pattern in their own lives and relationships but can't put their finger on it, but I don't think that was the intention. There were some lovely moments and lovely lines but most of it was a depressing illustration of the ways folks fall in and out of love with "crazy" "wild" folks like us.
So with this lens, I would recommend it, but without that lens or any critical perspective, I'm afraid it would only serve to fetishize neurodivergence and mental illness further and cause more damage as folks repeat this pattern.
I can see it in "Love Her Wild" as well, this theme of the manic pixie dream girl that was exciting to fall in love with because she saw the world differently and turns out the relationship wasn't good for either of them. Toward the end, it very much illustrated how those of us with neurodivergence and therefore a creative and unique inner world are exciting to fall in love with and then the reality of the depression, anxiety, executive dysfunction, etc that comes with being neurodivergent in a neurotypical world becomes too much for the people who enjoyed the novelty of our minds in the beginning. I didn't feel the warm swell of falling in love and the heartbreak of a good thing ending; I felt devastation seeing that pattern reflected on paper, of that manic pixie dream girl easy to fall in love with and abandoned when the reality of neurodivergence and mental illness sets in.
I think ending the book with clear illustrations of the suffering involved was a good choice; if you are going to fall in love with someone's chaotic beauty and unbridled joy, you need to be ready to love them in their grief, their pain, their loneliness, their anxiety, their suffering. You need to be there as much to give kindness, love, and support as you are there to receive their love and joy and beauty.
Perhaps read with that interpretation it would be enlightening to some folks who have seen that pattern in their own lives and relationships but can't put their finger on it, but I don't think that was the intention. There were some lovely moments and lovely lines but most of it was a depressing illustration of the ways folks fall in and out of love with "crazy" "wild" folks like us.
So with this lens, I would recommend it, but without that lens or any critical perspective, I'm afraid it would only serve to fetishize neurodivergence and mental illness further and cause more damage as folks repeat this pattern.