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iymain 's review for:
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change
by Stephen R. Covey, Jim Collins
I suspect that the whole "Everything I Need to Know, I Learned in Kindergarted" thing is a response to this book. And, from what I've seen of the "Everything I Need to Know" book, it was a lot more fun to read than this one.
I found Covey's descriptions of his tearful, sincere, soulful interactions with other people to be just plain annoying. His "Aha!" moments came off as fabricated, too. And, MAN, can this guy belabor a point!
But there is something to be gained from belaboring a point that's worthwhile. It's kind of like focusing on something so hard that you really think about it, or your brain shuts down and you are able to think about it on a deeper level. (Kind of an "Om" thing.) I mean, we all know we should listen to each other, but after a really long chapter about it, I found that I was really thinking about listening to people around me and for a moment there, it made me a better listener.
I had a weird, "Man, this stuff works!" episode when I experimentally tried the "reflective" listening with my son that Covey describes. When I repeated back to him, "You're saying you hate Spanish." He opened up and told me things about Spanish he'd never said before: how some kids were already bilingual and other kids just asked them how to say stuff, how some kids just use Google Translate and finish their projects faster and know that they'r saying what they want to say, how he just can't say anything in Spanish... It dawned on me that he doesn't hate Spanish, he hates not being able to speak Spanish. And that's good news. Here I was doing the win/lose thing and listening while thinking of what I wanted to say in the past so our conversations always devolved into, "Spanish is important. You need to learn it. You'll be glad you did when you're older! I love Spanish! I wish I could speak it better..." Yep, even going autobiographical on the kid. So I learned something from Covey. A practical skill that has already paid off. That alone made this book worth reading.
I also found the time management part worthwhile. He gets a little silly with his "Generations" of time management philosophy, but I have tried his (also annoying) 4 quadrant thing and avoiding busy-ness of 3rd generation time usage and it's also been beneficial. Bottom line, we should not spend out lives reacting to everything, we should choose our activities as things we find to be important. That's not rocket science. But breaking it down into a non-emotive thing makes it easier to implement. I have found myself looking at exercise as good for me and not urgent b/c I haven't done it (and don't want to do it). Is it news that exercise is "my time"? No. But after reading a chapter about it, it sunk in on a deeper level and I just feel differently about it. I believe it now, I guess.
So while I think this book is a little bugging, and borderline condescending, the fact is that these obvious principles are things that have fallen to the wayside with me. Spending a few days in forced thinking about them mode, I realized that I really should make more of an effort to be--not effective, exactly, but--proactive (agh! Sorry for the Covey-ism) about my life. Maybe "conscious" about my life? I dunno. But to pay attention and make real choices instead of letting the days just go by. And I guess that's proactive. Again, the bald guy has a point.
I found Covey's descriptions of his tearful, sincere, soulful interactions with other people to be just plain annoying. His "Aha!" moments came off as fabricated, too. And, MAN, can this guy belabor a point!
But there is something to be gained from belaboring a point that's worthwhile. It's kind of like focusing on something so hard that you really think about it, or your brain shuts down and you are able to think about it on a deeper level. (Kind of an "Om" thing.) I mean, we all know we should listen to each other, but after a really long chapter about it, I found that I was really thinking about listening to people around me and for a moment there, it made me a better listener.
I had a weird, "Man, this stuff works!" episode when I experimentally tried the "reflective" listening with my son that Covey describes. When I repeated back to him, "You're saying you hate Spanish." He opened up and told me things about Spanish he'd never said before: how some kids were already bilingual and other kids just asked them how to say stuff, how some kids just use Google Translate and finish their projects faster and know that they'r saying what they want to say, how he just can't say anything in Spanish... It dawned on me that he doesn't hate Spanish, he hates not being able to speak Spanish. And that's good news. Here I was doing the win/lose thing and listening while thinking of what I wanted to say in the past so our conversations always devolved into, "Spanish is important. You need to learn it. You'll be glad you did when you're older! I love Spanish! I wish I could speak it better..." Yep, even going autobiographical on the kid. So I learned something from Covey. A practical skill that has already paid off. That alone made this book worth reading.
I also found the time management part worthwhile. He gets a little silly with his "Generations" of time management philosophy, but I have tried his (also annoying) 4 quadrant thing and avoiding busy-ness of 3rd generation time usage and it's also been beneficial. Bottom line, we should not spend out lives reacting to everything, we should choose our activities as things we find to be important. That's not rocket science. But breaking it down into a non-emotive thing makes it easier to implement. I have found myself looking at exercise as good for me and not urgent b/c I haven't done it (and don't want to do it). Is it news that exercise is "my time"? No. But after reading a chapter about it, it sunk in on a deeper level and I just feel differently about it. I believe it now, I guess.
So while I think this book is a little bugging, and borderline condescending, the fact is that these obvious principles are things that have fallen to the wayside with me. Spending a few days in forced thinking about them mode, I realized that I really should make more of an effort to be--not effective, exactly, but--proactive (agh! Sorry for the Covey-ism) about my life. Maybe "conscious" about my life? I dunno. But to pay attention and make real choices instead of letting the days just go by. And I guess that's proactive. Again, the bald guy has a point.