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A review by utopiastateofmind
My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell
4.0
(Disclaimer: I received this book from the publisher. This has not impacted my review which is unbiased and honest.)
TW: grooming
Even days later, I'm not sure how to review My Dark Vanessa. It's a difficult book to read because I was split between empathizing, and relating, to Vanessa while also acknowledging her flaws and mistakes. This is very much Vanessa's story and her own narration. Her own journey full of mistakes we don't understand, excuses we make up for our own sake, and comments that simultaneously unsettle and confuse us. My Dark Vanessa tells the story of Vanessa, of her being groomed.
The recent allegations in 2017 by a former student of Strane causes Vanessa to re-visit her memories. Memories which, I'd argue, never left her. Which still very much live within her body, her self, and her present. The gestures and bodily habits that register without even realizing it. How it feels to be 'special' and how badly we, as teens, crave this feeling of being taken seriously and seen. Of how our society lives in this space of sexually objectifying girls and also rhetoric that puts the responsibility on them.
TW: grooming
Even days later, I'm not sure how to review My Dark Vanessa. It's a difficult book to read because I was split between empathizing, and relating, to Vanessa while also acknowledging her flaws and mistakes. This is very much Vanessa's story and her own narration. Her own journey full of mistakes we don't understand, excuses we make up for our own sake, and comments that simultaneously unsettle and confuse us. My Dark Vanessa tells the story of Vanessa, of her being groomed.
The recent allegations in 2017 by a former student of Strane causes Vanessa to re-visit her memories. Memories which, I'd argue, never left her. Which still very much live within her body, her self, and her present. The gestures and bodily habits that register without even realizing it. How it feels to be 'special' and how badly we, as teens, crave this feeling of being taken seriously and seen. Of how our society lives in this space of sexually objectifying girls and also rhetoric that puts the responsibility on them.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Pedophilia, Rape, and Gaslighting
Moderate: Sexism, Sexual assault, Suicidal thoughts, and Suicide