A review by balconyfalconry
Battlefield Earth: A Saga of the Year 3000 by L. Ron Hubbard

1.0

Ever wanted to read a 800+ page pulp novel mostly written in passive voice? A fair-to-middling action story exists in the first 250 pages, bolstered by a personal cat-and-mouse game between human slave and alien master. But Hubbard quickly concludes this narrative and pads it out with 550 more pages of everything you didn't ever feel the need to know about diplomacy and banking. Characters are introduced every few pages and Hubbard doesn't bother to color them beyond a name and some sort of stereotype. But that's okay, because no single character in the cast of thousands is as strong, smart, wise, handsome, ripped, clever, cool as Jonnie "Goodboy" Tyler. Yikes.