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caracalico 's review for:
I'm liberal, ace, and genderqueer, and there is a lot of stuff I did not agree with in this book. First of all, the way it's written is really only going to convince people who already are in this area of thought. Anyone who is approaching these ideas for the first time, especially if they come from a conservative mindset, are not going to be moved by anything she has to say and on the contrary be repelled by most of it due to the way she presents it, just like how a Pride Parade Recap on tv repels conservative viewers by focusing on fringe/shock value. Wrapping gender up with sex positivity is a mistake and it's better to separate the movements. One can be a "gender anarchist" without being a sex positivity activist or even believing in the free sex culture, but she doesn't give you that option as she writes the book just assuming you agree with all of it. She also spends a surprising amount of time promoting BDSM which seemed very unnecessary for a workbook about gender. I get that sex and gender are linked, but the focus was too much on sex in this book. I'm not trying to be anti-sex here or even anti-bdsm, people can do what they want if its consensual, I'm just saying that the author makes a mistake by assuming the reader is going to be on the same page as her with this, and will turn readers who don't agree with that aspect against the idea of looking past the gender binary by association.
She also tries to push this idea that if you are going to mess with gender, you better be fierce and fabulous about it, but why? It feels like it was written for drag queens/kings by a drag queen. For those of us who are introverted or just want to be ourselves and not call attention to our nonconformity as much as possible, that is annoying advice to be given and feels a bit clueless about the lowkey noncombative personalities of a great percentage of people who are gender nonconforming. It also alienates those with this kind of interoverted, quiet, unpolitical personality who are coming into this topic for the first time with thoughts of being genderqueer in mind, but read these sorts of books and watch the parades on tv and are convinced that they won't fit in with the people in the movement, and that is absolutely not true, as most of us are NOT like "fierce and fabulous", at least looking at the large number of lgbt people I personally know. Rather most of us are pretty much otherwise typical.
It's also a bit too cutesy with 'auntie' and 'honey' and etc. And there's a chunk of pointless judeo-christian god stuff near the end (that certainly is not there for the benefit of conservative readers, as they would be offended by her take on it, so I don't know who it's there for the benefit of).
Well anyway, there are other things I did not agree with but I won't get into them here. It wasn't the worst book, but I probably wouldn't bother recommending it to people who want to learn about gender variance. An internet or youtube vlog search would give them a more realistic look at the movement.
She also tries to push this idea that if you are going to mess with gender, you better be fierce and fabulous about it, but why? It feels like it was written for drag queens/kings by a drag queen. For those of us who are introverted or just want to be ourselves and not call attention to our nonconformity as much as possible, that is annoying advice to be given and feels a bit clueless about the lowkey noncombative personalities of a great percentage of people who are gender nonconforming. It also alienates those with this kind of interoverted, quiet, unpolitical personality who are coming into this topic for the first time with thoughts of being genderqueer in mind, but read these sorts of books and watch the parades on tv and are convinced that they won't fit in with the people in the movement, and that is absolutely not true, as most of us are NOT like "fierce and fabulous", at least looking at the large number of lgbt people I personally know. Rather most of us are pretty much otherwise typical.
It's also a bit too cutesy with 'auntie' and 'honey' and etc. And there's a chunk of pointless judeo-christian god stuff near the end (that certainly is not there for the benefit of conservative readers, as they would be offended by her take on it, so I don't know who it's there for the benefit of).
Well anyway, there are other things I did not agree with but I won't get into them here. It wasn't the worst book, but I probably wouldn't bother recommending it to people who want to learn about gender variance. An internet or youtube vlog search would give them a more realistic look at the movement.