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A review by mafiabadgers
Sandstorm by James Rollins
Did not finish book. Stopped at 18%.
First attempted 11/2024
I can't continue. I'm filled with too much rage. I wanted something light to read. Seeking to recapture the thrills of my youth, I turn to a lightweight globetrotting action-adventure with a fake history angle. An Indiana Jones knockoff. Very well. One of the protagonists turns out to be a wealthy British orphan whose parent(s) raised her to be good at everything and then died mysteriously, called Lady Kara Kensington, who is definitely not a Lady Lara Croft ripoff. Fine. The plot is something about antimatter that came to Earth inside meteorites, which is stupid, but so be it. There is also the lost city of Ubar (the City of a Thousand Pillars, the Atlantis of the sands etc.), which was the final location of the derivative yet enjoyable videogame Uncharted 3. The game postdates the book so I suppose I can't really blame Rollins for that. Lady Kensington's best friend is an Arabic woman she white-savioured out of the middle east, but exotic adventure novels are usually at least a little bit racist so I was braced for this. My point is that I've put up with a good deal of stupid stuff to make it this far.
And then Lady K. decides that they're going to need help from the best. That means her best friend's ex, she announces. "If we're going to succeed, we're going to need Indiana Jones." End of chapter. New chapter: a man is racing a speedboat through a flooded gorge in China, pursued by RPG-toting antiquities smugglers. His name? Omaha Dunn.
I'M FUCKING DUNN.
I can't continue. I'm filled with too much rage. I wanted something light to read. Seeking to recapture the thrills of my youth, I turn to a lightweight globetrotting action-adventure with a fake history angle. An Indiana Jones knockoff. Very well. One of the protagonists turns out to be a wealthy British orphan whose parent(s) raised her to be good at everything and then died mysteriously, called Lady Kara Kensington, who is definitely not a Lady Lara Croft ripoff. Fine. The plot is something about antimatter that came to Earth inside meteorites, which is stupid, but so be it. There is also the lost city of Ubar (the City of a Thousand Pillars, the Atlantis of the sands etc.), which was the final location of the derivative yet enjoyable videogame Uncharted 3. The game postdates the book so I suppose I can't really blame Rollins for that. Lady Kensington's best friend is an Arabic woman she white-savioured out of the middle east, but exotic adventure novels are usually at least a little bit racist so I was braced for this. My point is that I've put up with a good deal of stupid stuff to make it this far.
And then Lady K. decides that they're going to need help from the best. That means her best friend's ex, she announces. "If we're going to succeed, we're going to need Indiana Jones." End of chapter. New chapter: a man is racing a speedboat through a flooded gorge in China, pursued by RPG-toting antiquities smugglers. His name? Omaha Dunn.
I'M FUCKING DUNN.