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cheymathews 's review for:
My Name is Rapunzel
by K.C. Hilton, K.C. Hilton
DID NOT FINISH
I’ll be honest and say that I did not, could not, finish this book. It wasn’t because I was busy, but because I was bored out of my mind. First off there are pages and pages of her boring ass daily life that go like this:
“Solitaire became my companion, each move like a conversation. And the computer made easy work of writing in my journal. Something felt cold and sterile about composing personal thoughts into a machine rather than scrawling them out by hand. It was almost too easy, but at least my private ramblings were protected by a password. Besides, it certainly beat plunking away at that dreadful old typewriter.”
Not only is her daily life boring, but the interactions she has with other characters are very shallow and one-sided. The story follows the immortal life of Rapunzel. Rapunzel is 268 years old but she is eternally in the body of an 18 year old. Sounds pretty awesome, right? No, because Rapunzel spends all of that time mourning her dead fiance. This isn’t really a spoiler because it happens in the first few pages of the novel.
The romance is half baked at best. The author uses cliche lines to describe their love. A love that is very dependent of their mutual good looks. For example,
"But from that moment on, nothing would ever be the same."
The author tries to use forbidden love to sweeten their relationship, but it really falls flat because of lack of backing. Once Henry, Rapunzel’s love interest, dies, Rapunzel makes up a story about him to distance herself from his suspicious death. What she ends up doing is ruining Henry’s good reputation by making him appear flakey and like a womanizer. Not only does she let Henry die, she also kills his good reputation. For the next two hundred years, Rapunzel cries over Henry.
"Time was supposed to be the healer of all pain. I used to believe that. I’d waited for that to prove true in my life. But I no longer believed. After waking like this, to a drenched pillow, each morning for nigh unto three centuries, it still felt as though it happened only yesterday. Hope did fail for entire lifetimes…for many, many lifetimes.”
There are entire pages filled with her sadness at his death… over two hundred years after he dies. Even when she outlives her parents she spends more time crying over Henry then her mother and father.
“But, the silent mirror was honest. Even though I looked just like her on the outside, I wasn't the giddy girl I was on the day of my first…and last…kiss.
If I was going to live forever, I would have some fun. I would travel the world, learn many languages, save lives. ANYTHING AT ALL. But Rapunzel just sits around in her tower and washes her hair. Year after year. In fact the first interesting thing Rapunzel does is respond to an article in the newspaper that said fairy tales were not reality.
“Let me just say, fairy tales are not real. They don't exist. It's that simple. I hope I don’t burst your bubbles by pointing this out. While I'm on the subject, might I also remind you, dear readers, that neither Santa Clause nor the Tooth Fairy exist either. I'm simply trying to keep things real here, folks. Just because your neighbor claims to have found true love or someone wins the lottery doesn't make it a fairy tale. A wish or a dream-come-true doesn't count as being a fairy tale.”
Rapunzel becomes very angry at this passage and author even though this assumption is the very thing that enables her to live without persecution. She is so angered by this article that she writes him the true story. She hates the fact that there are other versions of her life out there but if I wrote fairy tales I would write a very different one then her life because Rapunzel’s life (in this novel) was so boring. But as the reader I got the pleasure of hearing her story twice! We hear it first when the author introduces the novel and secondly when she responds to the newspaper writer. Because of this double retelling, the author was purposely very vague in her first go around of the Rapunzel narrative.
The romance was stifled at best. The author misses a great opportunity to tell us how Henry and Rapunzel met and fell in love. Instead she relies on their good looks to sell their romance. Even the lovey dovey foreshadowing was shallow.
“A happy life is having you as my wife. If I die today, I'll die a happy man.”
Of course, he dies soon after he says this so…
“Solitaire became my companion, each move like a conversation. And the computer made easy work of writing in my journal. Something felt cold and sterile about composing personal thoughts into a machine rather than scrawling them out by hand. It was almost too easy, but at least my private ramblings were protected by a password. Besides, it certainly beat plunking away at that dreadful old typewriter.”
Not only is her daily life boring, but the interactions she has with other characters are very shallow and one-sided. The story follows the immortal life of Rapunzel. Rapunzel is 268 years old but she is eternally in the body of an 18 year old. Sounds pretty awesome, right? No, because Rapunzel spends all of that time mourning her dead fiance. This isn’t really a spoiler because it happens in the first few pages of the novel.
The romance is half baked at best. The author uses cliche lines to describe their love. A love that is very dependent of their mutual good looks. For example,
"But from that moment on, nothing would ever be the same."
The author tries to use forbidden love to sweeten their relationship, but it really falls flat because of lack of backing. Once Henry, Rapunzel’s love interest, dies, Rapunzel makes up a story about him to distance herself from his suspicious death. What she ends up doing is ruining Henry’s good reputation by making him appear flakey and like a womanizer. Not only does she let Henry die, she also kills his good reputation. For the next two hundred years, Rapunzel cries over Henry.
"Time was supposed to be the healer of all pain. I used to believe that. I’d waited for that to prove true in my life. But I no longer believed. After waking like this, to a drenched pillow, each morning for nigh unto three centuries, it still felt as though it happened only yesterday. Hope did fail for entire lifetimes…for many, many lifetimes.”
There are entire pages filled with her sadness at his death… over two hundred years after he dies. Even when she outlives her parents she spends more time crying over Henry then her mother and father.
“But, the silent mirror was honest. Even though I looked just like her on the outside, I wasn't the giddy girl I was on the day of my first…and last…kiss.
If I was going to live forever, I would have some fun. I would travel the world, learn many languages, save lives. ANYTHING AT ALL. But Rapunzel just sits around in her tower and washes her hair. Year after year. In fact the first interesting thing Rapunzel does is respond to an article in the newspaper that said fairy tales were not reality.
“Let me just say, fairy tales are not real. They don't exist. It's that simple. I hope I don’t burst your bubbles by pointing this out. While I'm on the subject, might I also remind you, dear readers, that neither Santa Clause nor the Tooth Fairy exist either. I'm simply trying to keep things real here, folks. Just because your neighbor claims to have found true love or someone wins the lottery doesn't make it a fairy tale. A wish or a dream-come-true doesn't count as being a fairy tale.”
Rapunzel becomes very angry at this passage and author even though this assumption is the very thing that enables her to live without persecution. She is so angered by this article that she writes him the true story. She hates the fact that there are other versions of her life out there but if I wrote fairy tales I would write a very different one then her life because Rapunzel’s life (in this novel) was so boring. But as the reader I got the pleasure of hearing her story twice! We hear it first when the author introduces the novel and secondly when she responds to the newspaper writer. Because of this double retelling, the author was purposely very vague in her first go around of the Rapunzel narrative.
The romance was stifled at best. The author misses a great opportunity to tell us how Henry and Rapunzel met and fell in love. Instead she relies on their good looks to sell their romance. Even the lovey dovey foreshadowing was shallow.
“A happy life is having you as my wife. If I die today, I'll die a happy man.”
Of course, he dies soon after he says this so…