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everlorian 's review for:
Temptation
by Ivy Smoak
DNF. did not COULD not finish. I started off loving it but then the writing just started to annoy me. It’s too stunted and short.
EXAMPLE:
We got in the elevator. We rode to the penthouse. We got off and I looked around.
Horrible. And the fact that the MC could neverrrr call him by his name but even in her inner monologue always referred to him as Professor Hunter. ALWAYS.
EXAMPLEEEEE:
Professor Hunter looked at me. I looked back at him. Professor Hunter had the best smile.
UH-NNOYING. I thought I could ride it out because I got about 60% through but I just couldn’t. Once I noticed those things ugh no.
EXAMPLE:
We got in the elevator. We rode to the penthouse. We got off and I looked around.
Horrible. And the fact that the MC could neverrrr call him by his name but even in her inner monologue always referred to him as Professor Hunter. ALWAYS.
EXAMPLEEEEE:
Professor Hunter looked at me. I looked back at him. Professor Hunter had the best smile.
UH-NNOYING. I thought I could ride it out because I got about 60% through but I just couldn’t. Once I noticed those things ugh no.