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bethanymyers 's review for:
No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline Without Shame
by Janet Lansbury
This approach really resonates with me, and I try to take these lessons to heart. I am seeing a lot of reviews here accusing Lansbury of “parent blaming.” Apparently those reviewers don’t agree with the title of the book - they must think some kids just really are bad, if their behavior is too much to expect their parents to handle. Or they think that’s it’s unfair to ask parents to deal with their own emotional and psychological baggage. IMO if you are bringing a little person into existence, who had zero say in the matter, it is part of your responsibility as a parent to work on your own issues to the best of your ability. So no, I don’t think this is parent blaming - it’s a matter of fact statement that to be the best parent you can be, you have to deal with any mental baggage that might prevent you from effectively dealing with normal toddler behavior like tantrums, picky eating, defiance, etc.
Anyway, to get to the point of this book, it’s basically these things:
-Respectful communication (direct and clear statements in first person language)
-Setting limits early (“I won’t let you”)
-Following through on the limit
-Acknowledging feelings (all feelings are allowed and supported. But not all behaviors!)
Anyway, to get to the point of this book, it’s basically these things:
-Respectful communication (direct and clear statements in first person language)
-Setting limits early (“I won’t let you”)
-Following through on the limit
-Acknowledging feelings (all feelings are allowed and supported. But not all behaviors!)