A review by aruarian_melody
Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young

dark emotional informative reflective

Mixed feelings about this one. The author's life story absolutely offers new perspectives and it was extremely brave to share. That being said - the second half is more about army life and the part about how/why she left felt more like a rant about a perceived injustice.

Obviously, I don't know what exactly went down but some things just felt off. She kept saying how she understands how some fellow SA victims might share their story in phases, while completely dismissing the possibility of this happening in the case she was involved with. She also didn't reflect on how a conversation can naturally lead to misunderstandings and different perceptions of a situation (especially for someone under immense stress). I just wish there was more nuance apart from "everyone had it out for me". I find it difficult to believe anyone who says "Thinking I could be sexist/toxic is ridiculous" without an ounce of self-reflection (talking purely about the situation that lead to her dismissal from the army - not questioning her life experiences in general).

I decided to not rate this book. The first half was still very valuable (and hard to get through) but I would have preferred more focus on the (skipped over) transition from leaving the cult to becoming part of "the system". Apart from some very few references to how the army and the cult were similar, the stories seemed disconnected and I kept wondering how she kept saying she knew the army was kind of like a cult but also (apparently) had no trouble with staying. A couple of things also felt borderline racist and homophobic. As a non-American, the level of patriotism felt very weird - but you probably have to feel that way to be part of the US army.