A review by lisabage
The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters by Priya Parker

informative medium-paced

4.0

A very good definitive work on what it means to bring people together and how to create a meaningful and memorable experience. Something to reread anytime you are planning a large event. 
  1. Have a reason to meet
  2. Make it a closed and safe space for your guests
  3. Don’t be afraid to take the reins and create the experience. 
  4. Make the closed space a fun temporary world
  5. Never start or end with logistics
  6. End as purposefully as you began. 

Quotes:
  • A good gathering purpose should also be disputable. 
  • A disputable purpose begins to be a decision filter. 
  • Ex: a wedding is a celebration of love but that’s not disputable. Is it a way to repay your parents and end your life with them, or a way to celebrate a new pairing and start a new tribe. That will help distinguish who gets the last seat. 
  • She invited her guests to serve each other and not worry about being served themselves. 
  • She plays the Egyptian when warmth is required and the German when greater order is required. 
  • Because so much gathering advice comes from exporters in food and decor rather than from facilitators, that advice almost invariably focuses on preparing things instead of preparing people. 
  • A gathering starts from the moment a guest learns of its existence. 
  • The bigger the ask, the more care, attention, and detail should be put into the pregame phase. 
  • Ex: creative way to introduce people to each other - guests send two photos and he decorated  the Christmas tree with the photos
  • Note: make sure you close, don’t just end. Look inward - what has this experience meant to me, and outward - what do I want to take from this temporary world back to the real world. If you have to do logistics, make them before the close.