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A review by lilybear3
Ace: What Asexuality Reveals about Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex by Angela Chen
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
I was super excited to pick this book up, it had been recommended by a co-worker and the topic interested me as I hadn't had a lot of prior knowledge about asexuality before. I knew asexuality and a few related terms, like aromantic and demisexual, but not beyond a surface level understanding. I felt that I learned a lot from this book and the stories people shared in it. Again, one of the reasons why I read this book was to learn about perspectives outside of my own.
This book has a lot to offer, even for people who don't identify as ace, like me. There were parts of this book where I found "a-ha" moments in my own journey in understanding my sexuality. There's a sense of relief in discovering that you're not alone and that there's a word or definition for what you are feeling, Chen writes, "the specificity of language can force us to look more closely at what we want and what leaves us cold" (29). There was a time in my life where sex was difficult and it has caused me to have a complicated relationship with sex. My interpretation of the following paragraph was super validating and I got emotional just reading it (it's long so I'll put it in spoiler brackets) "you don't have to be a part of the ace community forever, but the lesson that a happy life for aces is possible, regardless of origin, is one that is important and one that includes you too. It's for you even if you don't identify as ace. If asexuality is fine, so is every other form of low sexual desire or so-called sexual dysfunction. Anyone who has any form of desire or attraction lower or higher than 'normal' can still be okay. Better than okay." (102) .
This book has a lot to offer, even for people who don't identify as ace, like me. There were parts of this book where I found "a-ha" moments in my own journey in understanding my sexuality. There's a sense of relief in discovering that you're not alone and that there's a word or definition for what you are feeling, Chen writes, "the specificity of language can force us to look more closely at what we want and what leaves us cold" (29). There was a time in my life where sex was difficult and it has caused me to have a complicated relationship with sex. My interpretation of the following paragraph was super validating and I got emotional just reading it (it's long so I'll put it in spoiler brackets)
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual content and Acephobia/Arophobia
Moderate: Rape, Sexism, and Racism