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A review by kevin_shepherd
I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy
4.0
I have this weird affinity for biographies, autobiographies and memoirs. There are almost three hundred of them (290) shelved in various places throughout my home, including ten on Charles Darwin, four on George Orwell, three on Sylvia Plath, and two each on Kurt Vonnegut, Malcolm X, Richard Dawkins, and Christopher Hitchens.
All that being what it is, I can’t recall a single auto-bio that captivated me as much as Jennette McCurdy’s has. I went from ‘no-idea-who-she-is’ to suffering through episodes of iCarly, Sam & Cat, and Between just to better acquaint myself with her career (and for the record, McC can act circles around Ariana Grande—just sayin’).
I will never again look at child actors, stage moms, or Nickelodeon the same way.
____________________________________
“I poop and Mom gets a paper towel with water. I’m embarrassed she still insists on wiping my butt. I tried to tell her recently that now that I’m eight, I think I can handle it, but she looked like she was gonna cry and said she needs to do it until I’m at least ten because she doesn’t want skid marks on my Pocahontas underwear …Wipe. Wipe. Wipe.”
“…Manager #1 repeats, “They’re giving you three hundred thousand dollars and the only thing they want you to do is never talk about your experience at Nickelodeon.” …What the f*ck? Nickelodeon is offering me three hundred thousand dollars in hush money to not talk publicly about my experience on the show? …This is a network with shows made for children. Shouldn’t they have some sort of moral compass?”
All that being what it is, I can’t recall a single auto-bio that captivated me as much as Jennette McCurdy’s has. I went from ‘no-idea-who-she-is’ to suffering through episodes of iCarly, Sam & Cat, and Between just to better acquaint myself with her career (and for the record, McC can act circles around Ariana Grande—just sayin’).
I will never again look at child actors, stage moms, or Nickelodeon the same way.
____________________________________
“I poop and Mom gets a paper towel with water. I’m embarrassed she still insists on wiping my butt. I tried to tell her recently that now that I’m eight, I think I can handle it, but she looked like she was gonna cry and said she needs to do it until I’m at least ten because she doesn’t want skid marks on my Pocahontas underwear …Wipe. Wipe. Wipe.”
“…Manager #1 repeats, “They’re giving you three hundred thousand dollars and the only thing they want you to do is never talk about your experience at Nickelodeon.” …What the f*ck? Nickelodeon is offering me three hundred thousand dollars in hush money to not talk publicly about my experience on the show? …This is a network with shows made for children. Shouldn’t they have some sort of moral compass?”