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A review by bybookandbone
You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
reflective
sad
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
What a superb book!
You Exist Too Much kept me engaged right until the end. I found it a difficult read in the beginning as I really dislike cheating and cheaters. Zaina Arafat did a fantastic job writing a sympathetic character working on herself, struggling from a kinda crappy person to a healthy person who respect's her partners. I still felt very strongly for Anna. She didn't deserve what she got.
You know, I only just realised that we never learn the protagonist's name when I came to write this review... She was so completely realised that I never even noticed that she was 'Laila's daughter' for almost the whole book.
While I normally would be uncomfortable with a bisexual character written as a chronic cheater, there is a depth here, an exploration of her trauma that explains why. Her sexuality would have made little difference to that expression of her trauma, though she wouldn't have obsessed with older women in quite the same way. The depiction of a psychologically abusive mother was also superb. Instead of being outright vilified, you understand that there's much more to Laila, having grown up in Palestine during occupation. I also appreciated that not all of her daughter's trauma was lain at her feet.
I wish there had been more exploration of Anouk's relationship with the character. After so much trauma and sadness, the calm, healthy love needed more space.
You Exist Too Much kept me engaged right until the end. I found it a difficult read in the beginning as I really dislike cheating and cheaters. Zaina Arafat did a fantastic job writing a sympathetic character working on herself, struggling from a kinda crappy person to a healthy person who respect's her partners. I still felt very strongly for Anna. She didn't deserve what she got.
You know, I only just realised that we never learn the protagonist's name when I came to write this review... She was so completely realised that I never even noticed that she was 'Laila's daughter' for almost the whole book.
While I normally would be uncomfortable with a bisexual character written as a chronic cheater, there is a depth here, an exploration of her trauma that explains why. Her sexuality would have made little difference to that expression of her trauma, though she wouldn't have obsessed with older women in quite the same way. The depiction of a psychologically abusive mother was also superb. Instead of being outright vilified, you understand that there's much more to Laila, having grown up in Palestine during occupation. I also appreciated that not all of her daughter's trauma was lain at her feet.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Emotional abuse
Moderate: Colonisation
Minor: Biphobia, Domestic abuse, and Racism