earth_to_mars's reviews
17 reviews

emotional funny hopeful inspiring lighthearted reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Am I biased for giving this five stars? Absolutely. But I don't care.

I was so excited when my friend got me this screenplay for the holidays (Thank you, bestie!). It's one of my top three all time favorite films and my all time favorite from Wes Anderson.

As it stands, it's the only book I have marked up to find my favorite quotes and keep track of the parallels between the character Augie Steenbeck and the actor Jones Hall (both played by my favorite actor Jason Schwartzman). The themeing of grief and how it affects both as the play unfolds became more clear with reading the screenplay and keeping track of every hint that the actor was no longer acting in the play.

What, at first glance, feels like a quirky, odd, film of a fictional play about a fictional town in 1955 becomes a rather raw and candid view and interpretation of grief and the extistentialism that comes with it.

This is technically my fourth time experiencing this film/story and I genuinely cried as I've come to understand the character of Jones Hall even more.

Please, if you haven't watched it, watch it. It's worth it.

As a bonus here's some of my favorite (non-spoiler-y) quotes.

"-- we watch, transfixed, as you enter into uncharted territories of the brains and spirit. If you wanted to live a nice, quiet, peaceful life: you picked the wrong time to get born."

"I guess the way I read it: he was looking for an excuse to why his heart was beating so fast."

"I think I know now what I realize we are: two catastrophically wounded people who don't express the depths of their pain -- because we don't want to. That's our connection."

"What's the cause? What's the meaning? Why do you always have to dare something?"
"I don't know. Maybe it's because I'm afraid, otherwise, nobody'll -- notice -- my existence -- in the universe."

"I don't like the way that guy looked at us."
"Which guy?"
"The alien."
"Oh. How'd he --"
"Like we're doomed."

"It's all worthwhile. In your lifetime. This, I mean."
"OK."
"Your curiosity is your most important asset. Trust it. Trust your curiosity."

"You can't wake up if you don't fall asleep."

Content Warnings

Mister Magic by Kiersten White

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challenging dark emotional mysterious tense slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

To see my full review, go to my page, this is solely about the audio book.

For my first audio book, I enjoyed it! I think the narrator did a really good job sounding sinister to help the atmosphere while also sounding differnet enough for each character's voice that one wouldn't get confused. I think it helped me retain a little more of the information that I might have otherwise forgotten just reading the actual book.

Not sure if I'll go back to audio books, but I'm glad I tried it out!

Content Warnings

Mister Magic by Kiersten White

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challenging dark emotional mysterious sad tense slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Mister Magic ened up being my last book of 2024 and what a better way to end the year than an allegory for Mormon indoctrination and healing from religious trauma?

This is the first and only book (as of writing this) I've read in tandem with the audio book version (more on that in the audio book review).

We follow Val/Valentine, who has blocked all of her childhood memories, as she's reunited with the other kids (now adults) from the mysterious -- and seemingly not real -- children's program, Mister Magic. Doing reunion interviews of a show with no physical recording, Valentine slowly starts to uncover why exactly she's repressed all of her childhood, opening the door to answer the question: Who (or what) is Mister Magic?

First off, I loved the characters. Javi, Marcus, Jenny, Val and Isaac feel like real adults who all deal with seperate problems that comes with being an adult with trauma that hasn't been unpacked yet. To my pleansant surprise, all of them are queer. Val, Isaac and Javi are bisexual, Marcus is gay, and the there's scene that leads me to believe Jenny is a lesbian struggling with comphet. It was really nice that all of it was played so naturally, treated as normal between friends. Truly a breath of fresh air and one of my favorite things about the book.

The plot and it's build up is slow, but I feel that's the nature of being in the horror genre and I found myself constantly wanting to read more and more. To find out the mystery along side this circle of friends. The online posts was, in my opinion, a really nice addition as it feels realisitic that people would be trying to online sleuth their way into solving the question of a show that's seemingly disappeared from history, with a figure that was never really shown on screen.

I resonate deeply with the circle of friends, having grown up going to a church that (for lack of a better term) had a very backwards way of thinking. Any questions against the status quo of the Bible was met with disdain and passive aggressive answers. Anything to get a child to stop digging for answers the Bible got wrong/never had. I had to unlearn a lot of harmful things taught to me as a child. I continue to heal from the internalized hatred over my identity and shame around intimacy that was repeated over and over and over again. I, like Val, can barely remember my time there save for one or two events that stood out to me growing up.

This book is important to me in that way.

That being said, I wish the ending didn't take a supernatural turn. I understand why it did and it was foreshadowed from the beginning, but I felt that the allegory would stand stronger without it.

Overall, strong book. Definitely reminiscent of the 90s nostalgia of old kid's television with a mix of classic creepypastas (Candle Cove, 1999 aka Mr. Bear's Cellar, and Where the Bad Kids Go). Definitely would recommend for people starting to get into adult horror and like the 90s aesthetic/classic creepypasta.

Content Warnings

Piranesi by Susanna Clarke

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adventurous challenging emotional hopeful inspiring mysterious reflective slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

This is the second book of 2024 (and third overall) that I'm giving a five star rating. Aside from not reading many books this year, I would consider myself picky to what I give five out of five stars, especially with fantasy.

I think what really made this book special is Susanna's writing style and the way she builds up her characters' personalities through their actions (subtle and not so subtle ones). Her words are direct, simple, but together weave very dense paragraphs that I think of as poetic. I think her style of writing is as close to 'painting a picture with a thousand words' as someone can get.

Piranesi is such a loveable, rootable character. His naivety is charming (never annoying) and makes it easy to feel like the reader is there with him, slowly unconvering more about the House, it's inhabitants, and the mysteries of who The Other and Piranesi himself really are.

I only have one main nitpick.

The Prophet/Laurence Arne-Sayles falls into the predatory gay stereotype as he is the only gay man explicity stated within the narrative. And with him being the one to groom his students and trapping a man in the Labyrinth and his walls until the man suffers psychosis doesn't exactly bode well for his narrative.

That being said, I do believe this was out of ignorance and possibly unchecked biases and not out of malice and I don't think Susanna had any ulterior motive for it. (Still deserves to be mentioned).

Coming from a gay man, I still did enjoy the book. It's not the biggest part of the story, and thus didn't hinder my experience (it was just in the back of my head). I had a lot of fun uncovering the mysteries of the House, and the twist in Part Five was shocking and made me more eager to see how it all unfolds. Most of all, I really enjoyed and adored Susanna's writing style.

I'm happy I was recommended this book and I definitely would recommend it to others, especially fantasy lovers.

Content Warnings

Voyage of the Damned by Frances White

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adventurous emotional funny lighthearted mysterious medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Plot
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

I have very conflicting opinions on this book, but I'll try and explain it as best as possible. There will be spoilers so read the review with caution!

I'll start off with this, I'm not a fantasy reader. I don't read a lot of it, so maybe I don't understand the ins and outs of what makes a good fantasy book. But I did enjoy it. At least until the ending. And the main reason the ending I think fumbles is because of the message theming and of course, the romance. The Wolf and the Woodsman is still the only fantasy book that I think pulled off the romance pretty well.

Anyway, what I did like about this book were the characters. There were a lot. And I think it's hard to pull off a big cast, but Voyage of the Damned did a pretty solid job, as each character had a unique voice and personality and were developed just enough to feel three-dimensional. They were more than just stereotypes of their province, and it works well for all twelve of them.

My absolute favorite thing of the book was Dee's POV. It was such a breath of fresh air to have a character balance heart and humor in their inner dialogue. There were parts that hit a little too deeply and parts that made me, at the very least, chuckle. He's so very obviously flawed and needs to overcome said flaws in order to solve the growing murders on the ship before it's too late. He's realistic, in my opinion. And I enjoyed reading through his eyes.

Now, slight nitpick, this does feel like a YA book at times, which again, feels par for the course for a lot of adult fantasy books, but it doesn't necessarily hinder my enjoyment. There was a lot of exposition through Dee's POV that felt over-explained and at times, unneeded.

What did interfere with my enjoyment was the entire third act of the book, the finale.

Massive Spoilers ahead!

From the least offensive thing to the most offensive:

I didn't mind that Leofric and Cordelia were the killers. I think that made sense, their motivations were understandable. Grief over Lysander led to rash decisions and radicalizations, which can happen, they needed something to believe in. I didn't care for Ravinder faking his death, and despite his Half-Crab/Half-Crow heritage, I don't think his sob story excuses everything he did throughout the present.

I don't particularly like the fact that, not only does Dee get his Blessing, but all of them. It think this messes with the themes of the book, of accepting one's self regardless. I thought it was going to go the other way, similar to Encanto, where Dee realizes he doesn't need a Blessing in order to be powerful, but that his Blessing was inward, that he could bring the provinces without magic. It just feels too 'perfect' for him. I don't even think he really did anything to deserve all the Blessings.

And lastly, the romance. Oh my god, we could have just done without Ravinder and Dee. I think they would have stayed better as exes who had a thing when they were teenagers. I'll say I was rooting for Wyatt and Dee, because I thought it would have been nice, but surpise it wasn't Wyatt! It was Ravinder all along. Which, is deceptive! This is the same person that told Dee he was 'of no value' at the beginning. Part of the plan or not, it's gross! And to excuse Ravinder's (attempted) murders and overall plan of killing all the Blessed because he's sorry feels rushed and for no reason other than to push a gay romance at the end. It feels weird that Dee doesn't even care about the massive amount of deception and absolute terrible actions all for the sake of "love". I'm not going to excuse Ravinder just because he's a pretty boy with a sob story.

All and all, I had fun! It was fun. There's not a ton of magic for a fantasy novel, but I don't personally care. I don't mind the fact that the ending was wrapped up neatly in a little bow. It makes sense considering this is a one-off it seems. It's just a fun low-fantasy murder mystery, and I would recommend it to people who aren't huge fantasy fans and just starting to get into the genre.

Content Warnings

The Guncle Abroad by Steven Rowley

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emotional funny hopeful lighthearted relaxing slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

Unfortunately, I did not enjoy The Guncle Abroad as much as I enjoyed The Guncle. I think many of the small issues (cringy jokes that don't land for example) become a lot more apparent and harder to ignore in this book.

Where there was once heart and emotion and genuine connection in The Guncle, Patrick felt so much more shallow and selfish. He has to go through almost the exact same arc as the last book except instead of letting his family in, he has to let his ex (fling in the first book), Emory, back into his heart. And it's not a terrible lesson, to allow yourself to be vulnerable and live your life, but Patrick learned this already. And frankly, The Guncle was better at it.

There was such a weird rivalry between Patrick and Palomina (Greg's fiance's sister) simply because she was becoming the kids' lesbian aunt. It became a weird Gay Man vs. Lesbian Woman thing and it just felt off putting and like a 'old-man-yells-at-cloud' situation. It leads to a lot of jokes at the expense of women, particularly sapphic and mainly lesbian women, all of which made this book a lot harder to read. It was strange, in poor taste, and felt incredibly out of character and took me out of the story every time. It felt less like a character thing and more like Rowely was venting out some weird and unfounded personal bias.

It's disappointing because I think there could have been more solidarity between the two, and it would have been funnier (in my opinion) to watch Palomina and Patrick team up together and parallel the sibling relationship between the kids in some way.

At least Rowely didn't fall into the evil step-mother trope and Livia is actually very sweet. The bar is... low.

Emory feels like an afterthought. I didn't really care about his relationship with Patrick and I think the ending

where Greg allows Patrick and Emory to get married instead of Livia and him

is rushed with no build up so there was no satisfaction. I mean, they interacted maybe two or three times in The Guncle so all their relationship build up was off screen anyway.

The kids, Grant and Maisie, are the best part of the book (but mostly Maisie). Her fear of Livia 'replacing' Sara is realistic and raw and tragic. It's understandable, she's fourteen and going through so many things at once. I wish we got more of Grant's feelings, but he's a stereotypical eleven-year-old boy. He did have a nervous tic where he picked at his moles, possibly caused by the stress of the wedding and gaining a step-mother, but it wasn't explored and at one point ends up being completely dropped.

The Guncle Abroad, while having some of the same wit and humor as the first book, has none of the heart and emotion. It's lacking and it shows. It should of been more about the kids and their trauma and the idea of grief and how it never truly goes away and less about Patrick relearning what he learned in the The Guncle and going through a midlife crisis.

Content Warnings

The Guncle by Steven Rowley

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emotional funny hopeful lighthearted reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

The Guncle was interesting to me. I'm still reeling from one of the worst books I've read this year (maybe ever), so maybe I'm biased, but whatever. I had fun!

The Guncle is about Patrick O'Hara, a washed up celebrity sit-com actor who has to take care of his six-year-old nephew (Grant) and nine-year-old niece (Maisie) after the death of their mother and his best friend, Sara. Why? Because their father (his brother), Greg, self admitted to rehab for the summer.

When I started reading this I got heavy BoJack Horseman vibes, specifically the first season. The themes and overall mood is trying to strike a balance between funny and sad, grief and humor. And that's not a bad thing. There were parts where I cringed, parts where I laughed, parts where I teared up. It was enjoyable.

The characters are endearing, the kid's aren't annoying (just regular kid annoying, but in a way that doesn't impede on the reading) and Patrick's realization that he is isolating himself because he refuses to grieve his past lover, Joe, is a really strong character arc. The Guncle's version of The Telescope (the episode of BoJack Horseman that was a turning point from typical adult comedy to something more serious) comes in Chapter Twenty, when

Patrick rereads a letter to Joe he wrote in therapy after his death

.

This was the emotional shift that really solidified the four star rating for me. I also enjoyed the scenes with Patrick and his sister Clara. It's messy, it's hard. But it's realistic. Where both have issues with one another, valid criticisms and complaints between the two (other complaints not so much or not their fault), but at the end of their fight, they still manage to come together. I also love the flashbacks with Sara. We get to know her without her being there, she's more than just a mother, a wife, a friend. The person she was lives with Patrick, with Greg, with the kids. And it's heartwarming.

I loved watching Patrick's walls come down with the kids, it's humbling and honestly, nice to watch unfold.

Overall, it's lighthearted, yet heartfelt. It's a story of a broken family, all of them grieving their relationships in different ways, where they come together and slowly start their path of healing together, that's definitely worth the read.

Content Warnings

Self-Made Boys: A Great Gatsby Remix by Anna-Marie McLemore

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emotional hopeful inspiring lighthearted relaxing medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

I want to preface this review by saying that I know I am not the book's target audience. I am an adult and this is for young adults, so the simplicity of the book and blatant statements of its themes are not going to be held against it.

I also want to say that I just came off of one of the worst books I've read this year so my rating is probably skewed because this was such a breath of fresh air after The Sins on Their Bones.

That being said, I want to start off that this is actually a very well written book. The prose are flowy, descriptive but don't overstay their welcome. It's a good balance between similie, metaphor and exposition that don't feel overdone. One of my favorite lines has to be:

"We were boys who created ourselves. We had formed our own bodies, our own lives, from the ribs of the girls we were once assumed to be."

And there's many lines like that throughout the book that make me emotional. Or strike me in a way that I either really enjoyed or heavily related to.

I read The Great Gatsby in high school and I can say the themes — despite it's simplification — are still there. Gatsby still is a prick who compensates by living in excess and overspending his money until bankruptcy until he lets Nick see the unpolished parts of himself that not even Daisy knows about. AM McLemore also adds the conversation of being white passing vs. not white passing and being LGBTQ+ in an era where being a POC or LGBTQ+ person was not welcomed. I cannot speak on the race aspect, but I can say the LGBTQ+, especially the trans aspect was handled with care and respect.

I'm glad McLemore did their due diligence and did not add any harmful language that was present at the time, I feel that would take away from the message they intended here.

[From the Author's Note] As you leave West Egg, I hope you leave knowing this: You are worth being seen as you truly are. You are worth imagining your life for yourself instead of how you may have been told your life must be.

You are worth your own dreams.

I also like that the use of Symington side lacers as a stand in for binders and that McLemore does denounce binding with bandages (very unsafe!) through dialogue from Daisy and again in the author's note. It's brief, maybe a little too brief, but it's good to have regardless.

I think my only gripe with the book is there's not enough of Daisy's arc. I think it's interesting, a girl coming to terms with her sexuality, falling in love despite the world telling her she's only worth what a man says she is. I thought maybe McLemore would make some sort of statement on compulsory heterosexuality. Something I, and many others can relate to. Daisy was shunted in the original Gatsby and I feel she was a little shunted here. Not as much, as she did get her own arc and her own happy ending, but still. She has so much untapped potential and I would love to see more of her and Jordan's relationship and more of her, herself.

In the end, the chemistry between Nick and Jay is well done. Having a T4T couple at the forefront is so rare, and extra rare for them to have a happy ending. In my journal, I compare this to Heartstopper. It is sacchrine, fluffy, but in a way I don't find annoying (maybe I'm just not that cynical). I think this is a good piece of media for young people who are just learning to explore their identities and accepting themselves or for people who just want a book with a fluffy relationship and a happy ending without all the dreariness and bury your gays of it all from other pieces of media.

It's a delightful read and a good break should anyone need it.

Content Warnings

The Sins on Their Bones by Laura R. Samotin

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challenging dark emotional sad tense slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

0.5

Cracks knuckles Alright, let’s do this one last time.

It has taken me over a month to finish this book, my journal for it is filled with complaints and my friends have not heard the end of it. So, lets talk about Laura R. Samotin’s book, The Sins on Their Bones and everything wrong with it.

Let’s start with what I liked. It got that .5 from somewhere. And that somewhere was the concept. The concept of an exiled Tzar (after a civil war in his country) battling his mental health rising to the occasion to fight and take down his abusive ex-husband — who seemingly has God on his side — before an all-out war with demons. On top of that, we have found family with his court, where he learns to heal, to manage his mental health and become stronger than he once was. It’s empowering, it’s hopeful to people who have dealt with abusive relationships, whose families are their friends. On top of that, Samotin uses Jewish folklore/mythology, which is rarely used most fantasy novels, and I think could have led to very interesting and unique magic and monsters. This concept had so much promise.

So, what happened? Why did this fail so badly?

The short answer: It’s genre, Dark Romantasy. It defaults to the usual tropes and issues most contemporary Romantasy books and Dark Romance books have nowadays that drag it down and ends up not delivering on the promised premise written on the back of the book.

Long answer: It fundamentally falls short of every single thing that makes a book interesting and well-written, and I’ll be going through each issue in different sections to make it easier for me and everyone else. Let’s begin! Spoilers ahead, there’s too many to spoil so I’m warning you now!

Before the Book

My initial gripe (which at first I considered a nitpick) was that the content warning list is not printed in the book and is only on her website. I think this is fairly inaccessible, and not everyone will think to look there before purchasing the book, especially if they’re in a hurry or don’t have access to the internet at that point in time. I see this as irresponsible.

I do like that the list is treated with seriousness (looking directly at you Brynne Weaver) and is thorough. Except for two major problems.

One, there is a lot of grooming in this book. Alexey makes it very clear that his only reason to be with Dimitri (initially) is to manipulate him into being exactly the way Alexey wants him to be. He then does the same to Ivan throughout the book.

To prove my point:

"And then, when he [Alexey] was twenty-eight, he met his undoing."

"Dimitri had come with his family on a tour of the region, barely twenty years old and bold and beautiful."

"And so, when Dimitri was left with him after his family departed, bewildered and naïve but willing, Alexey set about molding him."

Two, there is a scene in the latter half of the book where (CW: SA)

in a flashback Dimitri and Alexey have a fight, a brutal one that includes physical abuse (hitting, punching, drawing blood, etc.) and after the fight is over, Alexey proceeds to have aggressive, angry sex with Dimitri without a word from Dimitri.

While her list says all sex scenes are with consenting adults… this isn’t consent and it’s very dangerous to parade this scene as such. No verbal consent/letting Alexey have sex with him does not equal consent. This is dubious consent at best, and a graphic rape scene at worst. And it was not tagged as such. Which I find extremely irresponsible.

The reason I point this out is because I was — for lack of a better term — triggered by this scene and it caused me to spiral the rest of the day. I suddenly found myself wary of reading the rest of the book, afraid another scene like this would happen (which thankfully it didn’t).

In tandem with this, on Samotin’s Instagram, she promotes the pre-orders of this book by adding an extra sex scene from Alexey’s and Dimitri’s first night together — smirking devil emoji and all, as if it was something devilishly fun. And, frankly, I wouldn’t have found an issue with this if

a) Alexey hadn’t admitted to wanting to groom Dimitri for the throne

b) Alexey wasn’t twenty-eight and Dimitri wasn’t (as the book wrote) “barely twenty”

c) Laura didn’t put a disclaimer at the beginning of the book claiming to want to portray abuse with the tact and respect it deserves.

Trying to promote your book by tantalizing your readers with an extra sex scene between abuser and victim rather than oh, I don’t know, the main couple feels disingenuous to the message of wanting to portray dark subject matter with sensitivity. Granted, this is an issue with the majority of dark romance, but most other books don’t claim to want to treat these issues with the sensitivity they deserve and are romanticized for the worst.

So, with that out of the way, let’s get to the actual book and story.

The Worldbuilding

This is where the book is most lacking. Now, not every fantasy book has a map, a glossary or both. And that’s fine. It can work. But it doesn’t work here. We are dropped into the fantasy world of Novo-Svitsevo without so much as an inkling to where we are. To seasoned readers of fantasy, maybe this is a nitpick, but if you do want this book accessible to people outside of fantasy, this doesn’t work. It took me maybe a little less than 40% of the book until I started getting a grasp on the different cities, states, etc. but it wasn’t easy.

I know Samotin may know her world inside and out — obviously, she worked on it. But I, the audience do not. With little introduction and worldbuilding, it was so difficult to follow along and be immersed in the world of Novo-Svitsevo.

And this is just a nitpick, but the amount of cursing also took me out of it. People did not curse as freely as they did, at least not royalty. Men would not curse in front of women, women and royalty were most likely taught not to curse at all, so the constant f-bombs were distracting, unnecessary most of the time and didn’t really add anything to the dialogue.

I find this to be the saddest part, but there was very little Jewish folklore used in this book, especially in the first 50% of the book. And what was used was rather inaccurate. Not once was challah used, they referenced it as ‘braided bread’ but used terms like Rebbe, Kabbalat Shabbat, and Havdalah — albeit very sparingly. Also, a note on Shabbat; according to both my friends who are Jewish, Shabbat is a more modern version of the term Shabbos and that historical Jewish people that did say Shabbat were Arabic Jewish people and not Eastern European Jewish people. In a book like this, that is 19th century Eastern European inspired fantasy, Shabbos would be the correct term and not Shabbat.

Not only this, but there is also the use of the angel, Qafsiel (Cassiel) and while this was a chance to incorporate Jewish folklore and mysticism, it seems that the angel was invoked completely incorrectly. According to A Dictionary of Angels, Including the Fallen Ones Qafsiel is invoked through a Hebrew charm to tell the one invoking it if their enemies are on the run. In the book, Qafsiel is summoned through stimulants (ingesting cocaine) and used to mind-link Vasily and Dimitri so they can converse through dreams. Perhaps I need to do more digging, but I couldn’t find anything about mind-linking through this angel so maybe Samotin could have created a fictional angel, or a fictional incantation inspired by Talmudic Judaism or Mystical Judaism (which is what I believe she used for the fantasy world in this book).

It's a little sad though as most of the magic and mysticism and actual fantasy aspects aren’t until the midway point. By the time the actual fantasy was introduced and being used in the book, it became tedious and a little infuriating. But that’s for the next section.

Plot, Pacing and Overall Writing

This has the most spoilers, so I won’t be blurring them otherwise that would be really tedious.

The pacing is actually atrocious, we have two sex scenes before the one-hundred-page mark, but the actual plot doesn’t kick in until page 250 out of 368 (~65% of the book). I can see where Laura’s priorities lie. The sex scenes could have easily been replaced with actual character-building moments or something that could add something relevant to the plot.

We spend the first half of the book sitting around doing absolutely nothing, watching Vasily and Dimitri go back and forth about Vasily going to spy on Alexey himself or acting more than platonic or flat-out having sex. Alexey, despite how flat he is, is the only one furthering the plot in the first half by looking for people of the bloodline Leyvin and turning them into a half demon hybrid called Zemonyii (which, Samotin… writing a Jewish fantasy novel where the villain wants to create a new race of people by experimenting on them is a fucking YIKES – courtesy of speaking with my friends).

The writing is boring, lackluster, and very straightforward and very, very redundant. We are told exactly what the characters are going to do, how they feel and immediately after, shown the same thing we were just told about. We are constantly told the same things over and over again. Dimitri is sad, Vasily hates that Dimitri is sad and that Alexey caused his sadness, Alexey is not human, wears black and wants to prove that he is right to Dimitri. Instead of telling me this… show me. How deep in his depression is Dimitri? How angry is Vasily? How deluded and power hungry is Alexey?

For an adult book, the writing is childish and treats its audience like dunces.

Even the sex scenes evoke nothing but second-hand embarrassment. There is no love between the main couple, Vasily and Dimitri, and their confession at the end is rushed with very little chemistry between them. In fact, I just assumed they were a couple at the beginning with all the looks, the gentle caresses, the kisses, the sex. I assumed Samotin wanted to make them friends with benefits but instead just made them boyfriends without a label. Which, whatever, the love confession felt stupid regardless because I couldn’t suspend my disbelief enough that these two men were even close to in love. But we’ll get to that.

The plot is bare bones. And look, cliché fantasy plots aren’t bad. Overthrowing an evil Tzar who messed with magic and became immortal isn’t the worst plot and considering how boring the first part of the book was, I was actually enthralled with the magic library and the angel summoning and the plan to sneak into the palace. It was the first ounce of excitement in 200 pages.

I think the reason it doesn’t work is because it becomes absolutely moot by the end. Sequel bait be damned, when the whole plot is about how Alexey is supposed to die and Dimitri literally summons Gavril, gets his arm opened and his bones written on, fucking dies and his body desecrated by Vasily only for both him to come back to life and Alexey heavily implied, then every. Single. Thing. Does. Not. Matter. There were no stakes. I would have had understood more if Alexey just… managed to get away. But no, either Gavril lied and that will be explored in the sequel (I doubt it) or everyone is just a moron. Alexey should stay dead in the sequel, please. Please let me be wrong. Because otherwise everything that Dimitri and his court have gone through means nothing. And do not tell me that was the point. I think that’s a stupid way to go about it.

The last thing I’ll say about this is because it ties plot, pacing and the overall writing together. I did not feel like this was the first book in the series. It really did feel like a mid-season drop in to a series I never heard about until now. And I don’t think it was the post-war aspect because there are stories I know that do this well. It’s just how Laura tells me everything that happened before instead of showing me. Show me how Dimitri’s land is broken after the civil war. Show me how the war has affected the people who aren’t rich. Who were just normal peasants. I think we only really get one person, Zora’s point of view, but oh boy… do I have thoughts on that. I’ll get there.

But yes, Samotin… you said your book reads like fanfiction, and when I first saw that, I wanted to say, ‘Oh don’t say that about your work, I’m sure it’s a lot better than that.’ But I can safely say, it does read like fanfiction in the worst way possible. It’s not a compliment.

You’re a professional writer, not a hobbyist. Do better.

Characters

Oh boy am I going to hate this part. Let’s go.

Dimitri: Objectively, he is the protagonist. And god I wish he wasn’t. He is boring, and dreadfully so. And I hate saying that! I think the exploration of PTSD and depression and how that affects and deters our protagonist is interesting. I think the idea of learning to manage mental health and healing is hopeful and not explored enough, but God, Dimitri is whiny. He constantly complains about every. Single. Thing. And he does absolutely nothing but sulk for 65% of the book. And look, I also struggle with depression, I still have nightmares of my trauma, and some days I can’t bring myself to get out of bed. I get it. But reading about it for 200+ pages is not interesting or fun, nor does it add anything to his character. Also, in his art, does not look like a depressed man (who — I cannot emphasize this enough — doesn’t take care of himself) in his late 20s-early 30s. He looks like a 20-year-old twink. Clean shaven + struggling with depression to the point of not wanting to take care of yourself does not mix together. He has a 180 when the plot kicks in, which I don’t understand what changed. I don’t know if it’s the medicine because he’s only mentioned taking it once and it doesn’t allude to him taking it on a regular basis. There’s not much else, he’s just boring. I also don’t like how the book tries to absolve him of all fault when it comes to the civil war. He may have been manipulated by Alexey (Honestly, I couldn’t tell you, Alexey manipulated and groomed him in many ways, but it was unclear if he actually made Dimitri start the war and I can’t bother to remember) but the constant dick sucking from his friends about how nothing is his fault robs Dimitri of any sort of agency.

Vasily: Oh, Vasily. Easily could have been the most interesting character but squandered so beautifully it’s a sin (on their bones). I honestly don’t think he cares about Dimitri as much as we’re told in the book that he does. Constantly sick to his stomach because of remembering how Alexey treated Dimitri but doing nothing to aid Dimitri other than sarcastic comments and fucking him. Which, I want to talk about that. Dimitri makes Vasily blindfold him and have sex with him so roughly to remind him of Alexey, and yes I’m very aware that this is Dimitri coping (unhealthily) with his trauma, but Vasily enables it. If Vasily really cared, really loved him, this would be a discussion. Because Vasily doesn’t like doing that. And only does it to make Dimitri happy. That’s not love. I can’t make that clear enough. If he loved him, he would be trying to help him find healthier coping mechanisms, talking to him about his fantasies rather than enabling them because it’s clearly making Dimitri feel worse. He also falls into the slutty bisexual trope because of course he does. He only thinks how to forward the plot in the context of sex (possibly sleeping with Zora for information, sleeping with Alexey for information, a thought of sleeping with Dimitri’s half-sister… for reasons?) There’s also something to be said about only the darker skinned man being there to only coddle the white protagonist and constantly making passing thoughts about sex (I know CSA can cause hypersexuality and it affects people different, but this is also the only POC in this book.), which again, is a huge yikes.

Alexey: Alexey is… the Darkling from Shadow & Bone. Or at least an off-brand version of him. The all-black clothing, the black eyes, the knowledge of powers darker than anyone can imagine. With lines like “You dare defy me”, it’s hard to see him as anything but a mustache twirling villain. That is until you get to the parts where he admits in his mind to grooming and abusing Dimitri and eventually Ivan (a twenty-year-old half-brother of Dimitri) — and ends up killing both of them. He is an abuser yet loves his ex-husband Dimitri and uses Ivan as a substitute. And… I wouldn’t have an issue with this. He’s probably the most complex character in the entire book. But this doesn’t work, to me. This idea he regrets hurting Dimitri, including sobbing hysterically when he kills him, doesn’t sit right. This idea that he also didn’t become violent until after resurrecting into something other than human is also poorly executed. I think this sends the wrong message, and teeters on the line of abuser apologia. Alexey was always an abuser and groomer and we, the audience, know this. But we are only told this, while being shown that he has some sort of heart for Dimitri. This is not complex, this is saying ‘b-but he loves him really!’ which it’s not cute, it’s dangerous.

I shouldn’t be feeling sorry for Alexey when he kills Dimitri. But here we are, watching him sob while I see people shout ‘Toxic yaoi! Toxic yaoi!’. On top of that, like I said earlier, if Samotin really, truly wanted to write an honest and raw and sensitive take on abuse, she wouldn’t have promoted the pre-order with a sex scene between Alexey and Dimitri, rather than the main couple, Dimitri and Vasily.

Dimitri’s Court: Ladushka, Annika and Mischa, they could never make me hate you. The best characters getting sidelined so hard for the absolute atrocious men in this book is sad. Ladushka, the aroace rep written to watch sex between Vasily and Dimitri is disgusting. She is only used to aid Dimitri and raise him up. Mischa, the only trans (nonbinary) rep is only used when medical information is needed and has a line that if they died it wouldn’t matter, they wouldn’t be remembered (Holy shit?!). And Annika, who the only things I know about her is that she was forced into an army role and shot in the gut and almost died in the civil war. What’s there to say other than their chemistry was the only good part about the book, and we don’t get nearly enough. Squandered for the most boring sex between men.

Ivan: Plot device. He lives with no personality and dies with no personality. He is only there to be Alexey’s next victim (which is not explored nearly enough) and die so Dimitri can come back to life.

Zora: Oh Zora, we barely knew ye. She was a woman who shows up twice and never again. Like Ivan, only a plot device. Vasily uses her (of course) to get information about her dead brother so he can pretend to be him in order to spy on Alexey.

Which, I’ll put this here. Mikhail died of a chronic/invisible illness. It’s not named, but it enflames the joints and Vasily — an able-bodied man — pretends to be him for the majority of the book. With the stigma of invisible illnesses this was a terrible decision on Samotin’s part. There was no reason for this to be there. It’s not discussed and frankly, it’s quite disgusting!

Other than that, there’s really not much else, so onto the final part.

Representation

For a book that is promoted as queer friendly, boy do I have thoughts on that. First off, the one trans character you put in your little trope post is barely in it. Mischa also says, at the end when deciding who to sacrifice in order to bring Dimitri back, that they should be the one to die because no one will remember them, that they are unimportant. Which, oh my god. What the hell? I’m sorry, but you couldn’t come up with any other reason? That’s disgusting on multiple levels, that this is Samotin’s only trans character.

Talmudic and Mystical Judaism is barely in this book, which is sad considering how little fantasy there is based on anything other than typical white Western European mythology and folklore. I wish there were more fantasy/folklore aspects than there are in this book.

What’s worse is how women in this book are treated like dog shit, either characterized as incompetent and/or bitches, used as plot devices or there to support one of the three points of view, or they’re dead. No woman is their own character, they are all here to revolve around the men in this book and it’s incredibly misogynistic. Even the two lesbians (or at the very least sapphic). One, who isn’t attached to any man is used once or twice, the other is Dimitri’s half-sister. None of these women, and I mean none of them are treated with an ounce of respect. It’s 2024, Laura. Do better. Check your internalized misogyny because it’s sure as hell showing here in this book.

Now, the gay representation. As a gay trans man, I was sorely disappointed. Dimitri is your typical sad boy twink who can’t do shit without his big strong Vasily to do it for him. He’s thin, hairless, small and clean shaven. Vasily, while being the slutty bisexual (I can’t emphasize how wrong that is) — which Laura, you are a queer woman, you should know better — is also your typical rugged, strong man. This is nothing new, it’s on par with most boy love/yaoi couples, which raises a lot of red flags. It falls into the typical heteronormative, Dimitri is more feminine coded, Vasily and Alexey more masculine coded, type of gay representation I’ve been seeing a lot more of. Gay people are not heteronormative, that’s the whole point! Also, forgive me, but it’s also clear Samotin doesn’t understand sex between two men, using only oil as lube and then going for it, with no other prep. It’s just heterosexual sex but with two men. And again, Dimitri being the clean shaven ‘uwu’ submissive bottom and Vasily the strong dominant top is a very black and white view of sex in a queer setting. There’s so much in between, and the only reason it’s not explored is because of the fear of being anything other than heteronormative. Please, check your internalized homophobia. Because all this comes off as is fetishizing gay men. Every single part, including the extra sex scene between abuser and victim. Actually especially because of that part.

Final Thoughts

I hate that I hate this book. Really. I said this at the beginning. It had such promise. But Samotin falls into every single terrible trope that plagues the Romantasy genre. From bland protagonists to barebones plot to make room for sex. It’s a shame because there was such promise in this world. I was so excited, only to be let down so badly I had to write a review so long I wasn’t sure Storygraph would let me post it.

I hope Samotin writes better books in the future. I hope this story can do better in the sequels, however many there are. I hope she actually gets sensitivity readers too, because there’s too many issues to count.

And if she doesn’t improve, then she’s fallen into the same rut as most fantasy writers have. If she does improve, that’d be great. I don’t think any writer should have to fall into harmful tropes and bigoted writing to make a book profitable or viral or what have you.

Either way, whether her writing gets better or worse, I won’t be there to see it.

EDIT Addendum:

Didja miss me? Admit it you missed me.

Turns out, I have more to yap about, thanks to many discussions and rants and rages with my friends (I love you both pookies <3).

One, turns out there’s two… count ‘em TWO extra sex scenes between Alexey and Dimitri. Which, uh, hey Laura… if this book is supposed to be a sensitive portrayal of abuse, how come we’re romanticizing the relationship between abuser and victim? Hm? Why was one used to entice readers to preorder and the other one free? Why was it not, oh, I don’t know… the couple we’re supposed to root for? Genuine question, I mean it.

But then again, I guess this really isn’t a sensitive portrayal huh? With all the interactions you’ve had on Instagram, when people heart-eyes over Alexey you reply with things along the lines of “Sometimes it’s good to be bad”? Is it Laura? Is it? Reblogging/reposting #teamAlexey on your Instagram. Encouraging people to side with the abuser. Laura, that’s not sensitive in the slightest. In fact, neither is your book, because now that I’m back, I have a lot to say, especially about Ivan. Because the absolutely horrid messaging you put in your book is a disservice to victims who don’t have family, or friends, or a support system. Who are alone, like Ivan.

For one thing, I want to go back to the “queernormative” nature of your book. Because it’s not. Queernormative, but if two kings adopt, that child is legitimate? Queernormative, but it’s suspicious when a woman is seen walking alone? That’s not queernormative. That’s still heteronormative. That a woman must be seen with their spouse, that a royal man or woman must produce an heir all their own. It also sucks for adopted children, to not be seen as part of a family. Did you just not… consider the consequences here? Or is your misogyny so internalized that you didn’t realize that your queernormative world still abides to patriarchal standards?

Considering the amount of misogyny within the narrative (see the main review), I’m leaning towards the latter.

Now, for the big one.

Ivan. Now, when I first read this book, I didn’t think anything of him. He’s a plot device. Nothing but a vessel to show how truly terrible Alexey is. An outlet for Alexey’s abuse. But I started thinking about it. Thinking, and then my friend read it, and we were discussing him. We had a heated conversation about whether or not it was worth Vasily giving up his fake identity to save Ivan and whether or not he would have ratted Vasily out. In the end, we were both wrong, obviously. As Jester_Reviews had put it, Ivan isn’t a character. His trauma doesn’t matter because he’s not Dimitri.

The only trauma that is explored is Dimitri’s. To an extent, I get it, he’s the main character. But even Vasily, who also has gone through something terrible (something I know very well), is not given the same love and attention. It’s briefly mentioned, which fine. Doesn’t need detail. But it’s all about Dimitri. He barely does anything to comfort Vasily. You know his partner. Dimitri generally just feels bad about it and then at the end kills Vasily’s abuser. Which, again, good. But like, it doesn’t sell that he actually cares about Vasily. Forget the rest of the court, it doesn’t even matter what they went through even though they’re also ridden with PTSD. I get Dimitri is the main character, I get that when you boil it down, it’s his story. But at least try and pretend you care about your other characters.

Which, going back to Ivan. I am… close to Ivan’s age. And while never in a relationship as horrid as his, I’ve been groomed before. I have been fetishized before. I have had a self-esteem so low that I felt that the only way I’d feel loved is by someone who saw my identity as a dirty little secret. And I am lucky, because I have friends who love me for who I am, a support system that I can go back to. Ivan did not. So many people, like him, do not. And are alone. And can’t escape and my heart hurts for these people. So, imagine my shock, that the way you portray him is a meek little servant with no personality other than serving for fucking porn fodder, only for him to die brutally and tragically at the hand of his abuser. And you have the gall to post a piece of art of him and Alexey and captioning it “Who’s an Ivan stan? Who loves villains? >:)” I’m sorry, choosing between victim and his abuser is genuinely sick and twisted. Ivan, his lack of character, his death, sends such a bad message to victims who are like him, who don’t have anyone. Dimitri was lucky to have friends. And then, not only that, you Laura, have the absolute lack of foresight to write Vasily saying:

“‘He was just a kid who was in love with Alexey, who didn’t realize he loved a monster who was treating him ill.’”

What in the victim blaming bullshit is this? When it’s Dimitri it’s not his fault (and it’s not! He was groomed, and manipulated and abused), but Ivan, who was treated just the same, he should of fucking known better? This is what I mean when I say that this book has serious tunnel vision when it comes to the main character, and double standards too. Vasily did have the ability, multiple times, to speak to Ivan.

How powerful would it have been, a man isolated from everyone, shunned by his family, brought in by his half-brother and his friends to heal with them together? Sending the messages of healing and found family and learning to love again, both platonically and romantically. How powerful would it be to watch victims of the same abuser rise above and team up together to overthrow him?

But no. No. How could I be so fucking naïve? Alexey’s just a bad boy you can sexualize because he’s hot and sexy. Ivan’s just a plot device.

This book was never supposed to be a sensitive portrayal of the worst things a partner can do to their spouse. This, like every other dark romantasy book is just a juvenile excuse to romanticize dark subject matter and the missed opportunity to have a genuine conversation about these subjects makes it all the more disappointing.

Do. Better.

Content Warnings

The First to Die at the End by Adam Silvera

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challenging emotional funny hopeful inspiring reflective sad tense slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

5.0

I read They Both Die at the End years ago. And I honestly thought it was a one off. I loved the book, and I would have loved to see more of this world and it's characters, so imagine my shock when I scrolled through Instagram and came across it's prequel — The First to Die at the End. I immediately went out to find and purchase this book because I wanted to know more. And I was not disappointed at all.

I loved it. And frankly, consider it stronger than the first book. Silvera has made a very compelling alternate world in which capitalism has taken over your life — and subsequently your death by subscribing (for a hefty price too) to Death-Cast, in which they will call when you have twenty-four hours left to live, and you will die before the day is done. How? The Decker (person called) doesn't know. You can only hope it's a painless and quick one.

So, to start off, this is a hefty book, 550 pages. And all of it takes place in less than twenty-four hours. Which makes it sound like a drag, but honestly it wasn't. With charming characters and various different POVs, it's actually a very compelling read and the world feels full and lived in. Each POV is uniquely different. From Valentino and Orion, the main protagonists, to Scarlett and Dalma, friends and siblings to the main boys, to Gloria — a mother who wants the best for her child, to Rolando, a former herald of Death-Cast, to Joaquin, the Death-Cast CEO, to even Mateo and Rufus from They Both Die at the End. We get various different POVs and while it can be distracting to some, I think this style works really well for the books.

Each character has such a unique voice and you find yourself caring for them, even if you spend a brief moment of time with them. The dialogue is — while cringy at times (which makes sense, they're teenagers) — is well done and realistic. I teared up when I saw Rufus and Mateo again, only as small children, knowing what would happen to them seven years after the book takes place.

I also really love that Orion isn't just his tragedies. While yes, Silvera does focus on his viral cardiomyopathy or that his parents died on 9/11, he is first and foremost, an eighteen/nineteen year old, an aspiring writer and a hopeless romantic begging to come out of his shell. Valentino is the opposite, a healthy boy, on his way to becoming a model, extroverted and put together, with a twin sister he loves and cares for. My heart shattered when

it was Valentino who was called. Though Orion would have been too obvious, honestly and cruel.

Both boys learn to live in different ways through spending the day with each other, and despite the Instalove, it feels gradual and well done.

There is so much heart (pun intended, for Orion) in this book, and it will definitely pull at the heartstrings (another one!). I cried at the end of this book as

losing Valentino via him being kicked down the stairs and experience brain death

was heartbreaking, too quick, unfair and brutal. I cried even harder when it was

his heart that saved Orion. That his death gave Orion his life is a cruel irony.

(When I catch you Adam...) It was a beautiful addition to the Death-Cast series. And I can't wait to see where Adam continues to take it.

Content Warnings

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earth_to_mars's reviews 17 reviews

earth_to_mars's reviews
17 reviews