just_one_more_paige's reviews
1527 reviews

dark emotional medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

2.0

I continue my [guilty] pleasure reading of this series. I've gotta be honest, this is my least favorite so far. I feel like Josh and Jules do actually work together really well as a pair, and I usually love this kind of bickering-as-flirting, but there's just something about them I didn't love. I think perhaps because the author tried to shoehorn the "dark" aspects to the spice and storyline into this one. Like, I am in this for the dark and possessive stuff, but Josh doesn't feel like that guy. And the turn towards uncontrolled violence he takes at the end just really doesn't seem to fit the rest of him. So that was jarring. The more difficult parts of Jules' past felt much more natural as they unfolded within the story. On both sides, there were some nice aspects about getting closure and letting go of shitty parental relationships. And I love how prominent previous and other romantic side character stories remain throughout; not just nods, but real roles. In particular, Alex and Josh’s relationship was a highlight for me. Overall, solid writing, great spice (heavy on the angry/punishing sexual interactions, if that's a thing for you - or not), and carried all the intertwined relationships forward, if not my favorite of the bunch to date.

“When I’m not with her, I wish she were there. When I am with her, I want that moment to last forever. She makes me want to be a better person,and when I think about a world where she doesn't exist [...] I want to burn every inch of it to the ground.”

“Grief wasn’t one emotion; it was a hundred emotions wrapped in a dark shroud."

“The monsters in our imagination are often worse than those in reality.”

“Sometimes, people change. And sometimes, they meet people who make them want to change.”

“You couldn’t heal from something if you didn’t acknowledge it.”

“Relationships were built on small moments, not grand gestures.”

Content Warnings

Margo's Got Money Troubles by Rufi Thorpe

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funny hopeful inspiring lighthearted reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

The blurb for this was so unique I knew I was going to want to give it a try. I figured that, if nothing else, it would be entertaining. It was that and more. Shoutout to Libro.fm for the ALC, the narration was great.

Growing up the daughter of a waitress/chain retail worker and a (not present) ex-pro wrestler, Margo never really had a ton of financial security or general stability. She enrolled at a local junior college and is trying to figure out where her life is going when an affair with her professor leaves her pregnant. Against familial advice and the preference of the professor, Margo decides to keep the baby. And thus begins an entirely different coming of age than she expected to have. Marog loves her son, Bodhi, but everything is much harder than she expected (she loses her job, her mom won't help with childcare, and two of her roommates move out), leaving her in dire financial straits. When her distant father, Jinx, shows up on her doorstep fresh out of rehab, offering to move in and help with Bodhi, she agrees.That helps grows when she begins and OnlyFans account and Jinx's pro-wrestling background proves decidedly helpful in building her story/brand on the site. But even as things within her home stabilize, the pressure and criticism from external forces, after Margo makes it bigger than expected on OnlyFans, throws wrench after wrench into her plans for the future. Can she figure out how to navigate it all?

Y'all, what a fantastically, weirdly charming novel. So unexpectedly quirky and I honestly loved it. Margo's was a really interesting and unique narrative voice. So personable. And the back and forth between first and third is something I hadn't really read before and it worked really well bringing Margo to life. Like, she seemed so real. She makes all the choices a genuine person would, for good and bad, with such relatable reasons…it’s like reading about someone I actually know (or at the very least, is like, a friend of a friend situation, you know). Plus, I appreciate the way she was written so much, because she could easily have gotten annoyingly stupid/young or unbelievably too mature, but she never did. Thorpe walked that line to perfection and that made Margo so legit. I loved her.

Topically, I have never read such a totally unique combination of things. OnlyFans and Pro Wrestling?! Just like, what an original, and up-to-date, mashup. And it came with a surprisingly insightful look at the nature of performance, the process and maneuvering of creating a persona versus becoming that persona, and figuring out/remembering what is real. There was also, of course, quite an exploration of motherhood in these pages. It walked a well-plotted line of calling out social contradictions and impossibilities, but doing so in a humorous and entertaining way that fit the vibe of the rest of this slightly off-the-beaten-path story. There were a number of poignant reflections on expectations of females, as we are raised to value looks/body and the power they have, then castigated for using that power the “wrong” way..and the, obviously (if you're paying attention), inherent hypocrisy in the spaces between that. Other noted hypocrisies that holds space in these pages includes: calling out of "feminine solidarity" versus a fury-inducingly familiar public tearing down of a fellow female (whyyyyy do we make it have to be this way?!) and the question of why does everyone look down on sex and revile discussion of it, when most of us do it (and are literally programmed to, for the continuation of our species)?! Interrogations of themes that absolutely make sense and belong as part of this overall reading experience. There was, finally, quite a bit of exploration of the financial, moral, logistical, emotional aspects of motherhood. In this case, we especially get a highlight of how much you don’t know that you don’t know when you’re young (and whose fault is it, really? ...not the youth), and Margo deals with everything she's now facing.

I also want to mention that there were some very real twists in the plot unfolding that I wasn’t expecting. not like , “plot twists” in the traditional "gasp!" sense, but just unexpected aspects or ways that the story unfolded. It kept me super invested. Really, this was a fascinating and well written spiral to watch/read. Even when I still felt like I knew what was coming and what to expect, the narrative voice was compelling and I was bought in and even heart-pounding at times, as the inevitable breaking points hit. But then, like I said, there were some moments where things turned in a way I didn't anticipate. I especially loved the way this wrapped up, from the creative turns the plot took to the relationships that Margo chose to accept/grow or to leave behind to the ways she took charge of her own life/future as she built something that worked for her (and f*ck you very much to those bullsh*t familial/societal expectations otherwise). Plus, I am alwayssss here for a book or situation that asks a reader to open their mind about sex work (as they should!).

I don't know y'all. There was just something about this quirky, funny read that was simultaneously so tender and heartwarming. I felt weirdly empowered after reading it and my life looks nothing like Margo's. I have to recommend a book that left me feeling that way! Plus, if this is a selling point for you, I got a sort of modern age Erin Brockovich vibe that I can’t necessarily explain, but feels right as a watch/read alike. I'm all the way here for this unforeseen stunner!

“But when they talked about the opportunities she would be missing [...] She hadn’t understood they meant that every single person she met, every new friend, every love interest, every employer, every landlord, would judge her for having made what they all claimed was the 'right' choice.”

“It was amazing how depressed you could get and still find things funny. In fact, things seemed even funnier.”

“Because that’s all art is, in the end. One person trying to get another person they have never met to fall in love with them.”

Content Warnings

The Palace of Eros by Caro De Robertis

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emotional hopeful reflective slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

I have loved De Robertis since reading Cantoras years ago. It was a favorite of mine from that year (2020), and remains a favorite to this day. Between that and my established love for mythology and retellings, especially queer ones (which this was, to the utmost), reading this was a forgone conclusion.

This is, of course, a retelling of the myth of Psyche and Eros. Psyche is a gorgeous mortal woman who has captured the eye and imagination of so many that Aphrodite, the goddess of beauty, feels threatened. She dispatches her child, Eros, to take care of the problem. But the sight of Psyche captures Eros as well. So, she defies her mother and spirits Psyche away (under some very false pretenses) to a castle she creates specifically for the purpose of keeping her secret (and therefore safe), from everyone (Olympus and the rest of the world included). To maintain the safety in the secrecy, the two can only meet and come together under the cover of darkness...during which visits they explore each other, with deep passion, and fall in love. What starts as bliss slowly becomes confused for Psyche, who questions the need for the secrecy, the dark, the one-sided sharing, if this is actually the "freedom" Eros promises it to be. And so, she makes a choice that breaks the spell. Once thrust into the "real" world, Psyche and Eros must fight, introspectively and externally, for their love to survive in the light of day. It may be a harsher light, but if they can do it, they may also help remake the (order of the) world.

Y'all. The writing. On a sentence level, de Robertis’ writing is perfection. They capture the essence - pure and clear - of everything they describe. It’s evocative and stunning. The words themselves are emotion. In particular, in the moments of coming together for Eros and Psyche, the writing is as sensual as the acts and stories it tells, it caresses the reader as they caress each other. My goddess. Across the reading experience, it was a very literal effort not to highlight every line. And you'll see how close I came to reproducing the entire novel when you get to the end of this review and peek at how many pull quotes I have.

It should really come as no surprise, if you know anything of De Robertis' other writing (and life), that gender and sexuality were deeply explored in these pages. And that, too, was done spectacularly. First, since I already mentioned the way these scenes were written, the sexual discovery and awakening is so pure. In the unsure aspects of that, there is a parable for queer sexual awakening especially that is incredibly tender. If only all sexuality could be seen this way, as natural and celebrated, as want free from shame. The costs and pleasures of caving to one’s own wants, bucking those socially accepted truths about shame - and the patience and care it takes to create a space enough safe to allow a person to feel able to voice those wants and buck those truths - is gorgeous within these pages. And I appreciated the complexity of learning on both sides, from Eros' place of power and Psyche's place of newness of perspective, to make this happen in a way that felt right, with fullness of agency, for both.

The play with gender and gendered language (through the possibility of metamorphosis in a god’s powers) was sharp and fine, and communicated with a lovely smoothness. It reminded me a bit of Wrath Goddess Sing, as far as purpose and vibes, but with (IMO) much higher quality writing and clarity of story. In a "traditional" - socially - sense, De Robertis really exposes the smallness of possibility and expectation in the life of a woman. It's almost a parable of a telling of monstrousness: the monstrousness of being a wife to a husband as reality versus the belief of monstrousness of being a wife to a wife. As a small piece of that discussion, the contradiction of something being wanted so much that the fight for a piece of it reduces its worth, is conveyed with gorgeously painful precision.

The final major theme explored is the philosophy of what it means to see or know someone, past the basics of sight and name. And who defines that anyway? So very interesting. Honestly, the promise of what people could be, could become, if they weren’t afraid to show and embrace their full and deepest selves, but were instead encouraged to...the joy, the creativity, the comfort, the vitality that could BE, if one was free to belong only to themselves was affecting AF.

The philosophy of sex and gender in this novel (flying in the face of the rigid and caged perspective of it that we popularly hold) is mystical and magical and tender and expansive. And the crushing and confused complexity of love and frustration, passion and betrayal, loyalty and a need for freedom is captured with such force; the words are propulsive. I haven't loved and been as literarily impressed by a retelling since Circe (and goodness knows there have been quite a few of them). It was just that good. Gahhhhhhhh.

“In the rush of the river around me when I bathed there, a living aqueous body surrounding mine. In the way a tree could subsume me, swallow my shadow into its own like water poured to water, blending dark with dark, a recognition and a coming home. In the ease of sinking my body into the cool scope of a tree, oak or olive, fig or pine, blended into them, until I felt my roots deep in the earth below and my head green with leaves reaching greedily up to the sun. In the rich murmur of rain against our roof, spilling tales from the heavens, a wet weeping and laughter of secrets I longed to translate or swim into with my human mind. I could stay up all night listening to the language of the rain. I dreamed I could be rain, sky, river, tree. I dreamed I could be melted by my love for the world. Poured and blended. Lost, remade.”

“The melodies flowed like a stream over dark stones. Sounds unmade of meaning, unclasped from thought or time. Sounds that carried what could not be spoken, soul to throat to ear to soul. I didn’t learn the songs, but they settled in me, deep inside me and yet absent at the same time.” (what words for that simultaneous intergenerational memory and loss)

“But suitors are nothing like coins. Not at all. You can gather them endlessly and still find yourself with nothing.”

“I did not yet understand all the curves and eddies of power, that you don’t have to steal from the powerful to incur their wrath. You don’t, in fact, have to do anything at all. You only need to be perceived as the cause of their discomfort. If the powerful feel something they do not want to feel, and they decide you are to blame, your fate is sealed.”

“…for when a sorrow can’t be stopped, there is solace in giving it room.”

“How could they look so easily on her when her fury was a lamp to sear the skies?”

“…for only language takes the truth of who we’ve been and what we’ve lived and clasps it to the great necklace of time, keeps it from being forever lost. What can I say. That the hand against my hair was honey on a thirsty tongue. The glint and shudder of fish in a stream. Silk rippling through sunlight. I was sunlight, in the presence of her hand.”

“I wrapped myself in a sound that draped its beauty around me and also slid right into me, for sound enters through the ear and seep directly into the mind, the bones. With sound she entered me and reached my core. There she hummed, vibrated. There she coaxed sleeping beasts to wake. I had not imagined before that sound could wash the soul the way water washed a body, but that was how it felt those early nights: that this mysterious woman’s music cleansed away the layers left by sadder days, washed the stains of old invasions, eased sorrows I didn’t know I had. I became lighter in the presence of her song.”

"I could not disengage the threads of my curiosity and desire. They twined into a top so fierce it took my breath away. I was taut with it.”

“…what does that mean, what can you call this place, this thing she’s done to me with her mouth, a long kiss? A speaking? A kind of devouring dance? A mouth is a soft wet thing, is it not, how can it be so muscular, so absolute? Shame slipped away, sank into a hot blind sea.”

“What happens with you is more living than I thought could ever be mine.”

“I longed for so much that I almost longed for everything, which is a feeling so vast it curves in on itself, toward the start of the circle, where everything becomes nothing and the longing for everything blurs into longing for nothing, a subsuming in the longing itself, swallowing you whole.”

“Words are power. When you speak what you know, or what you want or what you are, you give it power, more existence, more shape inside the texture of the world."

“I was nothing, anything, colors in the water that the lightest leaf could rupture into brilliant shards the stream carried away.”

“I paint her with my tongue. All the possible colors spring from its tip. My tongue creates. Gives birth to worlds. Her explosion in my mouth remakes the universe.”

“The mind is where violence begins.” (not the body, not hands, not a phallus; none of those are innately violent - the violence they enact is born in the mind, a universally shared organ)

“The border of male and female? […] It’s not such a deep border, after all. […] Or perhaps the border is a mountain range, the kind people declare impossible to cross, but whose ravines are full of green and secret life.”

“Play and joy and searching. Ease and art and fluid truth. Body as lake. Body as sky. Body as wind and flow. The unscripted dance of what Eros knew could also be.”

“So what if a free woman ruins pots or bowls or jugs? So what if some of her markings come out ugly or wrong? […] Because she is free, there is no one to tell her the pot or bowl or just is wrong. Or that she is wrong. Except her own self.”

“The logic of the world was a metal she melted in the forge of her loving.”

“And yet, even when we change, even when we find power inside us and lift it to the light, we still carry in us the wounded animal of our memory, the bruises and scars, the spurning. We want to be un-spurned. We want the ones who held mirrors for us, whether in solace or in mockery, to see us again with fresh, admiring eyes, as if this seeing could affirm us, mend the shattered parts, and make us whole. Those of us who’ve been broken have more shards inside us than we know – and who among us has not been broken, as women in this world?”

“Desire leads to more desire. Existing leads to the will to exist. Boldness in the dark leads to boldness by day.”

“Surely it was hubris of the worst kind to imagine that the shape of the world would change just because we brought our passion into the light. Absurd. And yet. And yet. If it was not so, why this fear?”

“For that is the secret of beauty: it permeates a person, flows from them, in ways that transcend the human eye.”

“Exhaustion crushed me. All I really wanted was a place, somewhere, somehow, in this world.”;

“Gather the whispers of your future, insist yourself into the days to come.”

“Why can’t the shape of things arise from within instead of being forced on us?”

“Too much beauty is a burden. It endangers us. It always will, unless the worlds change.”

“When old ways shatter, new paths can open.”

“Whoever I was destined to become by the end of this day, and the ones that followed, I wanted to experience fully who I was in the now, in the hard-earned and far-flung now, to tattoo this moment into me so I could carry it into whatever came next.”

Content Warnings

They Were Her Property: White Women as Slave Owners in the American South by Stephanie E. Jones-Rogers

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challenging emotional informative reflective slow-paced

5.0

"Southern white women's roles in upholding and sustaining slavery form part of the much larger history of white supremacy and oppression. And through it all, they were not passive bystanders. They were co-conspirators."

I'm not sure who exactly it was, but I originally saw this in a #bookstagram post. It's been, quite possibly, years since then, so I can't give credit where it's due because my memory is just not that good. But shoutout to them, because I appreciate it coming across my radar, and my finally getting around to reading it myself.

This piece of nonfiction, chock full of incredible historical research, was a perspective on slavery that not only is never really considered or given air time, but actively downplayed in an attempt to protect a certain group: white women. The prevailing understanding is that, due to the patriarchy, white women were mostly passive players in the history and reality of slavery, who had to (and chose to) cede all control of their money and decisions to the men in their life. In this text, Jones-Rogers tears down that understanding. From the role women had in financial and legal decisions about enslaved people they/their family owned, to their roles in directing the work of the enslaved people that were their "property" (including decisions on when/how punishment should be meted out, and meting it themselves), to the active role in slave markets, to their fight to retain ownership and/or receive financial compensation when the outcome of the Civil War hit, this book completely reframes the facade of powerlessness that has protected the reputation of white women in connection to slavery across time.

Jones-Rogers shatters the illusions of the innocence of white (mostly Southern) women, who (whether out of genuine want/gain or due to a lack of interest - or capacity - in changing societal status quo) engaged directly in violence against enslaved people, as well as profited directly (gaining their own power and financial benefit, separate from their fathers/husbands) from the owning of enslaved people and the work they were forced to do. She erases the easy excuse of patriarchy for white women’s lack of action on solidarity with enslaved peoples (and the carryover into today's lack of intersectional feminist solidarity). Working to better yourself within a society that has constraints on you does not absolve you from the shame and judgement that should come from treating others, those that our broken society puts below you, badly in order to make their progress. The lesson that crushing others to get ahead just because that’s the only path that seems available to you is not an excuse/absolution is strong in these pages. (For even further lessons on this same theme - that life is not a zero sum game - but in a more modern context, check out The Sum of Us.)

I do want to note that the writing is very academic. It's a bit like reading a textbook or dissertation (so, a bit dry)... I mean, it's definitely more narratively inclined than that, but not by too much. That being said, I was very glad to also have the audiobook to help me through it.

To close, the overall picture Jones-Rogers presents within isn't new, but this new perspective she delves into was deeply researched, well presented, educational and eye-opening (in a reframing-what-you-thought-you-knew sort of way).The blurb about this book ends with "By examining the economically entangled lives of enslaved people and slave-owning women, Jones-Rogers presents a narrative that forces us to rethink the economics and social conventions of slaveholding America." and I really couldn't give a better summary, nor a better reason to recommend reading it.

Content Warnings

If Beale Street Could Talk by James Baldwin

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emotional reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

4.0

My first Baldwin (yes, I know, I'm late). That's it, that's the intro.

Tish and Fonny are young and in love. They're planning to get married and have just found a place to live together. They're excited to move in, and even more so when Tish finds out she's pregnant. But Fonny is falsely accused of a horrific crime and arrested. As both their families set out to clear his name, the narrative follows the wide range of emotions experienced by all - Tish and Fonny, their parents/families, and friends - in the face of a now uncertain (at best) future.

This was very much a scene/ambience and character focused novel. The plot, as it were, is basically what I wrote in the blurb...and very little more. The magic of this novel came from the picture of the characters within this setting and situation that Bladwin painted. The writing, and the narrative was told primarily from Tish's perspective and in her voice, has a unique flow that is a mix of stream of consciousness, colloquial conversation, and some philosophical reflection. It's like a meandering sort of storytelling (we all know that person who goes on many side quests and tangents when telling a story), but one that is quite insightful both to Tish's internal self and the external circumstances of her and Fonny's lives. I was quite specifically compelled by the ruminations on what it means to be a man and a woman in the world, and specifically a Black man and woman in this world, in what is truth versus what is believed/accepted as truth. Anyways, it's a very poetic sort of jumping around.

The interpersonal dynamics also really shine. The nuances of these family relations, both within the family and with each other, are so intricate and authentic. These characters just felt so real - like they were my neighbors and I was hearing about their real life situations, not reading a piece of fiction. Which, really, says two things to me. One, that Baldwin is a very impressive writer. And two, that this situation could be (has often been) real - which likely informed both Bladwin's telling of it and my buy-in to its possibility IRL - and that is, as always, quite upsetting. It makes the heartbreak hit that much harder.

Speaking of, oh my goodness this gets right to the breaking human hearts of the broken “justice” and incarceration system that we have in the US (that has changed very little since the publication of this novel in 50 years since this was published). The fear and grief and sorrow and loneliness, for truly all our characters in different ways (the complexities of which Baldwin does a great job portraying), hurts so much. It’s heartbreaking, to want and hope for a happier ending for Fonny and Tish and to pretty much know they won’t get it. And then, when the novel closes, and you don’t know for sure if the ending is real or a dream (and maybe what’s the difference really?) there's a moorless, hopeful, sadness that I almost cannot describe. Damn.

I mean, there's not much more I can add to the lore of Baldwin's body of work, but I will at least lend my voice to the chorus of praise. The way he intertwines love and passion with grief and frustration in the face of injustice/powerlessness is phenomenal.

“Being in trouble can have a funny effect on the mind. I don't know if I can explain this. you go through some days and you seem to be hearing people and you seem to be talking to them and you seem to be doing your work, or, at least, your work gets done; but you haven't seen or heard a soul and if someone asked you what you have done that day you'd have to think awhile before you could answer. But, at the same time, and even on the self-same day - and this is what is hard to explain - you see people like you never saw them before. They shine as bright as a razor. Maybe it's because you see people differently than you saw them before your trouble started. Maybe you wonder about them more, but in a different way, and this makes them very strange to you. Maybe you get scared and numb, because you don't know if you can depend on people for anything, anymore.”

“I guess it can’t be too often that two people can laugh and make love, too, make love because they are laughing, laugh because they're making love. The love and the laughter come from the same place: but not many people go there.”

“It’s funny what you hold on to to get through terror when terror surrounds you.”

“Though the death took many forms, though people died early in many different ways, the death itself was very simple and the cause was simple, too: as simple as a plague: the kids had been told that they weren't worth shit and everything they saw around them proved it. They struggled, they struggled, but they fell, like flies, and they congregated on the garbage heaps of their lives, like flies.”

“It doesn’t do to look too hard into this mystery, which is as far from being simple as it is from being safe. We don't know enough about ourselves. I think it's better to know that you don't know, that way you can grow with the mystery as the mystery grows in you. But, these days, of course, everybody knows everything, that's why so many people are so lost.”

“They were so free that they believed in nothing; and didn't realize that this illusion was their only truth and that they were doing exactly as they had been told.”

“Time could not be bought. The only coin time accepted was life.”

“Neither love nor terror makes one blind, indifference makes one blind.”

“Each of these men would gladly go to jail, blow away a pig, or blow up a city, to save their progeny from the jaws of this democratic hell.” (damn, and who wouldn’t, and why should they have to/why are they even forced into this position in the first place)

“Despair can make one monstrous, but it can also make one noble.”

“The mind is like an object that picks up dust. The object desn't know, any more than the mind does, why what clings to it clings. But once whatever it is lights on you, it doesn’t go away…”

“He’s beautiful. They beat him up, but they didn't beat him - if you see what I mean. He's beautiful.”

Content Warnings

The Familiar by Leigh Bardugo

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dark mysterious tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

5.0

Look, I will read literally anything that Bardugo writes. And I am thrilled to say that her writing is only getting better (plus, this move into adult novels, and away from YA, really does line up with my own age-level reading interest changes, so that's nothing if not convenient). But beyond all that, this book is perfect for me: dark, magical, a bit of historical fiction, Spanish, and deals with the/a devil. Plus, a small (unexpected) romance with a satisfying and darkly (on point for the vibes) happily ever after.

Luzia Cortado is barely making it through her days as a scullion maid, eased only by the bits of magic passed down from her mother that make certain daily chores a bit easier. When her mistress notices her magic, she forces Luzia to use them to better the family's social position. Which puts a dangerous spolight on Luzia, living as they do in the time of the Spanish Inquisition, where any hint of devil-worship or blasphemy (so, not being Catholic) means imprisonment, torture and probably death. Almost immediately, Luzia is noticed by Antonio Pérez, looking to regain his place at the side of Spain's king by any means necessary...including setting up a magical tournament to find the King a champion to help regain his own international position (the defeat at the hand of the British Armada having damaged his standing deeply). With the "help" of her aunt, her aunt's patron, and - most importantly - Guillén Santangel, the immortal familiar of her aunt's patron, Luzia prepares to compete. As Santangel teaches her how to wield her magic, he realizes how powerful Luzia actually is, and despite the incredibly tenuous position this puts them both in, also realizes his feelings for her are growing into something he hasn't experienced in a long, long time. With the eyes of a kingdom on them, and the lines between real magic, fraud, and religious conviction unclear and fraught with danger, they'll have to fight with all the wit and sorcery they've got to make it out alive and together and...just maybe...free.

Yup, Bardugo really brought it with the atmospheric aspects of this novel. She brought this version of the Spanish Inquisition to life. The realistic aspects, like the razor thin line upon which everyone walked, the "on tenterhooks" aspects of daily life, because anything and everything could get you accused of heresy, had me feeling the tension on almost every page. And it was enhanced further by Luzia's day-to-day life situation - no connections to money/influence, having actual magic (that definitely was not gifted from "God"), being of Jewish ancestry, directly in the eye of the Crown - all of which were dangerous on their own, much less put together. The court and social intrigue, and political machinations, were also written with a nuance and complexity that made them feel tangible. Obviously some of the historical characters/details are true, but some are definitely fabricated, and I wasn't ever totally sure which was which (past the big things, like the defeat of the Spanish Armada, of course) and that felt like great historical fiction writing to me.

Naturally, Bardugo shines with the infusion of magical elements into the setting and plot. The mix of ancient and forbidden language as the lingual aspect to Luzia's magic, plue the tunes that "feel" right to her that bring it fully to life, was really cool. There was a mysticality to it that, when read alongside the other magical styles (like prophetic dreams and focusing stones) and magical philosophy and research (courtesy of Santangel), was a more subtle practice that one might sometimes see, but that fit the vibe of the novel just right. Plus, I have always had a soft spot for "deals with a devil" style stories, so I am biased towards that magic here as well.

Luzia herself was an interesting and refreshingly unassuming MC. She was full of spirit and resolve and, as a character, balanced the "naive" to society with the "knowledge" of harder life experience (aging out of youth too quickly) very well. Santangel was also a really interesting foil – the opposite of Luzia in age and experience (his youth was too lighthearted and his present is resigned and bitter, no fight left in him). It’s opposites attract in a very unique way. Speaking of. I was super unsure about the romance aspect to start. And while I objectively am still not sold, I totally get why, subjectively – in the context, the pull between them happened. They are a perfectly imperfect pairing of second chances and reframed “wants” from life, balancing each other out (both emotionally and with the power/knowledge they bring to the other). And their ending, as I mentioned earlier, left the right sort of bittersweet, sort of darkish and creepy but weirdly sweet, taste in my mouth.

The plot was mostly background for me, honestly. Like, it was an interesting spin on magical competition, what with the courtly intrigue and threats of the Inquisition. But it wasn’t so unique that it stood out. But, it was robustly developed (the why and how of it, etc.) and acted as a solid framework for the rest of what Bardugo brought to the tale though, and for that, I was happy with it and the role it played. And credit where it’s due, there were a few twists and turns of will and magic that took the story in directions I wasn’t expecting.

One final word about the writing. This novel unfolded with a slower pace that leant itself to the subdued, but ever-present fire of the story, like smoldering coals. There was a quiet, smooth cleverness in the writing that provided for fantastic sinister undertones (layers and multiple meanings) threaded throughout, under all conversations and interactions. It was all so deliciously tense and, as I’ve already mentioned, wonderfully atmospheric.

Overall, what a story! Transporting and enchanting in a darkly mystical homage to ancient magics and fairytale storytelling. It managed a somehow newer, more modern, voice while maintaining that mystical quality. I simply lovely getting swept up in this.

“Better to live in fear than in grinding discontent. Better to dare this new path than continue her slow, grim march down the road that had been chosen for her. At least the scenery would be different.”

“Later Luzia would understand that when it came to anything worth having, there was no end to more.”

“Wishes granted were rarely the gifts they seemed. Any goose who believed otherwise hadn’t listened to a story all the way to its end.”; “Money was a wonderful tonic for fear.”

“Language creates possibility. Sometimes by being used. Sometimes by being kept secret.”

“Fear men, Luzia. […] Fear their ambition and the crimes they commit in its service. But don’t fear magic or what you may do with it.”

“All empires are the same empire to the poor and the conquered. But not all empires are the same.”

“Faith could be won. Curses could be broken.”

“Did it matter who held the power? […] What difference did it make if the person with the power wasn’t you?”

“A life lived hungry could lead you to eat from anyone’s hand.”

“Was there anything more dangerous than a man full of hope?”

“They did not age. They did not change. They traveled the world a thousand times over. They may be traveling still.”

Content Warnings

Rise and Divine by Lana Harper

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adventurous emotional mysterious fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

4.0

And here we are, for real this time, the fifth and final installation of this witchy romance series. It's been a wonderful, lovely, spicy little journey. And I'm sad it's over, but I have to say, this closed it out well for me. Also, that cover is GORgeous.

Our last time in Thistle Grove focuses on Dasha (an Avramov-Harlow daughter, though heavily leaning the former in affinity) and Ivy (a clear and classic Thorn). They've had a rocky history, with some of Dasha's personal challenges getting in the way of the more lasting connection that they both want. Dasha's ability - she's a devil eater - means she crosses the veil quite a bit while banishing demons. And despite what one might think, it feels good to be there; after both her parents' deaths, Dasha struggled to find reasons to stay in the real world. She made it through that, barely, and her ability and will are about to be put to the test because the biggest celebration in Thistle Grove, one that comes only every 20 years, is invaded by the shade of a dark, chaotic god...and Dasha may be the only one who can save the town. Oh, and her connection with Ivy might be the only thing that is strong enough to help her survive thit, so thank goodness their time spent together planning the festival has rekindled some of the sparks between them.

Ok if I'm being honest, this romance wasn't necessarily my favorite of the bunch. It was solid, and Dasha and Ivy seem like they are a good fit for each other, but the fact of their on-again/off-again past means that some of the on-page development of their relationship felt lacking. It was easy for Harper to fall into "they fit together so well" and "they knew each other already," with only a few new confessions/vulnerabilities, so it did feel a bit shallower than it otherwise might have. However, that meant the spicy scenes were very smooth, no awkward newness, which is sometimes nice. I enjoyed it here. And to be transparent, the connection between Dasha and Ivy was clear, and solid. So there wasn't anything wrong with the romantic aspects here, they just felt less robust/more background to the plot, than in some of the previous books.

Speaking of the plot...it was eventful! There was possession and visitations from gods (beneficent and otherwise) and mysteries and festival events and all the classic Thistle Grove magics. And it culminated with a really well written coming together of all those magics, a cooperation and communication that was a (literally and figuratively) enchanting way to leave these families, who had been quite a bit more antagonistic towards each other when we first met them. The way this story really centered on the clashing of primordial godlike forces - creation and destruction - fit right, as a finale. It explained some of the mysteries about town, and sources of magic there, that hadn't been covered yet. And it increased the drama to an extreme that made for both an entertaining big finish and a satisfying place to stop (there's really nowhere to grow the story from here, tbh). I also enjoyed, as a thematic element, the look at oppositional gods/forces created to be pulled toward each other, but never able to actually meet the needs of the other. It’s a fascinating and humanizing look at a divine mythology that’s captivated the entire world since its birth and, conceptually, I found it really interesting. All that power and no capacity to change, it’s surprisingly static/flat while humanity gets all the dimensionality. What a reframe.

And because those plot elements were so larger-than-life, it was nice that the romance was a bit...smaller. It provided some space for the small things to shine, and I loved that. There was a sweet and tender highlighting of the power of the precious small parts of life - a favorite breakfast, a perfectly green leaf and wind in your hair, the smell of a fall candle - those fragile and easily overlooked, but comforting parts of life. The way they can stand up to the ostentatious and extravagant and gluttonous and overheating feelings of life, and provide a safe harbor from that, bringing solace, was a bit like reading a contented sigh. Which was a great balance to bring as a foil to the big emotions, reactions and events of the rest of the story.

As I mentioned at the start, this was a very satisfying series finale to this series. I’ve loved being in Thistle Grove throughout it all, and I’m sad to see it end, but I’m also content leaving it here. And that’s really all I could have asked for in a closing book. I tip my hat (as it were) to Lana Harper. Thanks for this journey.

Content Warnings

Twisted Games by Ana Huang

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dark emotional fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.0

Y'all - I knew what I was getting into, picked this up for that reason, and got what I wanted. These are definitely cringe, as all the novels in this erotic unhealthy possessive contemporary darkish mainstream romance genre that’s blooming right now are. But I cannot help it, they're escapist. And I'm in my smut era. But I do have to say, props to Huang because the writing is solid (as opposed to many in this genre). Like the words and sentences and dialogue are written intelligently...and have been edited. I deeply appreciate that. Some of the character points/experiences are a bit over the top for dramatic effect - of course - butttt overall I was entertained. And this outward-badass but softie-for-his-lady situation is a bit more my speed than the last one (Alex was actually actively a bit scary, and didn't grovel quite enough IMO...though nothing can really touch the last one for drama). It's unhealthy, and I do kinda think the spicy scenes here were more for effect than they actually should have been, based on how the relationship developed, but again, Huang is giving the people what they came for - while giving it a plot framework - and I can't fault that. Long story short, I sped through this, enjoyed the cameos and setups for the rest of the series (as I'm used to, and look forward to, with these kinds of interconnected-series-but-still-standalone romances), and will definitely be reading the rest.

“But people were people, no matter their title, and some desires were universal. Unfortunately, the ability to fulfill them was not.”

“There’s no such thing as *just* a story. Every story is important.”

“Even when you’re not there, you’re everywhere. In my head, in my lungs, in my fucking soul.”

Content Warnings

My Contrary Mary by Jodi Meadows, Brodi Ashton, Cynthia Hand

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adventurous funny lighthearted fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

4.0

Alright look, I read My Lady Jane so long ago that the details are fuzzy, but I remember laughing and enjoying it a lot. (And I liked My Plain Jane even more, I think.) So, when I saw a tv adaptation coming to Prime, I was hype. And THEN I watched it and it's the literal best thing I have ever seen on television. It had it all: laugh out loud humor, hot AF romance (the tension, the verbal sparring, the eye-gazing, the consent-getting!), magic, drama, one of my fav periods of history (and the outfits!), and a soundtrack that rocked. So, I'll have you know, I was devastated to learn we aren't getting any more. How is that even possible?! I mean, yes, it's very niche. But also, it was everything. So, here I am, drowning my sorrows by finding my way back into this world in the only way I can, reading the (tangential) sequel.

One can't tell the story of Tudor England without Mary, Queen of Scots. In My Contrary Mary, we meet her as a young woman in the French Court, betrothed to Francis, the dauphin. And in this version, she has a very big secret: she is an Eðian (shapeshifter) - able to turn into a mouse - in a kingdom where Verities rule. It's a secret that could cost her (any everyone who knows) their life. And in a court that is full of plots and treason and power plays and conspiracies and magic potions and other secret Eðians, there is danger everywhere. Even more so now that the king of France has suddenly died. But with her four trusted ladies (all also named Mary, naturally), a confidant like Francis as her future husband, and a new ally in the court seer's daughter, Ari, maybe Mary can not just survive, but also, actually take her rightful throne(s).

Alrightttttt this was fun. I am grudgingly happy I read it, because I truly enjoyed it, but that also means I am now fully and completely done with all media from this world. Massive *sad face.* But for real though, this really was about as diverting as a book could be. Quite tongue in cheek, though perhaps less laugh out loud than previous books (My Plain Jane, especially). The observational interjections from the author(s), both as foreshadowing and a present-day commentary on historical practices/concepts, were silly-smart, as befit the vibes. And the “visions” Ari has that are all famous movie scenes were funny. I enjoyed recognizing what they came from, and it was a nice touch when some of them come back in as actual plot points/lines of dialogue later.

The reworking of history to rewrite the tragedies into something more uplifting/happy-ending-like, while retaining the bones of historical accuracy, is a creative concept that this author team continues to manage well. The interjection of magic is just a great bonus. I do always love magic. And the adventures these characters have when it all gets put together is ridiculous and entertaining in all the best ways. Plus, a final highlight for me, as this is a sort of sequel, was th cameos we got from our My Lady Jane favorites. Seeing what Jane, Gifford, and Edward are all up to now, at least a bit (and having them aid Francis and Ari in saving both Elizabeth, and, in turn, Queen Mary) was a small balm for my grieving heart. Haha.

Honestly this is just great fun. Nothing intense or reflective or high brow, but still smart and dryly humorous and totally amusing. Delightful literary escapism, at its finest.

Content Warnings

Swift River by Essie Chambers

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emotional reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

No real story to intro for this novel. It sounded interesting and worth checking out as a debut author. So, here we are.

Burb courtesy of Goodreads: "It’s the summer of 1987 in Swift River, and Diamond Newberry is learning how to drive. Ever since her Pop disappeared seven years ago, she and her mother hitchhike everywhere. But that’s not the only reason Diamond stands out: She’s teased relentlessly about her weight, and the fact that since Pop’s been gone, she is the only Black person in all of Swift River. This summer, Ma is determined to declare Pop legally dead so they can collect his life insurance money, get their house back from the bank, and finally move on. But when Diamond receives a letter from a relative she’s never met, key elements of Pop’s life are uncovered. She is introduced to two generations of African American Newberry women, spanning the 20th century and revealing a much larger picture of prejudice and abandonment, of love and devotion. As pieces of their shared past become clearer, Diamond gains a sense of her place in the world and in her family. But how will what she’s learned of the past change her future?"

I'm glad I decided to pick this one up. It was not a fast moving story, despite there actually being quite a bit that happened on page, so I was glad to have the audiobook to move me through. But the slower pace fit the story so well. This is a slice of life novel of a very specific life I’ve never read before, and you know I always appreciate reading for the different things it opens my eyes to.This one was interesting because the setting, that kind of lost in the middle small but not rural town, is honestly a bit like where I live now. And there were many parts that were familiar as a result. Then, there was the fact that this took place in the North, and addressed sundown towns (a situation/reality that I had not heard of specifically, and yet, upsettingly, was not at all surprised by), and was centered on the experiences of an MC whose life looks nothing like my own. And so, the "new" far outweighed the "familiar," though the small details that rang true for me, too, did make the story that much more grounded and affecting.

Sort of related, there is a homeyness to this novel that came very unexpected. There was comfort, even though Diamond's life is nothing like what many would dream for themselves, because the author finds a way to communicate the small sweetnesses in the everyday mundanity and the importance of family connection (even when complicated) when the love behind it is real. One of my favorite aspects of this reading experience was those exact connections. There were so many times that it would have been easy for our characters, Diamond especially, to lean into the hurt and loss and frustration and anger and cut off familial attachments entirely. And she at least does consider it, while some others (her parents, for example) both consider and take some steps in that direction. But there is also a deep well of grace, understanding, and forgiveness - a level of maturity that often we can but aspire to IRL - that allows Diamond, at least, to move forwards with her life (to do and be more) while also maintaining those relationships. That's not to say she has no frustrations, griefs, angers, unfulfilled needs - as we all do - but she never lets that be all of her. And that is something to aspire to. Plus, it makes it that much more satisfying when she gets a fuller ending, one with more promise and opportunity than she ever expected. It feels so deserved; if only real life were more like that.

Look, I get that reading messy stories and characters is entertaining (I enjoy those too), but the occasional novel like this, with its quiet strength, is comforting. Keep in mind though, that I say that this had a comforting vibe, I must also mention that the themes within the story are not at all soft and easy. There is quite a bit of childhood and ongoing trauma (loss of a parent, lack of closure, grief, uncomfortable age/power-differential relationships, poverty/instability, bullying, racism and more). Chambers does a phenomenal job showing the immediate and accumulating effects of all that trauma, but never hits you over the head with it. And she uses some epistolary formatting for historical familial/locational context and to mix up narration in a not-overwhelming way, as well as a little mystery (one with no clear conclusion, but that functions as a coming of age as Diamond comes to terms with not knowing - similar to What Happened to Ruthy Ramirez), to ferry the novel to its conclusion and Diamond towards her future.

I am just so impressed that this novel managed to walk the line of cozy and claustrophobic, as a small town setting, so well. It's such a confusing and human reality, to both love and hate the place and people that made you, and Chambers captures it all here. An impressive debut.

“When you have a terrible thing happen that everyone knows about, you can be laid out flat by anyone.”

“I guess we’re all guilty of looking the other way when something is too sad or shameful to speak on.”

“Your hometown makes you and breaks you and makes you again.”

“She had that specific kind of rootlessness that comes when you're orphaned by two living parents. Where you flit and float, and there is an invisible pull to the earth, but you are jilted by gravity.”

"Aunt Tilly says that our instincts, our deepest intuitions, are really our ancestral memory; our people speaking through us.”

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just_one_more_paige's reviews 1527 reviews

just_one_more_paige's reviews
1527 reviews