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samflowerv6's Reviews (425)
“Men always say that as the defining compliment, don’t they? She’s a cool girl. Being the Cool Girl means I am a hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football, poker, dirty jokes, and burping, who plays video games, drinks cheap beer, loves threesomes and anal sex, and jams hot dogs and hamburgers into her mouth like she’s hosting the world’s biggest culinary gang bang while somehow maintaining a size 2, because Cool Girls are above all hot. Hot and understanding. Cool Girls never get angry; they only smile in a chagrined, loving manner and let their men do whatever they want. Go ahead, shit on me, I don’t mind, I’m the Cool Girl.
Men actually think this girl exists. Maybe they’re fooled because so many women are willing to pretend to be this girl. For a long time Cool Girl offended me. I used to see men – friends, coworkers, strangers – giddy over these awful pretender women, and I’d want to sit these men down and calmly say: You are not dating a woman, you are dating a woman who has watched too many movies written by socially awkward men who’d like to believe that this kind of woman exists and might kiss them. I’d want to grab the poor guy by his lapels or messenger bag and say: The bitch doesn’t really love chili dogs that much – no one loves chili dogs that much! And the Cool Girls are even more pathetic: They’re not even pretending to be the woman they want to be, they’re pretending to be the woman a man wants them to be. Oh, and if you’re not a Cool Girl, I beg you not to believe that your man doesn’t want the Cool Girl. It may be a slightly different version – maybe he’s a vegetarian, so Cool Girl loves seitan and is great with dogs; or maybe he’s a hipster artist, so Cool Girl is a tattooed, bespectacled nerd who loves comics. There are variations to the window dressing, but believe me, he wants Cool Girl, who is basically the girl who likes every fucking thing he likes and doesn’t ever complain. (How do you know you’re not Cool Girl? Because he says things like: “I like strong women.” If he says that to you, he will at some point fuck someone else. Because “I like strong women” is code for “I hate strong women.”)”
“There’s something disturbing about recalling a warm memory and feeling utterly cold.”
“Tampon commercial, detergent commercial, maxi pad commercial, windex commercial - you'd think all women do is clean and bleed.”
“It’s a very difficult era in which to be a person, just a real, actual person, instead of a collection of personality traits selected from an endless Automat of characters.”
Moderate: Confinement, Cursing, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Miscarriage, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Sexism, Toxic relationship, Blood, Vomit, Medical content, Grief, Stalking, Murder, Pregnancy, Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, Alcohol
“I spent my life folded between the pages of books.
In the absence of human relationships I formed bonds with paper characters. I lived love and loss through stories threaded in history; I experienced adolescence by association. My world is one interwoven web of words, stringing limb to limb, bone to sinew, thoughts and images all together. I am a being comprised of letters, a character created by sentences, a figment of imagination formed through fiction.”
“You're absolutely delicious when you're angry."
"Too bad my taste is poisonous for your palate.”
Graphic: Confinement, Emotional abuse, Gore, Mental illness, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Grief, Medical trauma, Murder
Moderate: Child death
Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Animal death, Gore, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Torture, Violence, Blood, Grief, Stalking, Death of parent, Murder, Toxic friendship
“I had absolutely no interest in being somebody else's muse.
I am not a muse.
I am the somebody.
End of fucking story.”
“Men often think they deserve a sticker for treating women like people.”
“I think you have to have faith in people before they earn it. Otherwise it's not faith, right?”
“I used to think soul mates were two of the same. I used to think I was supposed to look for somebody that was like me. I don't believe in soul mates anymore and I'm not looking for anything. But if I did believe in them, I'd believe your soul mate was somebody who had all the things you didn't, that needed all the things you had. Not somebody who's suffering from the same stuff you are.”
“I wish someone had told me that love isn’t torture. Because I thought love was this thing that was supposed to tear you in two and leave you heartbroken and make your heart race in the worst way. I thought love was bombs and tears and blood. I did not know that it was supposed to make you lighter, not heavier. I didn’t know it was supposed to take only the kind of work that makes you softer. I thought love was war. I didn’t know it was supposed to… I didn’t know it was supposed to be peace.”
“Passion is...it's fire. And fire is great, man. But we're made of water. Water is how we keep living. Water is what we need to survive.”
“She had written something that felt like I could have written it, except I knew I couldn't have. I wouldn't have come up with something like that. Which is what we all want from art, isn’t it? When someone pins down something that feels like it lives inside us? Takes a piece of your heart out and shows it to you? It’s like they are introducing you to a part of yourself.”
“When you think of me, I hope it ruins rock 'n' roll”
Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Cursing, Death, Drug abuse, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Self harm, Grief, Abortion, Pregnancy, Alcohol
Graphic: Cursing, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Misogyny, Sexism, Toxic relationship, Blood, Gaslighting, Sexual harassment, Injury/Injury detail, Classism
Graphic: Body shaming, Bullying, Cursing, Emotional abuse, Misogyny, Sexism, Sexual content, Toxic relationship, Medical trauma, Stalking, Pregnancy, Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, Sexual harassment, Dysphoria