starryybella's reviews
11 reviews

The Employees: A Workplace Novel of the 22nd Century by Olga Ravn

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dark mysterious reflective sad tense fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? No
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

"All of us here are condemned to a dream of romantic love, even though no one I know loves that way, or lives that kind of a life. Yet these are the dreams you've given us." 
STATEMENT 011

"The Employees" was more of an experience than a story - I finished it in under an hour, given how relatively short some of the "statements" were. Some of them were only half a page. 
Typically, I'm not someone who enjoys sci-fi, but when I picked this up in a bookstore while visiting my university for next year after knowing it was shortlisted for the International Booker Prize, I had to read it.
It did not disappoint and it's worthy of being more popular. 
I would describe as, well... "No plot, just vibes", except that, in my opinion, it's very character and conflict driven when they meet the objects they discover on the planet New Discovery. 
But that gave to both the mystery of the book and empowered a LOT of the very memorable passages.
Even though not all of the characters in the book were "human", I could sympathize with them. I ultimately did view them as human.
From the holograms of the human crew members' missing children to the humanoids wanting to keep any emotion or pain they felt because it made them more like their peers they wanted to understand, this was one of the first books in a long time that made me feel something. 
I had very mixed emotions about the ending, but the addendum in the book after what happens to the members on the ship, I still go back and reread.
Remarkably strange but beautiful and human at the same time. This book makes you see the grass differently, breathe in the fresh air differently, and makes the sky a little bluer - Something I've been needing lately. 
This is one of the most brilliant reads I've sat down with in a while.
The Lover by Marguerite Duras

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emotional mysterious reflective sad tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? No
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Almond by Won-pyung Sohn

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emotional funny inspiring reflective fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

I used to be able to win the prompt in Never Have I Ever, “Never have I ever cried to a book for 15 minutes straight”. 
Nope. Not anymore.
Ironically, the book that made me so emotional was the book about a person without emotions - Well, even that’s complicated.
“Almond” is the story of Yunjae, who suffers from alexithymia, where the amygdala, the almond-shaped mass of grey matter in the brain that allows us to experience emotion, is small or underdeveloped. Therefore, Yunjae doesn’t experience emotions of anger or fear or happiness.
Even when his mother and grandmother are brutally attacked in front of him, causing his mother to plunge into a vegetative state and his grandmother to die.
Yet Yunjae didn’t feel anything. He only saw red during that random act of violence that changed his life.
Left to care for himself and his mother’s used bookstore at 16, he has the help of the heart surgeon turned baker on the second floor, Dr. Shim, but it’s not the same without his mother.
It’s through a strange set of circumstances, after severe bullying at high school, that Yunjae meets troubled teenager Gon, who moves to his school after reconnecting with his father. 
He begins to have more perspective into human emotion, and although they start off on an awful note, this friendship is one of the most poignant and touching bonds I’ve read in literature. Two outcasts, who are polar opposites, yet discover things about the world, each other, and themselves throughout the book.
I got so attached to these two boys and their friendship. Through them, it took me through the process of relearning how to feel again.
Gon and Yunjae throughout the book come to answer the question “What makes someone human?”
It’s not emotions, and it’s not reactions or certain “redeeming” actions to others.
It’s both love and our relationships that make us human.
And not only does love make someone human, but it heals and brings us closer - This book was an affirmation that needed to be heard. I couldn’t put it down. 
From one late morning to an early evening, I became completely enthralled with Yunjae’s story.
Something remarkable about this book and about its unique storyline is that in contrast to the distant narration Yunjae provides, he’s surrounded by emotionally vibrant characters. The translator’s note at the end describes how she struggled between both liberal and literal translation to craft Yunjae’s distant tone in the original Korean manuscript. The brilliant translation absorbs readers into Yunjae’s world, 
Another aspect I admire about the book is its small chapters - and in Sohn’s case, less is so much more. It made the story coherent and in every chapter, its poigniacy never falters.
Toasts to the best friendship in literature since Frog and Toad - I’d give this book a hug if I could.

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The Idiot by Elif Batuman

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adventurous emotional funny lighthearted relaxing slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

“The Idiot” is the witty, hilarious, semi-autobiographical story of the daughter of Turkish immigrants, Selin. A first-year student at Harvard in 1995, she discovers e-mail and begins corresponding with one of her Russian classmates, Ivan, and eventually falls for him. In the same Russian class, she also befriends the charismatic Svetlana, who becomes her best friend.
Selin seems to be in the constant pursuit of the answer to the old-as-time question of “Why is everything confusing?” In her naïve attempts at trying to discover what love truly means and the meaning of the world around her, she begins to discover herself in ways that wouldn’t have been possible without Ivan. She travels to the Hungarian countryside, at Ivan’s suggestion since he was going back home to Budapest, and comes to grips with what she wants her relationship to look like with him and what she wants for herself. 
Oh, how this book reminded me of first love. The confusion, exhilaration, and miscommunication of it all hit close to home. First love is hard. Anyone who’s truly been in love can tell you that. Ivan even reminded me of love interests I had in the past. 
In this scary resemblance, I had time to reflect on my love life. Like Selin, my love life has been a lot of things, but it’s never been boring. There were so many parts to Selin I adored, and she was painfully relatable. This book felt like an extension of myself, scooped out of the deepest thoughts of my brain.
What I admire about the book is that her entire personality doesn’t revolve around Ivan, as other readers have described this book to have been. I think the discovery of her personality wouldn’t have been possible if she hadn’t corresponded with Ivan or followed him to Hungary. The characters were human - which also entails ambiguity. They all had their flaws, but they also had some flame to them that even made me like Ivan, as questionable as he was.
For a few days, I got to be absorbed in Selin’s life and saw even more similarities to my own. She has difficulty fitting in anywhere - even in Turkey, where her family is from. She’s also, as the back of the book jokes, “doomed” to become a writer. Observing my own navel, I’ve also been realizing in the midst of applying to colleges, I, too, am doomed to become a writer.
The fact that this isn’t your traditional narrative makes it all the more exciting. It’s the perfect cross between realism and absurdism - while often being rooted in the real world, things happen for seemingly absurd reasons and sometimes, have random or no explanation behind them, leaving us to philosophize and assume crazy conclusions drawn out of air.
Although the setting is Harvard, the clever narration of this story often pokes fun at the “intellectuals” at Harvard and about academia in general. If you don’t understand the references to media throughout the book, don’t worry, it won’t destroy your comprehension of the plot. With a reference to Dostoyevsky for the namesake of the book, my very basic level of knowledge of Russian literature still allowed me to love “The Idiot” dearly. 
As much second-hand embarrassment I got from the book, I loved this blossoming writer with her sharp as a knife humor and her “idiotic” pursuit of love. This book is just as much about love as it is about academia, our emotions, the absurdity of the world around us, college, becoming an adult, and idealizing someone we could hardly ever begin to know. To say it was relatable is merely an understatement.
“The Idiot” was one of the most delightful books I’ve read, and it feels like a breath of very much needed fresh air compared to the other heavier things I’ve read recently. I had a stupid smile on my face after I got finished with it.

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My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh

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challenging dark funny reflective tense slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

If you read books to relate to the characters or “be friends” with the characters, steer clear of this book.
One sentence can be used to describe this book: It’s basically about a white woman white womaning.
This uncomfortable, crude, dissociative, and nihilistic escape of reality has no close substitute for it. I don’t know where to really begin.
The story follows our unnamed narrator, a blonde, thin, beautiful white woman who just graduated from Columbia and is living off of her parents’ inheritance. She is in pursuit of her “year of rest and relaxation”, given the title of the book, and accomplishes this by taking a profuse amount of drugs prescribed by a quack of a psychiatrist (who oddly resembles a drug dealer, and is one in the quite literal, legal sense). She only finds catharsis through sleep - it’s one of the only times she remembers ever bonding with her mother, by napping with her. This is her “transformation” into a new person, to come out as refreshed as ever. 
About ninety percent of the book is about our narrator sleeping. However, Moshfegh is able to make this cyclical drug haze interesting and in a strange way, both readable and unreadable. She makes you feel like you’re the one in this drug-induced drowsiness
Moshfegh has this distinct characteristic in her books about having unlikeable characters in them - and it makes her books all the more interesting to read. 
Our narrator knows she’s privileged in almost every way. She doesn’t care. In fact, she takes advantage of that privilege for her own benefit, and is cruel to people because her privilege and denial or brushing off to accept she has trauma. She’s shallow and can disregard what’s happening in the real world while in pursuit of paradise through sleep.
That made it uncomfortable to read. Not necessarily unreadable, but I couldn’t do it in one sitting. I felt disgust to the core.
And I didn’t feel pity for the narrator either - but you aren’t supposed to. They’re supposed to be repulsive, as Moshfegh confirmed in an interview with the New Yorker.
However, as unlikeable as the narrator was, she was realistic in the sense that because she was so privileged. She had a unique air about her and had this very specific kind of cruelty and projection to everyone around her that only the privileged could ever experience. This is a common theme I seem to read in people who are conscious about their privilege in many aspects.
Because of this privilege and very narrow mindset and priorities, she has this unbearable habit of projecting herself onto everyone around her; more specifically, she does this with her bulimic best friend Reva, who deserved better. The main feeling this evoked for me was pity for Reva for not having a better friend and because she was going through so much, this made her the target of a lot of the narrator’s anger.
I’m repeating myself, but again, disgust. 
“My Year of Rest and Relaxation” also hits on aspects of depression, grief, and trauma that make it all the more realistic. The narrator refuses to accept, it seems, that the indifference her parents treated her with is considered trauma, and instead brushes it off. She never got a chance to grieve her father, and much less her mother. Her depression renders her motivation-less, causing her to want to sleep all the time - She even gets fired from her job at a New York art gallery by drugging herself up and falling asleep in the janitor’s closet. Repeatedly.
What I can appreciate about this book is the fact it doesn’t romanticize depression and portrays it in an extreme, but realistic light of how much of a blow it can be to someone’s perception of reality and of the world around them.
This wanting an escape from how awful reality is, through sardonic humor and monotonous actions, really struck a chord with me. I will say, readers have to be in the right headspace to read this book. I wasn’t really in said headspace when I picked this book up, but in retrospect, that probably gave me more perspective on the book’s meaning, as well as a morbid, unique fascination with this book.
Apart from the narrator, which is the main focus of the book, I have three other problems with “My Year of Rest and Relaxation” that are more minor, but prominent details in the book.
I feel like it’s most likely meant to be a satire on medical professionals, specifically psychiatrists, in the early 2000’s. I can use context clues to imply that, even if I wasn’t alive. However, the fact it was released in 2018 and used this one caricature of a medication-slinging psychiatrist as the face of mental health professionalism in the book really pissed me off to no end.
Secondly, the racism in this book, although not laced throughout the whole book, has sudden appearances that also did not fail to make me livid. I’ll leave it at that, because I don’t even feel like upsetting myself all over again by describing the comment that really made me appalled.
Last but not least, sorry, but what the f–k was that ending? It didn’t sit right with me what happened, as well as it feeling very tacked-on and rushed. I felt that without the last page, the narrator was somewhat reconcilable. It’s what knocked my review from four stars to three and a half stars.
I liked this book but I didn’t at the same time. It’s going to take me a little while longer to clarify my feelings on the narrator and the book.

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Tender Is the Flesh by Agustina Bazterrica

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challenging dark mysterious sad tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

Wow. Just wow.
I know I’ve read rather stomach-turning and graphic books, but I’ve never read anything like this.
Even with “American Psycho” by Bret Easton Ellis, the punches didn’t keep rolling like it did with this book.
“Carcass. Cut in half. Stunner. Slaughter line. Spray wash. These words appear in his head and strike him. Destroy him. But they’re not just words. They’re the blood, the dense smell, the automation, the absence of thought. They burst in on the night, catch him off guard. When he wakes, his body is covered in a film of sweat because he knows that what awaits him is another day of slaughtering humans,” the first paragraph entails. Nothing could have prepared me for that, not even reading the back. Which is why I share it now - take it as you will.
From the first words, we’re desensitized to the horrors entailed in this book - because nothing gets better, as much as you want it to. The descriptions become even more gore-y, and increasingly, the lines of morality in this world become blurred quickly.
Yes, this book fasts forwards to a seemingly not-so-distant future - in fact, the more I read it, it resembled modern day technology, of course, not minding the fact all animal meat production has now turned to human meat production. But no one calls them humans anymore. They’re merely “special meat” when slaughtered or “head” when they’re livestock.
After the “virus” that made all animals dangerous to eat or to even keep as pets, the government implemented “The Transition”. Most pets and animals were slaughtered, and cannibalism became adopted after widely-adopted research showed eating animal proteins is crucial for survival.  
Not just adopted - embraced.
While the book follows our main character Marcos in his day-to-day life in this dystopian future, he faces another problem: he gets an FGP (First Generation Pure, the top-of-the-line meat) female sent to him as a gift. He’s to keep her as livestock, to either artificially inseminate for more livestock, or for slaughter. Marcos doesn’t want to though - ever since losing his child due to SIDS, his wife left him due to the grief and ever since the baby’s simulacrum funeral, he’s sworn off of eating meat. He names her Jasmine after her natural scent of wild jasmine, and becomes increasingly more sensitive to her humanity.
The second part of the book takes a turn
after Marcos indulges in the crime of “enjoying” the livestock - and impregnates Jasmine. This could land them both in the Municipal Slaughterhouse as punishment and get them both killed. The second part still focuses on the cruelty and goriness of the meat industry, but has this second plotline layered carefully on top of it. Marcos increasingly teaches her what it means to be human again and takes care of her while she bears his child in secret, in spite of the rest of the world. It’s a bold rejection of the society that has been forced upon them.
But… Something irked me about the second part.
Jasmine, like all livestock, has her vocal cords cut out since “meat doesn’t talk” and has a child-like aspect to her since she never has experienced kindness - only fear has been taught to her. This blurs the lines of consent. She’s 22 canonically, but something doesn’t sit right with me.
While she is taught humanity and something is brought back to her now that she’s being cared for, there’s still this animalistic part that doesn’t allow her to be able to register a lot of the world around her. This love she carries for Marcos is just her reflecting what he gives her - but it also resembles the love and affection a pet has for its owner.
Take what you will. It’s something to consider when reading this book.
 The distant third-person limited narration sends chills down the reader’s spine, with a masterful translation done by translator Sarah Moses. We aren’t even sure of Marcos’s name until several chapters into the book, and even so, it’s only other characters referring to him by his name in dialogue. Even he isn’t a person because of how much this present has degraded him and stripped him of humanity, much like the “head”. The process dehumanizes not only its victims quite literally, but those participating and involved in the slaughter.
This book made me seriously consider vegetarianism or veganism for the first time. The author painstakingly made the process of slaughtering “special meat” so similar to the slaughter of pigs, cows, and other animals for consumption. Doing the mental swap of pigs and cows to humans puts things into perspective. 
This book is a damnation of not only the meat industry, but of society; society can adapt to the most cruel and awful things and completely disregard morals if it serves their desires and self-interest. Governments can also manipulate and distort the truth beyond the point of recognition - as the test of time through history has shown.
There’s also beauty in this destruction and in what once was - Marcos visits a zoo that has been torn apart when havoc wreaked after the “virus” broke out, and has memories of being young and going there with his father before the transition. Even after being chased out of the zoo by rabid, feral dogs after discovering four puppies, he calls them beautiful as he sits in his car and watches them from the window.
Refusing to pay attention to the atrocities in the book is a refusal to bear witness to the cruelty of humanity - innately, carnal desires run deep in our society, and this book hits close to home on what that carnage can lead us to. 
This book will never leave my mind.

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Chameleon in a Candy Store by Anonymous

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dark funny tense fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? No
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

Again, I liked "Diary of an Oxygen Thief". Not a ton, but a lot. 
To read things from the abuser's perspective was interesting. To have read books from the victims my whole life, and then to get this unapologetic abuser explaining what he did and how he enjoyed it… It was an experience, to say the least of it. Speaking from a victim of abuse as well, it didn't trigger me at all but not everyone's the same. I've been so desensitized to trauma that it doesn't faze me to read about it. 
Bottom line of that book, as far as you need to know, is the old cliche: Hurt people hurt people. It's absolutely true. Every time I've hurt people, it's when I'm hurting about something else in any situation. I can't think of a time I've ever hurt anyone without my own pain being the underlying reason why I hurt someone. You don't need to read the book to know that, of course, but from my experience, the book also gave me more perspective and added more nuance to that statement.
I think, in terms of judging "Chameleon in a Candy Store", I liked it more than its predecessor. And that's a pretty bold statement.
It felt more like a one-by-one account of his dates and his life, more like itemizing each woman that comes across in his life after the events of "Diary of an Oxygen Thief". 
I also appreciated the more-structured plot line this book had, rather than the unwarranted tangents and the sudden flashbacks the other book had in the middle of the central plot. Because he itemized each hookup and experience he had, it made the book easier to follow and it was just more pleasant and less stomach-churning. There was no part in this I had to read twice to fully understand.
The content was slightly toned down from the last book as well, which made it much easier to process. When you're constantly getting thrown really difficult topics or taboo topics, as an empath, it's hard to read without empathizing or really feeling for that person, no matter how awful they may be. Although, I will say, there are a lot of sex scenes that are pretty explicit… And I mean a lot. 
"Diary of an Oxygen Thief", probably for the right reasons, also got categorized as erotic literature because of its depictions. Wouldn't be surprised if this is taken as erotic literature moreso than a memoir.
Viewer (or reader) discretion is advised. I know most of my audience is minors - which is why I'd tell you to hold off on reading this book. I like writing about it just to pique your interest and if your parents are cool with you reading the book AND you're mature enough to handle it, I'd say go ahead. Otherwise, for the rest of you, hold off a little longer. It's for your own good.
It's funny how it takes the first page to really know whether I'm hooked on the book immediately or not. Because this book, signature to his last book, starts off rather boldly with a shocking first line that grabs you and pretty much tells you what the rest of the book is about.
"I knew if I wanted to have sex with a girl within the first three seconds of meeting her. After that, it was just a matter of how much I was willing to put up with to make it happen. This period of putting up with their bullshit is what women called charm." (1)
The narrator/author, using his experience in advertising for online dating. At first, it's to fuel his sex addiction and to come across women to use for his own pleasure. However, later in the book, he turns to the same platform to sell his book, "Diary of an Oxygen Thief". 
What never fails to stun me about the author is his cleverness and how sly he is about things. I consider myself sometimes witty or a smartass, sure, but the things this guy thinks of are crazy. It pretty much tells the story up to his current life right now, living in the East Village of New York City as a writer now. This book left me feeling not as upset as the last one did, for all the reasons I talked about earlier and its resolution.
My favorite parts of it though weren't really the story, but the cuts over to his ideas for commercials in the most random moments. Those always got a good chuckle and they were annotated in my book because I liked coming back to those and just reading them when I need a pick-me-up and I have the book in my room when I'm about to hit it for the night.
My stomach didn't churn that much in this book. I could eat and still not feel nauseous, you know? In fact, there were a few lines in there where I laughed or chuckled, so much so that the other patients in my treatment leaned over to look at what was so funny to me. I typically don't react much as a reader, but this book had more humorous parts. Or maybe, I learned the author's humor and appreciated it much more.
I'd only recommend this book if you've read "Diary of an Oxygen Thief" before. Otherwise, go read that first and if you can stand to read the sequel, which I do recommend, go ahead and read this book.

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The Secret History by Donna Tartt

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challenging dark emotional mysterious reflective sad tense slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

I feel like this book has single-handedly made me want to study the Classics in college or at least get back into Latin after losing motivation during COVID. Now, I am applying to be a Classics major after more consideration. At least I won't fall into the temptations of murder like these classics students did though.
Imagine if "Lord of the Flies" met dark academia, a classical tragedy, and Greek antiquity at a New England college.
I ate this book UP. I don't necessarily get intimidated by larger novels but I never have the time to read them, so I put them off. When I was in treatment, I finally had time to read this book after it sat on my shelf for a month at home.
One, the cover was aesthetically pleasing to me, because I strived for a dark academia aesthetic more around sophomore/beginning of junior year and I still admire the aesthetic. Studying antiquity at a small liberal arts college in Vermont? Say less.
Two, I'm a SUCKER for psychological novels. I'm not really into mysteries. I never really have been, I hate to say it. "Nancy Drew" wasn't my thing as a kid, I read a few "A to Z Mysteries", but nothing too special, and didn't really ever latch on to what my peers liked about it. I just didn't have the sustained interest in it, and it was probably because of my ADHD. 
But something about this book is so captivating and special. Words can't begin to describe it. 
This was my first Donna Tartt novel, and I'm definitely going to read "The Goldfinch" or "The Little Friend" now after so many years of people recommending me to her. I fell in love with her writing style - it reinvented English for me and the diction this book has is impeccable. I never had this much admiration for the lexicon in any book until this novel.
The reviews about it were outstanding, and I like reading the reviews, as a reviewer. How many times did I say a word that began with an R?
Back to talking about reviews though. The reviews give me some idea on what to expect from the novel, especially if I know the author or publication that's writing the review. 
If I were to ever write a book, I'd want the reviews that "The Secret History" got. Like, helloooo? Are you there, God? It's me, Izzy. 
If my comment about "Lord of the Flies" intimidates you, don't let it. I hated that book too. I thought it was so absolute in its judgment of a person's innate capability for evil and savagery, as if that's our ultimate nature, which I disagree with. I had a lot of moral objections to that book and I consider myself the president of the "Lord of the Flies" Hate Club. My least favorite book I've had to read, to say the least.
No offense to those who liked it or took meaning out of it - go enjoy your 12-year-olds killing each other on an island.
But I'll explain my reasoning for my comparison later, without giving away too much about the book.
The book follows the perspective of Richard Papen, a transfer student from California to the elite Hampden College in Vermont. He describes the very exclusive class of classics Professor Julian Morrow, and the eventual fall from grace of the students. He's writing this from years in retrospect, looking back at events leading up to the murder of Bunny, one of the classmates in Morrow's class, and the blurry, unbearable days following the murder. 
The common theme in my recommendations: Did it catch me from the first page? Answer: YES. This book absolutely caught my attention from the first page. 
It was slightly haunting to read the prologue, and I immediately fell in love with the book with the prologue's last poetic parts: "...Though I only remember too well the long terrible night that lay ahead and the long terrible days and nights that followed, I have only to glance over my shoulder for all those years to drop away and I see it behind me again, the ravine, rising all green and black through the saplings, a picture that will never leave me. I suppose at one time in my life I might have had any number of stories, but now there is no other. This is the only story I will be ever able to tell" (4).
The reason I absolutely devoured this book is because of the inverted murder mystery model and the ominous tone the book sets right in the prologue. It's sustained throughout the book through the characterization of the six students and their professor. 
The epilogue after the main story sent me for a loop after the ups and downs of the main story, and after I finished the book, I felt empty. To say I was in awe is a grievous understatement. I would read it again and again and never get bored of it. I went to the length of looking up if there was a movie adaptation of it so I could devour it again.
I've known people who read parts of books in the middle or the end. I'm guilty as charged sometimes. I try not to do it all the time, but that's what always ruins mysteries for me on top of reasons I stated earlier. 
However, I didn't with this book because I was so invested in the story. It takes a LOT of self-restraint but when you dive into a story and absorb yourself in it, you forget that it's ever going to end. That's how this book made me feel. It was at a good pace and was both lyrical and suspenseful. Erudite is often the word reviewers used and I have to agree - there was a level of sophistication to this book that doesn't make it unreadable. It adds this flare that no book I've ever read has.
At times, I couldn't put this book down. I just loved reading it, sipping on a warm cup of coffee with a little bit of sweet cream. Dimmer lighting might be a better match to the vibe of this book - this is definitely a book to read by candlelight. The vibes, needless to say, are immaculate.

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Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata

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funny lighthearted reflective medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

I originally came across this book when I was looking for new books during "Women in Translation" Month in August. It had a really cute cover that attracted me and being that I came across it on TikTok and had it recommended to me by a close friend, I had to buy it. 
The book, to briefly summarize, is about 36-year-old Keiko Furukawa, a woman who has worked at the Hiiromachi Station Smile Mart as a part-timer for 18 years. Always an outcast since she was young, she finally found a place to fit in. Through the store manual, she finally finds a way to conform to her peers. However, it seems like everyone else arounds her doesn't approve of this job where she's finally fitting in and where she's happy that she has some sense of purpose. She's never been in a relationship or had sex before and it doesn't faze her at all. People think she should have grown out of the job she has. There's some part about Keiko that needs "fixing", since she isn't married by now and has never had a job beyond this convenience store. But it shouldn't matter if she's content with it, right?
Now, to my opinions - I made a specific annotation about my book about the times I suspected Keiko is neurodivergent. As a neurodivergent person, there were behaviors that some of my neurodivergent friends have also described them having when they were younger. 
Then again, this isn't confirmed. Call it a "headcanon" of mine. 
However, it does seem canon, and a recurring topic with the author, that Keiko is asexual and has no desire for sex.
It's also, to my surprise, loosely based on the author's 18-year tenure through several convenience stores. Murata said in an interview with the New York Times, “For me, when I was working as a college student, I was a very shy girl. But at the stores, I was instructed to raise my voice and talk in a loud friendly voice, so I became that kind of active and lively person in that circumstance.”
One of the most strange, funny, endearing, and yet profound books I've ever read, "Convenience Store Woman" made its way into my heart, making a bold statement about society's expectations about single people, society's aversion from asexuality, and the embrace of the odd.

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Diary of an Oxygen Thief by Anonymous

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challenging dark mysterious tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Yes, I caved. I read one of the most unrecommended books out there. The curiosity was killing me to read it. 
And honestly? I don't regret reading it, as stomach-knotting as it was.
As the trigger warnings can tell you, it's one of the most vulgar books I've ever read. It's definitely up there with "American Psycho" by Bret Easton Ellis.
I feel like it's safe to compare the narrator/author to Patrick Bateman in some aspects, speaking of "American Psycho", except the narrator is much more in touch with the world around him and doesn't have an urge to *physically* hurt. But he does not have any true emotions like love or compassion for others, as well as struggling with alcoholism. He doesn't have much remorse for his actions either, as he clearly states in the first page.
The book, as people have probably heard, is most famous for its first lines: "I like hurting girls. Emotionally, not physically. I've never hit a girl in my life. Well, once. But that was a mistake. I'll tell you about it later. The thing is, I got off on it. I really enjoyed it." (1)
And news flash: I'm one of those readers who gets either pulled in immediately by the first page or just puts off reading the book until later if it doesn't captivate me or pique interest immediately.
I didn't enjoy the book because of its content. I'd be insane if I did, but not to say you are if you did enjoy the content (kind of…).
The sole reason I enjoyed it was because I'm someone who likes psychoanalyzing characters, even if the character is meant to be horrible. That's what brings fun back into the book for me and makes me be able to stand it. Otherwise, I'd probably be in the category of the faint-hearted that would hate this book because of how awful the content of it is. 
It's written well, once you get beyond the fact he's a rotten human being. I also just sat through the sex scenes and read them to get past them.
It is satisfying to get to the ending, although I wish he got more of what he deserved. I did have to read it twice to fully understand it but it left me with more questions - hence, my currently reading the sequel.
It rambles on at times and goes on tangents - it sometimes be difficult to understand or to keep track of the plot. However, insight into his mental state of mind made this book enjoyable and I wouldn't take out anything, except for a couple of churning depictions of hurting women or sex scenes I would have rather not read.
Do not eat if you're reading this book. It churned my stomach at some points and I definitely believe this book is not for everyone.

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