Reviews tagging 'Deadnaming'

Stay Gold by Tobly McSmith

93 reviews

michaelion's review against another edition

dark emotional funny hopeful informative inspiring tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

My ex bought me this for our one month anniversary and I finally read it two years later hoping the book would be bad so I could give it away but it was so good! So cue so sweet. I shall be keeping it.

I was so sure that The Outsiders wasn't canon in this world and then she mentioned it! It's nitpicky but naming yourself after Ponyboy is much cooler than just naming yourself after an animal randomly. That boy got to senior year and didn't read The Outsiders?! It's so gay he would've loved it.

A great book for explaining what a trans person is to kids / teens. It has a perfect mixture of people familiar with the world and explaining to someone who knows nothing. Great writing. I laughed a plenty.

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Blood, Homophobia, Injury/Injury detail, Lesbophobia, Physical abuse, Transphobia, Violence, and Outing

Moderate: Sexual violence, Vomit, Deadnaming, Sexual harassment, Bullying, Panic attacks/disorders, Toxic friendship, and Suicidal thoughts

Minor: Infidelity and Abandonment

readingwithkaitlyn's review against another edition

challenging fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexual assault, Deadnaming, Toxic friendship, Mental illness, Terminal illness, Misogyny, Hate crime, Body shaming, Dysphoria, Bullying, Emotional abuse, Lesbophobia, Violence, Injury/Injury detail, Outing, and Transphobia

Moderate: Infidelity, Toxic relationship, Child abuse, Sexual harassment, Alcohol, Drug use, Suicidal thoughts, Death, and Medical content

Minor: Child death, Alcoholism, Suicide, Physical abuse, Self harm, Murder, Excrement, Sexual content, Biphobia, Fire/Fire injury, Death, and Vomit

use of f slur

grace_koalateareads's review against another edition

challenging emotional funny hopeful informative tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

“We can’t change those people’s minds. We just love louder and harder than they can hate.”

Stay Gold by Tobly McSmith was a difficult  yet important read. The story is split into Pony’s (a trans boy) and Georgia’s (a cis girl) point of view. Both are seniors at a Texas high school just outside of Dallas. For Pony it’s all about going “stealth” and just being a normal guy, for Georgia it’s about cheerleading and being the person people expect her to be. I loved both of them so much, they had great personalities and felt real and genuine. I loved the puns, the banter and the deep and meaningful conversations. 

“When the school treats trans students like they’re different, it gives the green light for the other kids to do the same, but kids are way meaner.”

The side characters were where my discomfort started, especially with Max, Pony’s “out and proud” best friend, who came across very “black and white” and wanting him to share things on social media that made him feel uncomfortable. I know the ending sort of cleared those things up, but it felt too rushed and too shiny (or gold, if you will) like it wasn’t real.  Being “out and proud” is great, it’s awesome, but not if it isn’t safe to do so. It also made me uncomfortable with the amount of trans and queer slurs, especially as they didn’t need to be written down to get the point across.

“Some days, I barely think about being trans. And other days, it’s an obstacle course.”

Don’t get me wrong, I did enjoy the book, just not as much as I was expecting. A lot of really heavy topics were covered, such as transphobia, misgendering and forced outting - these weren’t the reason for my lower rating, but more how they were handled/written especially when a character was the one causing said topics. I was definitely hooked and finished the book in just over a day. It’s one that I think a lot of people, who don’t understand what being trans means, should read, however, overall it just made me feel drained.

“I raise my glass in toast and say (but not too loudly, “Here’s to being trans in Texas.””

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Transphobia, Violence, Hate crime, Homophobia, Toxic friendship, Dysphoria, Suicidal thoughts, Outing, Emotional abuse, and Deadnaming

Moderate: Toxic relationship, Lesbophobia, Injury/Injury detail, and Bullying

Minor: Alcoholism, Alcohol, Body shaming, Medical content, Vomit, Drug use, and Grief

loiseigenraam's review against another edition

dark emotional funny informative inspiring sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

I really appreciate this book for the story it tells, but it being a YA story I'm just 'too old' to really appreciate the teenage drama that is going on in the book. Things like the prank war between the football team and the cheerleading squad or the 'jokes' Georgia made really had me rolling my eyes. 

 

Besides that, I did enjoy the book and the story. I found it very interesting, and heart wrenching, to see the world through a transgender boy's eyes. I really liked Pony as a character too. Lets just not talk about his name though... I also sobbed my eyes out ofc. I agree with all the reviews saying this book should come with trigger warnings. Please look those up if you have any triggers before you read this book. 

 

I definitely recommend this book for the transgender POV and learning more about that. And if you're a younger reader, you might also enjoy the whole story around that too. 

 

Something that annoyed me very much was Pony's friend Max. I understand him wanting Pony to be out and proud and wanting him to be an advocate. But as someone who’s gone through the same process and is also a receiver of transphobia and harassment, you’d think he’d have more of an understanding towards Pony’s hesitation to be out and would kindly nudge him in the right direction while respecting his choices and his personal timeline, instead of actually putting an ultimatum on their friendship.

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Physical abuse, Bullying, Transphobia, Sexual assault, and Violence

Moderate: Suicidal thoughts, Emotional abuse, and Homophobia

Minor: Deadnaming

wrinnola's review

emotional hopeful lighthearted reflective fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Violence, Bullying, Emotional abuse, Transphobia, Body shaming, and Hate crime

Moderate: Cursing, Domestic abuse, Bullying, Deadnaming, Lesbophobia, Outing, Dysphoria, Homophobia, and Suicidal thoughts

Minor: Vomit, Toxic friendship, Mental illness, Drug use, Sexual assault, and Sexual violence

ian_loves_dragons's review

dark emotional hopeful medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

2.5

The main cis-trans romance in this book could be described as “why I’m t4t,” except we’re supposed to root for them to be together 

-sincerely, a frustrated trans person 

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Medical content, Violence, Suicidal thoughts, Hate crime, Dysphoria, Homophobia, Transphobia, Emotional abuse, and Lesbophobia

Moderate: Death, Deadnaming, and Suicide

maxmaxmax's review against another edition

emotional hopeful informative inspiring sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Plot
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.25

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Dysphoria, Sexual harassment, Sexual assault, Hate crime, Physical abuse, Medical trauma, Deadnaming, Toxic friendship, Bullying, Child abuse, Medical content, Homophobia, Injury/Injury detail, Outing, and Suicidal thoughts

luxxltyd's review against another edition

emotional inspiring reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Dysphoria, Sexual violence, Transphobia, Violence, Hate crime, and Outing

Moderate: Suicidal thoughts, Homophobia, Lesbophobia, and Deadnaming

whosfernn's review against another edition

challenging emotional hopeful inspiring medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

I knew almost nothing about this book when I picked it up. Looking at the cover and the blurb, I assumed it would be a cute coming-of-age romance. What it actually is is probably the best, most moving tale of a trans boy I've ever read. It's a very realistic look at the trans experience, especially how it can be to be trans in southern America. Beautiful. One of my favourites, probably my favourite read of 2023 so far. Please read this book.

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Deadnaming, Injury/Injury detail, Toxic friendship, Transphobia, Medical content, Outing, Suicidal thoughts, Violence, Death, Drug use, Lesbophobia, and Homophobia

Moderate: Alcohol, Mental illness, Infidelity, Abandonment, and Bullying

Minor: Body shaming, Emotional abuse, Alcoholism, Grief, and Religious bigotry

journey2's review

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

Sometimes I need to take my own advice. If you are not loving a book...it's okay to quit it. And you probably should. 
 But I wanted to see how it ended. 

~☆~ minor spoilers~☆~ 

Stay Gold was not a good read for me. I found this book frustrating. The characters annoyed me and everyone seemed extremely superficial. 

Pony is relentless about the "friend zone" thing with Georgia. She continues to say no to his advances and he continues to pursue. Yes, she likes him, but she has clearly said no and he will not give up and keeps asking for more; including love bombing her with a grand gesture, until he can eventually win her over. 

Our main love interest, Georgia, is so obsessed with her image and social standing right til nearly the end and her change of heart is supposed to be endearing, but by the time we got there I was just so tired of how fake she was. 

I know that in high school everybody's figuring out who they are and who they want to be, but absolutely every character was so fake and two dimensional. In the end, superficial apologies and excuses like "it's just locker room talk" etc seem to 'fix' every off-colour comment or remark. Pony's dad was absolutely horrible to him throughout the entire book and his mom was kind of just complacent and didn't fight for him. A couple sentences at the very end of the book are supposed to redeem him but they just felt forced. Even though lots of things ended up being happy or at least happier, I found this book extremely problematic, frustrating and annoying and I do not recommend it. 

I'm curious as to what the purpose of the storyline about Pony's job served. It didn't really go anywhere except to allow Pony to be nosy and intrusive into somebody else's business and then he got to have a warm fuzzy feeling afterwards. On that note, Pony continued to stick his nose into business that is not his own and it was very annoying. There was a time when Pony and Georgia stuck their noses into something so personal that I actually took time away from the book because I was  exasperated. He was rewarded for it eventually, but it was annoying to read. 

This book was 100% not for me and was just completely filled with red flags.
 I could go on, but I won't! 

Also it's list of trigger warnings is a mile long

 

---

Content Warnings

Moderate: Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Terminal illness, Outing, Rape, Sexual violence, Deadnaming, Suicide attempt, Transphobia, Bullying, Cursing, Death, Hate crime, Homophobia, Sexual assault, Sexual harassment, and Drug use