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emotional
funny
sad
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
challenging
dark
emotional
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
N/A
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
fast-paced
4 ⭐️
Beautiful story about a couple who grew to love eachother, lose eachother and then finding one another again. Story about grief and guilt. Hero redemption for stealing her song was a long road but worth it in the end. Heroine dealing with her body image was inspiring.
Beautiful story about a couple who grew to love eachother, lose eachother and then finding one another again. Story about grief and guilt. Hero redemption for stealing her song was a long road but worth it in the end. Heroine dealing with her body image was inspiring.
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
sad
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
N/A
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
2.5 Stars
Oh man, where to even begin.
The first 30% of this I was so on board. The way the relationship between them started and developed at the beginning had me rooting for them so hard. The way they were vulnerable with each other and the way they genuinely became friends was so sweet and swoony. So the majority of my rating is for the beginning.
Then on to the things I didn't like. (Unfortunately there is a list)
2. WHY did he have to make Lennon believe he slept with Sabrina?? He never gives a reason for that, it felt like it was just drama thrown in for the sake of drama.
3. I'm sorry man, but I could not get behind these characters, the fact that Phoenix could not just apologize for the longest time and Lennon bouncing between hate and not hate for Phoenix was giving me whiplash. This tumultuous relationship had me genuinely confused, how are these two going to go forward. And this back and forth went on until the very end, which is super duper frustrating in a 700 page book.
Don't get me wrong, I love me some angst but the payoff didn't really make the journey worth it for me. I didn't hate this by any means and I really hope this story works for others but it just didn't do it for me
Oh man, where to even begin.
The first 30% of this I was so on board. The way the relationship between them started and developed at the beginning had me rooting for them so hard. The way they were vulnerable with each other and the way they genuinely became friends was so sweet and swoony. So the majority of my rating is for the beginning.
Then on to the things I didn't like. (Unfortunately there is a list)
Spoiler
1. Why in the hell, and this was bugging me for a BIG part of the book, did Phoenix not just ASK her for the song. Like okay, I get it there was limited time and yeah there was a chance she would have said no, but the fact that he also on top of that made her believe he had sex with Sabrina was the biggest "What the hell" to the point of me wondering if there was some sort of master plan involved. Which brings me to...2. WHY did he have to make Lennon believe he slept with Sabrina?? He never gives a reason for that, it felt like it was just drama thrown in for the sake of drama.
3. I'm sorry man, but I could not get behind these characters, the fact that Phoenix could not just apologize for the longest time and Lennon bouncing between hate and not hate for Phoenix was giving me whiplash. This tumultuous relationship had me genuinely confused, how are these two going to go forward. And this back and forth went on until the very end, which is super duper frustrating in a 700 page book.
Don't get me wrong, I love me some angst but the payoff didn't really make the journey worth it for me. I didn't hate this by any means and I really hope this story works for others but it just didn't do it for me
adventurous
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
inspiring
tense
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Wow. This book, this story, is going to stay with me for a long time. And probably not in as good of a way as I’d like. When I first started reading this book, I was tempted several times to set it aside. I didn’t want to DNF per’se, but I struggled with some triggers. There was negative self talk, binge eating, weight related bullying from the mean girls to the FMC Lennon, culminating in the pig slop incident. It brought back memories of being pelted with rotten garbage while standing outside the gym waiting for my date for the Sadie Hawkins Dance. Only he, and the other cool kids, were the ones throwing rotten vegetables at me. Needless to say, I cried along with the Lennon character and felt every bit of her horrific embarrassment and hurt.
But I kept reading because by that point, I was invested. And a little piece of me wanted to see where the author was going to take the story. Especially when it looked like Phoenix was actually having feelings for Lennon, despite his protests to his friend that she wasn’t “his type” and he wasn’t “attracted to her that way.” Ugh. I’m normally very attracted to the bad boy characters, or the men who are considered “morally gray.” Phoenix wasn’t gray…I think his heart was encased in some kind of black ice until I read the last 25% of the book where he admitted how badly he messed up and how he regretted it.
Phoenix and Lennon aren’t your typical HEA couple. They’re both really dysfunctional, and codependent. His singular focus kept him from learning important life lessons. Ones he only learned after he stole Lennox’s song and purposefully shattered her heart by implying he was cheating on her with the head mean girl, Sabrina. He learned more after he was the only survivor of a wreck that killed his friend Josh, a pregnant woman and her four year old son. A wreck he blamed himself for because he was so drunk and high, he allowed his friend Josh to drive and Josh was even more drunk and high than he was. This was one book I was not looking for a HEA from…I *wanted* Lennon to take her revenge. Phoenix sure did go through one huge transformative arc.
Lennon was more sympathetic than Phoenix, but she was a mess. The author must have some experience with eating disorders, though, because her descriptions of Lennons actions and her inner dialogue were accurate. A little too accurate for my comfort. This was quite triggering to me. Others i know who’ve read it mentioned that the weight loss Lennon experienced (from the descriptions of high school Lennon, I’d say she was a 16/18) was triggering. She went down to a size 10/12, which as one reviewer said doesn’t really constitute a plus size character, which the novel is billed as having, but is still double digits and considered fat by a lot of people’s standards. The weight loss seemed like a natural side effect of her working on her mental health and relationship with food, so I didn’t judge it too harshly.
Lennon’s character frustrated me, though. She had a fiery temper, and a resolve that seemed to be made of steel one minute, only to turn into a spineless pushover the next. She basically allowed him and his little blonde friend to rape her, but it was okay because she enjoyed it. I get that Phoenix is forceful and pushy, it aligns with his character, but there are some instances where consent was not as clearly defined as it should be in this era of #metoo. Lennon’s character arc was not as steep as Phoenix’s, but she grew and it all worked out in the end.
All in all, the story was well told, the spice was hot as hell, and all the characters were engaging and multi-dimensional. That’s why I gave the book five stars. I only wish the author would give better trigger warnings and if I do recommend the book to anyone (and who are we kidding, I know I will) I’ll ensure to give them a heads up. I’m old and have dealt (mostly) with my demons, but someone far younger might have to at least be prepared for some of the more controversial parts of the storyline.
But I kept reading because by that point, I was invested. And a little piece of me wanted to see where the author was going to take the story. Especially when it looked like Phoenix was actually having feelings for Lennon, despite his protests to his friend that she wasn’t “his type” and he wasn’t “attracted to her that way.” Ugh. I’m normally very attracted to the bad boy characters, or the men who are considered “morally gray.” Phoenix wasn’t gray…I think his heart was encased in some kind of black ice until I read the last 25% of the book where he admitted how badly he messed up and how he regretted it.
Phoenix and Lennon aren’t your typical HEA couple. They’re both really dysfunctional, and codependent. His singular focus kept him from learning important life lessons. Ones he only learned after he stole Lennox’s song and purposefully shattered her heart by implying he was cheating on her with the head mean girl, Sabrina. He learned more after he was the only survivor of a wreck that killed his friend Josh, a pregnant woman and her four year old son. A wreck he blamed himself for because he was so drunk and high, he allowed his friend Josh to drive and Josh was even more drunk and high than he was. This was one book I was not looking for a HEA from…I *wanted* Lennon to take her revenge. Phoenix sure did go through one huge transformative arc.
Lennon was more sympathetic than Phoenix, but she was a mess. The author must have some experience with eating disorders, though, because her descriptions of Lennons actions and her inner dialogue were accurate. A little too accurate for my comfort. This was quite triggering to me. Others i know who’ve read it mentioned that the weight loss Lennon experienced (from the descriptions of high school Lennon, I’d say she was a 16/18) was triggering. She went down to a size 10/12, which as one reviewer said doesn’t really constitute a plus size character, which the novel is billed as having, but is still double digits and considered fat by a lot of people’s standards. The weight loss seemed like a natural side effect of her working on her mental health and relationship with food, so I didn’t judge it too harshly.
Lennon’s character frustrated me, though. She had a fiery temper, and a resolve that seemed to be made of steel one minute, only to turn into a spineless pushover the next. She basically allowed him and his little blonde friend to rape her, but it was okay because she enjoyed it. I get that Phoenix is forceful and pushy, it aligns with his character, but there are some instances where consent was not as clearly defined as it should be in this era of #metoo. Lennon’s character arc was not as steep as Phoenix’s, but she grew and it all worked out in the end.
All in all, the story was well told, the spice was hot as hell, and all the characters were engaging and multi-dimensional. That’s why I gave the book five stars. I only wish the author would give better trigger warnings and if I do recommend the book to anyone (and who are we kidding, I know I will) I’ll ensure to give them a heads up. I’m old and have dealt (mostly) with my demons, but someone far younger might have to at least be prepared for some of the more controversial parts of the storyline.
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
sad
tense
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes