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emily_mh's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
3.25
I don't know how to rate and review this, but here goes. The mental health rep here was handled really well. It portrayed anxiety and depression realistically; meds didn't work perfectly, Ben initially had an aversion to both therapy and medication, and their recovery wasn't linear. I also thought the nuance that Deaver brought to Ben and Hannah's relationship was good. I appreciated that they showed how Hannah wasn't necessarily in the wrong, but Ben could still be hurt by her actions. There wasn't much plot, but I still enjoyed reading it because it was super cathartic seeing Ben start to heal. I think they come a long way by the end of the book.
On the other hand, I think some other rep and information was not done well. For example, I really wish Nathan had been fleshed out as a character. It kind of felt like Deaver took the stereotypical "golden retriever" LI archetype and left it at that, giving him no motivations or desires unrelated to Ben. While it was obvious Ben and Nathan had a connection, one I was rooting for, it still felt like I barely knew Nathan. This is the book's biggest issue, because I think it is an example of the situation that readers and reviewers of the global majority have been pointing out for ages, where white authors write a LI of the global majority whose only purpose in the book is to assist the white MC in their development. If I am wrong here or out of my lane, I will fully delete this review. I wanted to flag it in case I wasn't.
On top of this, the book presents some misinformation about being gay, ace, and aro. It implies that a nonbinary person like Ben cannot be gay because being gay is about being attracted to the same gender, and as Ben doesn't have a gender, they cannot experience same-gender attraction. In reality, being gay is simply about non-women being attracted to non-women. This is the quote I am referring to:
"And besides, I don’t exactly have a gender, and being gay implies being interested in the same gender."
It also implies that to be ace or aro is to be touch averse, when only some aces and aros are touch averse - it's this very piece of misinformation that means so many aces and aros don't realise they are asexual or aromantic for ages. Literally a simple "some" in this sentence would have fixed this misinformation:
“'Touch aversion can be common in people who deal with panic attacks, or people dealing with anxiety. In fact, there are some people who are just born or develop that way, like asexual or aromantic people.'”
So, yeah. Do with this what you will.
Rep: bisexual NB MC, bisexual LI of the global majority (ethnicity not explicitly stated), Bahraini Shia Muslim pansexual NB SC, Chinese-American SC, SC of the global majority (Ben's therapist Dr. Taylor, whose ethnicity is also not explicitly stated), Black SC (implied, ethnicity not explicitly stated), Korean-American SC with ADHD
On the other hand, I think some other rep and information was not done well. For example, I really wish Nathan had been fleshed out as a character. It kind of felt like Deaver took the stereotypical "golden retriever" LI archetype and left it at that, giving him no motivations or desires unrelated to Ben. While it was obvious Ben and Nathan had a connection, one I was rooting for, it still felt like I barely knew Nathan. This is the book's biggest issue, because I think it is an example of the situation that readers and reviewers of the global majority have been pointing out for ages, where white authors write a LI of the global majority whose only purpose in the book is to assist the white MC in their development. If I am wrong here or out of my lane, I will fully delete this review. I wanted to flag it in case I wasn't.
On top of this, the book presents some misinformation about being gay, ace, and aro. It implies that a nonbinary person like Ben cannot be gay because being gay is about being attracted to the same gender, and as Ben doesn't have a gender, they cannot experience same-gender attraction. In reality, being gay is simply about non-women being attracted to non-women. This is the quote I am referring to:
"And besides, I don’t exactly have a gender, and being gay implies being interested in the same gender."
It also implies that to be ace or aro is to be touch averse, when only some aces and aros are touch averse - it's this very piece of misinformation that means so many aces and aros don't realise they are asexual or aromantic for ages. Literally a simple "some" in this sentence would have fixed this misinformation:
“'Touch aversion can be common in people who deal with panic attacks, or people dealing with anxiety. In fact, there are some people who are just born or develop that way, like asexual or aromantic people.'”
So, yeah. Do with this what you will.
Rep: bisexual NB MC, bisexual LI of the global majority (ethnicity not explicitly stated), Bahraini Shia Muslim pansexual NB SC, Chinese-American SC, SC of the global majority (Ben's therapist Dr. Taylor, whose ethnicity is also not explicitly stated), Black SC (implied, ethnicity not explicitly stated), Korean-American SC with ADHD
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, and Transphobia
Moderate: Abandonment and Cursing
Minor: Ableism, Alcohol, Death, Physical abuse, Drug use, Medical content, Misogyny, Outing, Pregnancy, Sexual content, Domestic abuse, Injury/Injury detail, Islamophobia, Sexual assault, Homophobia, Suicidal thoughts, and Vomit
Major: disownment, misgendering (mostly uninformed as Ben isn't out to most people) Moderate: body dysmorphia Minor: one implied use of the transphobic t-slur, suicidal ideation, off-page use of the homophobic f-slur, 1 HP reference, menstruationtheuncannydani's review against another edition
emotional
inspiring
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Dysphoria, Abandonment, Emotional abuse, and Transphobia
Moderate: Cursing and Sexism
Minor: Domestic abuse, Child abuse, and Violence
nitzanschwarz's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
4.75
(A) 93% | Excellent
I absolutely loved this book.
Just the other day, I had a conversation with my mother, and she ended up scoffing and telling me “No one is really scared of coming out anymore”. I cannot describe to you how upset I was with her for that sentence because here is a grown woman failing to understand that we are insanely fortunate to be part of the circle we are in, and it’s not representative of the world in no shape or form. We are lucky to live in an environment where my aunt can accept my gay cousin despite being fairly conservative because loving her child and wishing for her happiness comes before anything else.
I want my mother to read this book. I want her to experience the anxiety, trauma, and fear that is still associated with coming out. I’m putting this here because I don’t want to ever forget. Because I think it’s so, so important to acknowledge that we are the fortunate ones for having accepting people in our lives who chose their love for their family, friends, and significant others over tradition, religion, or whatever the f people may use to reject others simply for not falling within their narrow definition of “normal”.
With that out of the way, let’s get to the review. P.S. if at any point in the review I misgender Ben, please let me know 🙏
Plot – 20/20
There are two words I’d use to describe this story: messy and wholesome. And let me be clear, it’s not the story’s structure or build or anything like that that’s messy, but a story about a non-binary kid having to face the fact the world is unfair and not everyone will accept you—even the people who are supposed to be contractually obligated to love you no matter what—cannot be clean or clear cut. Ben feels like a real teenager, and everything they know is pretty much destroyed in one single evening, and it’s messy. Dealing with the fallout is messy. The emotions that bloom from the rejection are messy. The attempt to pick yourself up—or convivence yourself you even should, is messy.
But while it’s messy, it’s also incredibly hopeful and wholesome. Because while Ben’s journey definitely hasn’t ended by the end of the book, you get the feeling they will definitely get there. That you can breathe easy because you don’t have to worry anymore, Ben’s got it in the bag. Some books you close and you feel the urge to yell at the author for a sequel because you’re still a little bit worried about your disaster children, but for me, I Wish You All the Best isn’t one of them. While I won’t bemoan a sequel, perhaps a novel in the same universe but starring different characters, I also don’t feel like I need it. I Wish You All the Best feels complete.
Characters – 20/20
The book hinges on you resonating with Ben, and I think it works really well. You really feel their stress, anxiety, and depression. You will want to hug them during the story and tell them everything will be okay. You will find yourself wishing them all the best.
Ben really felt like a teenager, with all the contradictions and irrationalities that come with it. Here is a kid who not only has to deal with normal teenage stuff like school, homework, and shudder relationships, but also has to deal with some stuff no one should have to go through. So they’re contradictory, and (I’ve said this word about a thousand times in this review) messy. They’re bitter about things they know are illogical. They get upset when their brain tells them they shouldn’t be because their friends have no way of knowing. They want to get better and at the same time they just… can’t deal right now.
And boy, how I relate to just not being able to deal.
Then there is Nathan, and not gonna lie – I’m slightly in love with him, so I’m hardly shocked Ben is. This kid is funny, sweet, and charming. He’s always pushing for Ben to talk a little more, try something new, commit to something that scares them, etc. But he never crosses the line. Whenever Ben tells him to stop, listen, or just let them breathe, Nathan does. And if that doesn’t turn you on, I might not want to talk to you lol.
Relationships – 18/20
The first major relationship, perhaps the most important one, is the familial relationship between Ben, their sister Hannah and their parents. It’s the most important one because this is the source of Ben’s trauma, and what they need to, not exactly come to terms with, but reach a point where it no longer holds them hostage. I definitely enjoyed the book’s portrayal of this relationship, because you get to see two things. With Hannah, you get to see how it’s possible to mend broken relationships, while with the parents you get to see how you don’t have to forgive. Forgiveness is not mandatory, and you don’t owe it to anyone—even the people who raised you. I think this is such an important message.
The second most important relationship is Ben and Nathan’s. This one would give you butterflies and make you all warm and fuzzy, especially at the end. I know I said this book doesn’t need a sequel, but if Deaver chooses to give me a book compiled of just scenes of these two bantering and going on dates, with no plot or conflict, I would squeal with joy. Ben and Nathan’s relationship is not instant, nor is it perfect. But it’s so so healing. Nathan is an important and integral part of Ben’s journey because he helps them smile, he’s always there for them, and having that person is so important. Nathan is first and foremost Ben’s friend, and to me, that’s just beautiful.
Then there are the simple friendships. First, let me say that the friendship between Ben, Nathan, Sophie, and Meleika was just great and felt so genuine. They felt like real teenagers—and witty teenagers at that. I really enjoyed their friendship, and moreover, I enjoyed the kind of “corrective experience” that they provide over Ben’s previous school experience. The only reason I deducted points for this section is that I feel that Mariam, Ben’s best friend, and an internet personality, was kind of underutilized. I didn’t feel like we got to “see” them enough or experience their close friendship with Ben despite their relationship being described as being so pivotal for Ben. Part of it is because most of what we experience of Miriam is over text messages, and I feel like that kind of puts a lot of distance between the reader and their character.
The final notable relationship is Ben and their therapist. I absolutely love what the book did with Dr. Taylor and how it described her role in Ben’s journey while destigmatizing therapy and seeking help. Ben starts the relationship very much on the defensive but ends it in such a positive place. It was really nice seeing this relationship develop over time and I feel like a lot of people may find this depiction helpful in deciding to seek their very own Dr. Taylor. There is no shame in therapy, and it can be so very helpful. From my personal experience, it’s not always such an “easy” transition. Ben really lucked out, finding the right one on the first try, as the book points out too, but when you do find it… 10/10 would recommend it.
writing – 15/20
I don’t have much to say about it, to be honest. It did its job—to tell Ben’s story in a way that enables the reader to connect with Ben’s journey and struggles. But I also don’t think it stands out from the crowd. The reason this book is so good is the story, not the writing style. That's not a demerit against the book, exactly. This writing style definitely enabled me to just sink into Ben and their character. But full score on this section is reserved for the books whose writing style makes me just pause in awe. As you can see, this didn't stop me from rating the book as a 5 star on Goodreads, it's just for my personal scale
Reading Experience – 20/20
This reading experience has been like no other. The book really gets you inside Ben’s mind, and as such, you start to feel things with them. I found myself looking for when people misgendered them, even though they couldn’t help it because Ben had not come out to them. But you will have these moments, which should be good moments, and then they’ll be marred by gender-specific wording. And I found myself feeling the pain alongside Ben, learning a lot, and rethinking how I view some things because words that seem harmless or even good, can be hurtful.
I absolutely loved this book.
Just the other day, I had a conversation with my mother, and she ended up scoffing and telling me “No one is really scared of coming out anymore”. I cannot describe to you how upset I was with her for that sentence because here is a grown woman failing to understand that we are insanely fortunate to be part of the circle we are in, and it’s not representative of the world in no shape or form. We are lucky to live in an environment where my aunt can accept my gay cousin despite being fairly conservative because loving her child and wishing for her happiness comes before anything else.
I want my mother to read this book. I want her to experience the anxiety, trauma, and fear that is still associated with coming out. I’m putting this here because I don’t want to ever forget. Because I think it’s so, so important to acknowledge that we are the fortunate ones for having accepting people in our lives who chose their love for their family, friends, and significant others over tradition, religion, or whatever the f people may use to reject others simply for not falling within their narrow definition of “normal”.
With that out of the way, let’s get to the review. P.S. if at any point in the review I misgender Ben, please let me know 🙏
Plot – 20/20
There are two words I’d use to describe this story: messy and wholesome. And let me be clear, it’s not the story’s structure or build or anything like that that’s messy, but a story about a non-binary kid having to face the fact the world is unfair and not everyone will accept you—even the people who are supposed to be contractually obligated to love you no matter what—cannot be clean or clear cut. Ben feels like a real teenager, and everything they know is pretty much destroyed in one single evening, and it’s messy. Dealing with the fallout is messy. The emotions that bloom from the rejection are messy. The attempt to pick yourself up—or convivence yourself you even should, is messy.
But while it’s messy, it’s also incredibly hopeful and wholesome. Because while Ben’s journey definitely hasn’t ended by the end of the book, you get the feeling they will definitely get there. That you can breathe easy because you don’t have to worry anymore, Ben’s got it in the bag. Some books you close and you feel the urge to yell at the author for a sequel because you’re still a little bit worried about your disaster children, but for me, I Wish You All the Best isn’t one of them. While I won’t bemoan a sequel, perhaps a novel in the same universe but starring different characters, I also don’t feel like I need it. I Wish You All the Best feels complete.
Characters – 20/20
The book hinges on you resonating with Ben, and I think it works really well. You really feel their stress, anxiety, and depression. You will want to hug them during the story and tell them everything will be okay. You will find yourself wishing them all the best.
Ben really felt like a teenager, with all the contradictions and irrationalities that come with it. Here is a kid who not only has to deal with normal teenage stuff like school, homework, and shudder relationships, but also has to deal with some stuff no one should have to go through. So they’re contradictory, and (I’ve said this word about a thousand times in this review) messy. They’re bitter about things they know are illogical. They get upset when their brain tells them they shouldn’t be because their friends have no way of knowing. They want to get better and at the same time they just… can’t deal right now.
And boy, how I relate to just not being able to deal.
Then there is Nathan, and not gonna lie – I’m slightly in love with him, so I’m hardly shocked Ben is. This kid is funny, sweet, and charming. He’s always pushing for Ben to talk a little more, try something new, commit to something that scares them, etc. But he never crosses the line. Whenever Ben tells him to stop, listen, or just let them breathe, Nathan does. And if that doesn’t turn you on, I might not want to talk to you lol.
Relationships – 18/20
The first major relationship, perhaps the most important one, is the familial relationship between Ben, their sister Hannah and their parents. It’s the most important one because this is the source of Ben’s trauma, and what they need to, not exactly come to terms with, but reach a point where it no longer holds them hostage. I definitely enjoyed the book’s portrayal of this relationship, because you get to see two things.
The second most important relationship is Ben and Nathan’s. This one would give you butterflies and make you all warm and fuzzy, especially at the end. I know I said this book doesn’t need a sequel, but if Deaver chooses to give me a book compiled of just scenes of these two bantering and going on dates, with no plot or conflict, I would squeal with joy. Ben and Nathan’s relationship is not instant, nor is it perfect. But it’s so so healing. Nathan is an important and integral part of Ben’s journey because he helps them smile, he’s always there for them, and having that person is so important. Nathan is first and foremost Ben’s friend, and to me, that’s just beautiful.
Then there are the simple friendships. First, let me say that the friendship between Ben, Nathan, Sophie, and Meleika was just great and felt so genuine. They felt like real teenagers—and witty teenagers at that. I really enjoyed their friendship, and moreover, I enjoyed the kind of “corrective experience” that they provide over Ben’s previous school experience. The only reason I deducted points for this section is that I feel that Mariam, Ben’s best friend, and an internet personality, was kind of underutilized. I didn’t feel like we got to “see” them enough or experience their close friendship with Ben despite their relationship being described as being so pivotal for Ben. Part of it is because most of what we experience of Miriam is over text messages, and I feel like that kind of puts a lot of distance between the reader and their character.
The final notable relationship is Ben and their therapist. I absolutely love what the book did with Dr. Taylor and how it described her role in Ben’s journey while destigmatizing therapy and seeking help. Ben starts the relationship very much on the defensive but ends it in such a positive place. It was really nice seeing this relationship develop over time and I feel like a lot of people may find this depiction helpful in deciding to seek their very own Dr. Taylor. There is no shame in therapy, and it can be so very helpful. From my personal experience, it’s not always such an “easy” transition. Ben really lucked out, finding the right one on the first try, as the book points out too, but when you do find it… 10/10 would recommend it.
writing – 15/20
I don’t have much to say about it, to be honest. It did its job—to tell Ben’s story in a way that enables the reader to connect with Ben’s journey and struggles. But I also don’t think it stands out from the crowd. The reason this book is so good is the story, not the writing style. That's not a demerit against the book, exactly. This writing style definitely enabled me to just sink into Ben and their character. But full score on this section is reserved for the books whose writing style makes me just pause in awe. As you can see, this didn't stop me from rating the book as a 5 star on Goodreads, it's just for my personal scale
Reading Experience – 20/20
This reading experience has been like no other. The book really gets you inside Ben’s mind, and as such, you start to feel things with them. I found myself looking for when people misgendered them, even though they couldn’t help it because Ben had not come out to them. But you will have these moments, which should be good moments, and then they’ll be marred by gender-specific wording. And I found myself feeling the pain alongside Ben, learning a lot, and rethinking how I view some things because words that seem harmless or even good, can be hurtful.
”My god, man, I could kiss you.”
My heart sort of sinks in my chest. “Yeah”.
This book even got me thinking beyond the scope of its story, into real life and what non-binary experience might be like where I live because our language itself is gendered. You cannot disassociate yourself from gender, no matter how much you may feel it doesn’t represent you. “They/them” in my language can be either male or female, and you must choose. What may that feel like? Will you be okay with it because this is the language you’ve grown up with, or will it amplify the dissonance you feel? I am now itching to find books by non-binary authors from local authors and reading their perspectives.
Final Score: 93
Content Warnings
Moderate: Homophobia and Domestic abuse
levtolstoy's review against another edition
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.0
I loved this story. I could relate to most of Ben's feelings and sometimes it made their anxiety flare-ups all to real. Ben's and Hannah's relationship was very interesting to follow. But I think that there could've been more on their relationship with their parents. All in all a good book.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Cursing, Homophobia, and Transphobia
Moderate: Domestic abuse
leni_cant's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
relaxing
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia, Mental illness, Emotional abuse, Toxic relationship, Panic attacks/disorders, and Abandonment
Moderate: Physical abuse and Dysphoria
Minor: Medical content, Gaslighting, Alcohol, Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Vomit, Hate crime, and Injury/Injury detail
luananki's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
i cannot thank mason deaver enough for writing this book. i can’t put into words how much i appreciate ben’s story and all the characters that came with it. the amount of representation in this book is incredible, i loved it so much.
ben is an amazing protagonist. i related to them a lot and i was crying and laughing and screaming because this book is so so important.
have to say i was a bit worried at first that it would just be another heartbreaking queer story but it’s not and i’m very happy about that.
forever thankful for this book, i loved every page of it
Content Warnings
Graphic: Homophobia, Transphobia, Abandonment, Alcohol, Mental illness, and Panic attacks/disorders
Moderate: Physical abuse, Religious bigotry, Dysphoria, Medical content, Deadnaming, Emotional abuse, and Misogyny
Minor: Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Vomit, and Outing
ace_b's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Dysphoria, Transphobia, Mental illness, and Abandonment
Moderate: Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, and Homophobia
Minor: Sexual harassment
yvonne_cl's review against another edition
hopeful
inspiring
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
3.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Abandonment, Domestic abuse, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Transphobia, and Toxic relationship
Moderate: Child abuse, Grief, and Gaslighting
aslanjude's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Absolutely adored this book. A great exploration of coming out as trans/nonbinary in the world. A little cliche or "too perfect" but I didnt mind it. Perhaps it deserves less than a 5 for that, but I loved every second of it regardless. While it's not the main focus, I thought the romance aspect of the book was really well done! Often times in novels, theyre so short and so (especially if romance is not center to the plot) the development of the relationship can be lacking. You know that the ending is leading towards these people getting together but when you finish reading it you think the only chemistry in the relationship was plot based. I Wish You All The Best did none of that. It makes its clear the feelings Ben and Nathan have for each other and how, when, and why those feelings developed. I have seen some critique the book saying that their romance was too central to the plot and I find that wildly untrue. The plot is about Ben's development. Nathan is not a deciding factor in Ben getting help or healing, but Nathan is still important and helps them in this journey. Highly recommend!
Content Warnings
Graphic: Abandonment, Panic attacks/disorders, and Transphobia
Moderate: Child abuse and Domestic abuse
Minor: Dysphoria
seawarrior's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
lighthearted
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
I feel like I don't have much to say about this book, besides how much I loved it. Ben and Nathan's friendship-turned-relationship is so sweet and charming, it made this book a joy to read. I also thought Ben and Hannah's rocky but slowly healing relationship was rewarding to follow. This story does have some rough moments, but I still felt it was empowering throughout. I'm glad to have read it and highly recommend that others do too.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Deadnaming, Panic attacks/disorders, Religious bigotry, and Transphobia
Moderate: Domestic abuse and Dysphoria