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annietestin's review against another edition
adventurous
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Content Warnings
Moderate: Grief
Minor: Homophobia and Transphobia
ninkadp's review against another edition
such a good young-adult book. i remember my sister reading this book ages ago. :'-)
tmycann's review against another edition
4.0
I picked this up because I was intrigued by the cross-cultural perspective of a second-generation South Asian young woman facing the summer before her senior year. I hoped the immersion in the Indian-American point of view would take me past the very young voice the author imbued in her protagonist, Dimple. It took a few chapters for me to really get into the story given Dimple’s profound lack of self-confidence, her level of self-absorption, and her undiagnosed eating disorder.
It’s evident from the beginning that even Dimple isn’t entirely sure of her perspective:
I didn’t have to struggle for spy status. Fortunately I have this gift for invisibility, which comes in handy when you’re trying to take sneaky peeks at other people’s lives, and which is odd, considering I’m one of only two Indians in the whole school.
Her best friend is deeply troubled from family drama, so the story ends up being about the perverse attempt at exchanging self-hood between the two girls. The patter of the writing style carries a heavy English-as-a-second-language Indian flavor with compound nouns, verbs, and adjectives used liberally in the narrative.
All of these elements combined to make my first impression of Tanuja Desai Hidier’s work lean toward indifference. However, as the narrative unfolds, and Dimple has to learn both about herself and reveal the things she’s kept hidden even from her closest friend, she grows into a surprisingly strong young woman. By the end of the book I was entranced by who she’d become and what she’d learned not only of herself, but also her heritage.
The main issue for me, when reading YA novels, is how callow the protagonists are. In stories where that unformed self is not challenged I’m left frustrated; in this story, Dimple has to come to terms with both her own and her friend’s self-destructive tendencies, as well as learn to understand and accept her family’s love. It ended up being a profound exploration of how to balance different cultural influences in a single individual, and left me satisfied that Dimple could grow into a more interesting adult having faced all the things she started out wishing she could ignore.
For anyone who’s interested in a story with a strong South Asian flavor or one that addresses a different aspect of being a third-culture kid, this one has worthwhile nuggets to recommend itself.
It’s evident from the beginning that even Dimple isn’t entirely sure of her perspective:
I didn’t have to struggle for spy status. Fortunately I have this gift for invisibility, which comes in handy when you’re trying to take sneaky peeks at other people’s lives, and which is odd, considering I’m one of only two Indians in the whole school.
Her best friend is deeply troubled from family drama, so the story ends up being about the perverse attempt at exchanging self-hood between the two girls. The patter of the writing style carries a heavy English-as-a-second-language Indian flavor with compound nouns, verbs, and adjectives used liberally in the narrative.
All of these elements combined to make my first impression of Tanuja Desai Hidier’s work lean toward indifference. However, as the narrative unfolds, and Dimple has to learn both about herself and reveal the things she’s kept hidden even from her closest friend, she grows into a surprisingly strong young woman. By the end of the book I was entranced by who she’d become and what she’d learned not only of herself, but also her heritage.
The main issue for me, when reading YA novels, is how callow the protagonists are. In stories where that unformed self is not challenged I’m left frustrated; in this story, Dimple has to come to terms with both her own and her friend’s self-destructive tendencies, as well as learn to understand and accept her family’s love. It ended up being a profound exploration of how to balance different cultural influences in a single individual, and left me satisfied that Dimple could grow into a more interesting adult having faced all the things she started out wishing she could ignore.
For anyone who’s interested in a story with a strong South Asian flavor or one that addresses a different aspect of being a third-culture kid, this one has worthwhile nuggets to recommend itself.
satyridae's review against another edition
5.0
I adored this book. It started a little rough for me, Hidier's exuberant restretching unforming rebubbling of the language was abrupt. But once I dove in, let the words into my ear, let them bounce and scintillate and dance, then I was wholly present. Straightforward, age-old plot made very fresh here. Everyone in this book does some growing in very believable, sometimes painful ways. I loved the glimpse into both the Indian culture of Dimple's parents, and the hybrid dynamic culture of Dimple's peers. My heart ached for some of the kids I met herein, they were all very real people doing the best they can.
rumireads's review against another edition
adventurous
funny
reflective
medium-paced
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
esphixiet's review against another edition
5.0
I love this book. I love how fleshed out a character Dimple is. I love that her motivations and understanding (or lack thereof) are laid out. How her understanding of the world changes, and with that change, she grows. How her growth is palpable.
I love the relationships and how they develop. I love her parents especially, and how Dimple grows enough to understand that her parents weren't always who they are today.
There are a lot of lessons in this book that people of all ages could use. I know I could. I'm glad I had Dimple to teach me.
I love the relationships and how they develop. I love her parents especially, and how Dimple grows enough to understand that her parents weren't always who they are today.
There are a lot of lessons in this book that people of all ages could use. I know I could. I'm glad I had Dimple to teach me.
affabletoaster's review against another edition
3.0
Whew, this is a LONG, different book. I listened to the audiobook, and I think if I were reading the paper copy I would have skipped/skimmed long parts of this. For the first half of the book, I was fairly patient with the self-examination and the stream-of-consciousness, but after many hours of the audiobook I just wanted them to get on with the plot, and for SOMEONE to say something directly to SOMEONE else without any more pussyfooting around or any more phrases beginning with "it seemed like...".
Spoilery bits:
The character of Gwyn is extremely frustrating. She is, of course, the trope of the poor little rich girl who has figured out how to get everyone to throng around her while she convinces them that they're lucky she pays attention to them. I was so delighted when Sabina accuses her of "appropriating" Indian customs, but that never gets any traction, and when Dimple finally let's Gwyn have it, towards the end of the book, accusing her of "taking everything," Gwyn manages to make Dimple feel guilty! Infuriating. As far as I can tell, the book's message is that, since Dimple "gets the guy," then we can all ignore Gwyn's horrible behaviour.
I think Gwyn drove me extra-nuts because I really identified with Dimple's "place" in their relationship, having had a long string of "best friends" in elementary-middle-high school who were conventionally attractive, got lots of attention (and EVERY guy I liked), and who used me (occasionally overtly) to make themselves feel more desirable and powerful, some of them while also mooching off the stability of my home life.
Karsh is also pretty maddening. He clearly sees himself as some sort of white knight, needing to "protect" Gwyn and "show her not all men are like her dad," etc. And both Gwyn and Dimple are completely infatuated and orbiting around him. At one point, when he arrives somewhere, everyone (parents, children, cousins, and all) at once exclaim "Karsh!" in rapturous tones. And he speaks in very unnatural superlatives, lots of "you're amazing," "she's special," blah. It's not believable to be constantly saying these things sincerely. And then there was some downright juvenile stuff, like him hinting that he likes her by...leaving his shoes at her house twice. What?
The saving grace for this book is Dimple's parents, who are just the right amount of complex, and whose idiosyncrasies and hypocrasies are really quite believable. I did find it a bit odd how quickly they went from tee-totaling to drinking their faces off, but that's a minor quibble.
And speaking of Quibbles, I was really stunned that Dimple et al skipped right over "trans" and referred to Zara with the phrase, "she's a HE!" I'm certainly no authority on these things, but I was surprised the possibility that Zara was a "she" in all aspects of her life was not part of the discussion.
I read another review which said that this book felt like it was written by a hipster. I think that nails it on the head. "Well-behaved girl from stable Indian immigrant family learns to drink, do drugs, go to clubs, and make out with boys. She meets Lesbians and a drag queen, too. But she does these things with Indian family members, and therefore finds her identity. Also, DJs are really cool. The end." And there are loads of initialisms and acronyms that we are only sort of supposed to understand, and there's this really weird commitment to some kind of identity alphabet that was clunky to introduce and didn't really lend any personality or elucidation as the plot wore on, except to be gimmicky.
This review is going to come off that I really didn't like the book, which isn't altogether true, but I was very frustrated with the last third of it, so I think that colours my reflections right now. All in all, there were some parts of that lengthy description that I really liked, and the window into Indian-American culture, identity, and adaptation was fascinating. I think I'd like to read more books exploring similar themes (including one where the culturally-appropriating friend really gets hers. I've got an itch to scratch), but I don't think I'll be reading Hidier's sequel to this one.
Spoilery bits:
I think Gwyn drove me extra-nuts because I really identified with Dimple's "place" in their relationship, having had a long string of "best friends" in elementary-middle-high school who were conventionally attractive, got lots of attention (and EVERY guy I liked), and who used me (occasionally overtly) to make themselves feel more desirable and powerful, some of them while also mooching off the stability of my home life.
Karsh is also pretty maddening. He clearly sees himself as some sort of white knight, needing to "protect" Gwyn and "show her not all men are like her dad," etc. And both Gwyn and Dimple are completely infatuated and orbiting around him. At one point, when he arrives somewhere, everyone (parents, children, cousins, and all) at once exclaim "Karsh!" in rapturous tones. And he speaks in very unnatural superlatives, lots of "you're amazing," "she's special," blah. It's not believable to be constantly saying these things sincerely. And then there was some downright juvenile stuff, like him hinting that he likes her by...leaving his shoes at her house twice. What?
The saving grace for this book is Dimple's parents, who are just the right amount of complex, and whose idiosyncrasies and hypocrasies are really quite believable. I did find it a bit odd how quickly they went from tee-totaling to drinking their faces off, but that's a minor quibble.
And speaking of Quibbles, I was really stunned that Dimple et al skipped right over "trans" and referred to Zara with the phrase, "she's a HE!" I'm certainly no authority on these things, but I was surprised the possibility that Zara was a "she" in all aspects of her life was not part of the discussion.
I read another review which said that this book felt like it was written by a hipster. I think that nails it on the head. "Well-behaved girl from stable Indian immigrant family learns to drink, do drugs, go to clubs, and make out with boys. She meets Lesbians and a drag queen, too. But she does these things with Indian family members, and therefore finds her identity. Also, DJs are really cool. The end." And there are loads of initialisms and acronyms that we are only sort of supposed to understand, and there's this really weird commitment to some kind of identity alphabet that was clunky to introduce and didn't really lend any personality or elucidation as the plot wore on, except to be gimmicky.
This review is going to come off that I really didn't like the book, which isn't altogether true, but I was very frustrated with the last third of it, so I think that colours my reflections right now. All in all, there were some parts of that lengthy description that I really liked, and the window into Indian-American culture, identity, and adaptation was fascinating. I think I'd like to read more books exploring similar themes (including one where the culturally-appropriating friend really gets hers. I've got an itch to scratch), but I don't think I'll be reading Hidier's sequel to this one.
hatingongodot's review against another edition
4.0
Everything with her parents, her cousin, and Zara made me cry. Hell, I'm crying right now. I'm not gonna stop crying
artfromafriend's review against another edition
3.0
After finishing this audiobook (which was 14 hours long), I realized that I'll miss the characters in this book. This book was certainly wasn't perfect but wow, Born Confused is undeniably special.
- This book explores a variety of themes - family, friendship, love, arranged marriages, cultural identity, alienation from her Indian heritage, following your dreams, and growing up - all which are explored very thoroughly and with nuance.
- Loved how the narrative grew with Dimple; how her perceptions and presumptions change as she learns more about her identity and that she can be proud of it.
- Features a complex friendship with her best friend, Gwyn, who is white and does try to appropriate Dimple's culture.
- The romance was sweet but a little lacking in dimension and depth.
- Lastly, it was long. Positive: everything was thoroughly developed and made the narrative multifaceted and complex. Negative: it does feel like it drags a little bit.
- This book explores a variety of themes - family, friendship, love, arranged marriages, cultural identity, alienation from her Indian heritage, following your dreams, and growing up - all which are explored very thoroughly and with nuance.
- Loved how the narrative grew with Dimple; how her perceptions and presumptions change as she learns more about her identity and that she can be proud of it.
- Features a complex friendship with her best friend, Gwyn, who is white and does try to appropriate Dimple's culture.
- The romance was sweet but a little lacking in dimension and depth.
- Lastly, it was long. Positive: everything was thoroughly developed and made the narrative multifaceted and complex. Negative: it does feel like it drags a little bit.
angieinthemorning's review against another edition
4.0
Very heart-warming.
Tanuja Desai Hidier is definitely part of the Junot Diaz club of 'Let Me Unapologetically Talk To You About My Culture Because I Exist And Why The Fuck Not?' There is no hand-holding involved and nothing is spoonfed to anybody. I love it. A definite must read.
Tanuja Desai Hidier is definitely part of the Junot Diaz club of 'Let Me Unapologetically Talk To You About My Culture Because I Exist And Why The Fuck Not?' There is no hand-holding involved and nothing is spoonfed to anybody. I love it. A definite must read.
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