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4.24 AVERAGE
4.24 AVERAGE
I am not kidding I would give this book 100/5 stars if I could (I don't know why I would be kidding about that).
This was one of the most well written books I have ever read. I ~do not like coming out stories but I would read this book over and over again because it's so much more than a coming out story. It's not just coming out, but the Catholic-guilt-ridden experience of coming to terms with your own sexuality and a friend who sees everything that you can be eons before you see it in yourself.
I also love an unreliable narrator and Nate could not be less reliable but you have this reliable source of information and story telling in his best friend, Cam, and it was just so well done that I can't believe this is a YA book because I would recommend this book to literally anyone that can read.
This was one of the most well written books I have ever read. I ~do not like coming out stories but I would read this book over and over again because it's so much more than a coming out story. It's not just coming out, but the Catholic-guilt-ridden experience of coming to terms with your own sexuality and a friend who sees everything that you can be eons before you see it in yourself.
I also love an unreliable narrator and Nate could not be less reliable but you have this reliable source of information and story telling in his best friend, Cam, and it was just so well done that I can't believe this is a YA book because I would recommend this book to literally anyone that can read.
dark
emotional
hopeful
sad
tense
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
dark
emotional
tense
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
dark
emotional
sad
fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Wow. If you’ve ever wondered what it is like to struggle with your sexuality, read this book. It’s a tough look at how religion and family can cause an LGBTQ+ individual to struggle to come to terms with their identify and in the process hurt those around them.
Sometimes I read books and love them, and then days or weeks or months later I'd think back and go, "This wasn't as good as I thought it was." Well, this book is the opposite of that because I seem to love it more and more with each passing week.
Deposing Nathan is good. Like, award-winning good. Like, why the hell are you reading this when you could be pre-ordering the book RIGHT NOW good.
It's a propulsive debut that covers a myriad of complex topics from religion and sexuality, to parental abuse, to a friendship gone terribly wrong, and nails all of them with stunning clarity and a rawness that makes your heart weep.
Its two main characters are very flawed and very real, and while Nate's struggles broke my heart, it was Cam that captured it. Really, I was a goner from the moment he said, "A thousand merry fucks to the MCAT." He's one of those people who talk like they're reading from a movie script--charming and sarcastic and wit dripping down the tail end of every sentence. You're not sure if they're arrogant or just too smart for their own good, but either way you're drawn to them because they're like walking motes of light and just being with them makes you feel alive.
So there's Cam on one side, who is able to reconcile Christianity with his sexuality, and then there's Nathan on the other, who just cannot. And there lies the heart of the story's conflict.
And what I loved and appreciated most is just how much they communicate together. If they have a problem, they say it outright, regardless of how harsh it is. Sometimes because of how harsh it is, because they want to hurt each other in the worst ways. And that might be a weird compliment to give to a book--that the argument scenes are done incredibly well. But I think verbal fight scenes in books are so hard to pull off, and Smedley pulls it off well enough to make me grimace and forget that this is fiction.
I realize these scenes might be triggering for a lot of people--this being with someone who's unable to acknowledge a part of their identity, but still refusing to give up on them because you love them and you believe love will pull through in the end. And on the flip side, being stretched out so thin between parental pressure and the feeling of not knowing who you are.
But I think the payoff is absolutely worth it, because the ending is immensely satisfying, painful yet healing. In between bouts of heavy crying, I was filled with so much pride for both characters.
As for criticisms...If I had reviewed this a month ago, immediately after finishing it, I would have said that Aunt Lori crosses over into evil Disney stepmother territory at times. And that some of her actions feel unrealistic next to the organic nature of Nathan and Cam's relationship. But I've sat on it for a month and I'm going to cancel that out. Because the world is wide and there's a wide variety of shitty people out there, many absolutely falling into the cartoonish category, and some even holding offices of high power. So who am I to state what is and isn't realistic when it comes to abusive adult figures?
A hard read but an absolute must-read.
~
Review copy provided by the publisher. All opinions are my own.
Deposing Nathan is good. Like, award-winning good. Like, why the hell are you reading this when you could be pre-ordering the book RIGHT NOW good.
It's a propulsive debut that covers a myriad of complex topics from religion and sexuality, to parental abuse, to a friendship gone terribly wrong, and nails all of them with stunning clarity and a rawness that makes your heart weep.
Its two main characters are very flawed and very real, and while Nate's struggles broke my heart, it was Cam that captured it. Really, I was a goner from the moment he said, "A thousand merry fucks to the MCAT." He's one of those people who talk like they're reading from a movie script--charming and sarcastic and wit dripping down the tail end of every sentence. You're not sure if they're arrogant or just too smart for their own good, but either way you're drawn to them because they're like walking motes of light and just being with them makes you feel alive.
So there's Cam on one side, who is able to reconcile Christianity with his sexuality, and then there's Nathan on the other, who just cannot. And there lies the heart of the story's conflict.
"If you're wondering why I'm not designing my sexual identity around a few sentences from a twelve hundred-page book that was last fact-checked two thousand years ago, I don't have an answer for you. Christianity is about love, and acceptance, and I'm as much a part of it as you are."I'm always going on and on about messy characters and how they're so important--especially teenage ones--and Nathan and Cam are two of the best examples I've come across in recent years. The book doesn't pull punches with these two. They say and do terrible things to each other with nothing spared. Every grievance, frustration, and anger are hashed out in scenes that twisted my stomach into knots.
And what I loved and appreciated most is just how much they communicate together. If they have a problem, they say it outright, regardless of how harsh it is. Sometimes because of how harsh it is, because they want to hurt each other in the worst ways. And that might be a weird compliment to give to a book--that the argument scenes are done incredibly well. But I think verbal fight scenes in books are so hard to pull off, and Smedley pulls it off well enough to make me grimace and forget that this is fiction.
I realize these scenes might be triggering for a lot of people--this being with someone who's unable to acknowledge a part of their identity, but still refusing to give up on them because you love them and you believe love will pull through in the end. And on the flip side, being stretched out so thin between parental pressure and the feeling of not knowing who you are.
But I think the payoff is absolutely worth it, because the ending is immensely satisfying, painful yet healing. In between bouts of heavy crying, I was filled with so much pride for both characters.
As for criticisms...If I had reviewed this a month ago, immediately after finishing it, I would have said that Aunt Lori crosses over into evil Disney stepmother territory at times. And that some of her actions feel unrealistic next to the organic nature of Nathan and Cam's relationship. But I've sat on it for a month and I'm going to cancel that out. Because the world is wide and there's a wide variety of shitty people out there, many absolutely falling into the cartoonish category, and some even holding offices of high power. So who am I to state what is and isn't realistic when it comes to abusive adult figures?
"I just don't think it's possible to love someone and be afraid of them at the same time."Deposing Nathan is a beautiful and stark love letter to teens (and adults) who have their faith in one hand and sexuality in the other and are wondering if they can walk their lives carrying both.
A hard read but an absolute must-read.
~
Review copy provided by the publisher. All opinions are my own.
First of all, this book is so well written. I was drawn in right from the first page, and I was fully engaged in the story throughout the whole book. I would have read it in one sitting if I could have.
And it's just such a good book as well. If you want to read about lovable characters who make good choices, you should probably skip this. But that's what makes it interesting.
The author description says Zack Smedley's goal is to write "gritty, morally complex narratives", and that's exactly what this is. Nathan is a main character with a lot of issues to deal with. His mum died a few years prior to the story and now he lives with his father and his abusive aunt. He has to learn how to reconcile his Catholic faith with his bisexuality. And he makes bad choices. He screws up a lot.
It would be very easy to hate him, and I think in a lot of books, I would have. And it's really the biggest strength of this novel that I didn't. Because it's so easy to judge, and so human to make mistakes, even ones you can't fix. There was so much character development in that sense, with Nate becoming more self aware and realizing he has to work on himself. I absolutely loved the ending, because, without wanting to give anything away, it fits exactly with what the characters need.
Nowhere in this story are things black and white. And what's interesting is that, where most books try to wrap up everything nicely at the end, this book doesn't try to do that at all. Instead, it fully embraces the idea that people are always a work in progress, and even more so if they have issues to deal with. The best message it sends is that you can't expect others to fix your problems for you. You have to work through them alone. Of course, you can get support if needed, but at the end of the day, you're the one who's responsible for doing the work. You can't put that on anyone else.
Rep: bisexual MC, bisexual love interest, side character with anxiety & explicit use of medication, black side character in a wheelchair
CWs: violence, stabbing, abuse, (internalized) biphobia, homophobia, homophobic slurs, cheating, parental death in the past, panic attack
And it's just such a good book as well. If you want to read about lovable characters who make good choices, you should probably skip this. But that's what makes it interesting.
The author description says Zack Smedley's goal is to write "gritty, morally complex narratives", and that's exactly what this is. Nathan is a main character with a lot of issues to deal with. His mum died a few years prior to the story and now he lives with his father and his abusive aunt. He has to learn how to reconcile his Catholic faith with his bisexuality. And he makes bad choices. He screws up a lot.
It would be very easy to hate him, and I think in a lot of books, I would have. And it's really the biggest strength of this novel that I didn't. Because it's so easy to judge, and so human to make mistakes, even ones you can't fix. There was so much character development in that sense, with Nate becoming more self aware and realizing he has to work on himself. I absolutely loved the ending, because, without wanting to give anything away, it fits exactly with what the characters need.
Nowhere in this story are things black and white. And what's interesting is that, where most books try to wrap up everything nicely at the end, this book doesn't try to do that at all. Instead, it fully embraces the idea that people are always a work in progress, and even more so if they have issues to deal with. The best message it sends is that you can't expect others to fix your problems for you. You have to work through them alone. Of course, you can get support if needed, but at the end of the day, you're the one who's responsible for doing the work. You can't put that on anyone else.
Rep: bisexual MC, bisexual love interest, side character with anxiety & explicit use of medication, black side character in a wheelchair
CWs: violence, stabbing, abuse, (internalized) biphobia, homophobia, homophobic slurs, cheating, parental death in the past, panic attack
This book was so so powerful. It makes your heart hurt, your head throb, and your arms shiver. It's incredibly tough to read, but it's so important. The story will definitely impact you and will stay with you forever.
It is hard to imagine that this is a debut novel because it is so well done. I will definitely be praising this one for a while!
It is hard to imagine that this is a debut novel because it is so well done. I will definitely be praising this one for a while!
I have things to say but they’re all spoilers so like read this and we can talk about it thanks