Reviews with content warning for Excrement - Crying in H Mart

I can only add to all the praise this memoir has gotten. It was honest, brutal, heartbreaking, mesmerizing, just all-around wonderful.

I loved the way food was a focal point throughout the narration, how its connection with one's cultural heritage was so strongly and beautifully illustrated. It really prompted me to reflect on the food I've grown up with and its significance for my own selfhood.
The linguist in me also really appreciated the lovely reflections on language and on a mother tongue.

The writing style was just *chef's kiss*. There were so many passages that I kept re-reading thinking to myself "How could she manage to capture this feeling with such poignant words and turn of phrases?", I was just floored.

My mother had struggled to understand me just as I struggled to understand her. Thrown as we were on opposite sides of a fault line - generational, cultural, linguistic - we wandered lost without a reference point, each of us unintelligible to the other's expectations, until these past few years when we had just begun to unlock the mystery, carve the psychic space to accommodate each other, appreciate the differences between us, linger in our refracted commonalities. Then, what would have been the most fruitful years of understanding were cut violently short, and I was left alone to decipher the secrets of inheritance without its key.

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caribbeangirlreading's review against another edition

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emotional sad medium-paced

3.75

UNPOPULAR OPINION - My first reaction when I finished CiHM was that it was OK. Not amazing, but not terrible either. I’m not a fan of “celebrity memoirs” and I wasn’t a fan of the book’s casual narrative voice. I also felt that after that super strong first chapter (copied verbatim from her 2018 article) the book dragged for about 50 pages. It wasn’t until she moved to Oregon to take care of her mother that the book’s narrative became focused again.

LOVED -Zauner’s vulnerability was raw and unfiltered. To paraphrase her own mother, she didn’t keep 10% to herself, and I truly appreciated that. We live in a society that is scared to speak of death and dying and we need to be more open about a stage of life that none of us will be able to avoid. Like many memoirs, this one is best “read” on audio. Her voice is not the most polished, but I loved hearing her pronounce the names of Korean foods properly and I think it added a layer of honesty to her story.

Overall I’m glad I read this memoir and got to discuss it with book club friends. We had a wonderful time at a local family-owned Korean restaurant, eating many of the foods that Zauner enjoyed with her mom, and discussing our own complicated mother-daughter relationships. It also made me think deeply about how much I still rely on my mom to keep me connected to my Dominican family and how I need to do better.

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stephanieridiculous's review against another edition

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challenging emotional inspiring reflective sad tense fast-paced

4.0

Whew, what an emotional book!

A lovely exploration of identity, family, culture, and grief. While this book is heavy I didn't find it emotionally taxing. It's uplifting in the midst of it's weight, and Zauner is an exceptional story teller.

Aside from the primary topic of the book, parental death by cancer (which can get fairly graphic, but in a respectful way), the content warnings are somewhat mild. One very brief reference to past rape, references to drug/alcohol abuse, DV, occasional swear words, and this is the weirdest: there is one part where she compares something she's cooking to the consistency of male bodily fluids. Two references within a page of each other, so over quickly - but I won't be able to not think about that if I ever eat that food! I did put emotional abuse as a graphic content warning, but I suspect that's very cultural. The way Zauner explains her mother treated her would definitely classify as emotional abuse where I live, but I understand that's very different around the globe.

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laurataylor's review against another edition

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emotional reflective sad slow-paced

3.5

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professional_grandma's review against another edition

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challenging emotional reflective sad slow-paced

4.25

This style of writing brought me into the story and made me ache at her pains. Michelle Zauner’s ability to transition seamlessly between memories and time periods was fascinating. Her descriptions of food, music, and bittersweet memories with her mother kept me hooked to the end. This memoir shed a light on a perspective that I have no experience with. Though I will never understand this experience, it made me empathize with the pain of it and grew my perspective on so many things.
The one thing I didn’t agree with in this book was the discussion of religion as something people were forced into. However, everyone has different opinions and by the end the author seemed more open minded about it.

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elizlizabeth's review against another edition

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hopeful lighthearted sad medium-paced

3.0

The overarching theme of connecting food with culture and belonging, next to the grief of loosing a parent was so interesting to explore. Sadly, the author went in many tangents that weren't as interesting or relevant and seemed to be included to make Zauner look edgy and non-chalant in a way that seemed performative instead of sincere.
As a memoir I guess everyone is allowed to write however they want but after repeatedly being told by Zauner herself about her background writing articles I expected more.

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writewithapendragon's review against another edition

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challenging emotional reflective sad slow-paced

5.0

I really liked listening to this book as I would have no idea how the Korean dishes and words are pronounced, otherwise.

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