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pilartyping's review
challenging
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
5.0
The Body Papers by Grace Talusan
The Body Papers is a memoir written by Filipina-American Fullbright Scholar, Grace Talusan. A book that explores how much trauma a body can take while trying to keep your heart & soul alive, this book shows how Talusan’s healing has not been a linear process, but one that has been constant, however wavering, even when facing death (or its likelihood.)
Born in Manila, Philippines, Talusan immigrated to Boston, Massachusetts with her mom, dad & older sister. She returns to Manila throughout her life for brief visits with her family, but chooses to live there for a few months as an adult while doing research for her Fullbright scholarship. While telling us about her time in Manila as a “balikbayan” (a word coined in the Marcos dictatorship in the ‘80s & means something like “the-immigrant-returning-to-their-homeland-has-become-like-a-foreigner”), what it feels like to finally look like everyone else, what it’s like crossing Manila streets, Talusan tells us about her beloved nieces, & how they remind her of her own childhood, which, while fraught with sexual abuse perpetrated by her paternal grandfather, was also a somewhat “normal” childhood with soccer games, library books, and the Catholic Church, like any other.
Knowing full well that this memoir covers severe child abuse, it took me a while to pick it up because I wasn’t ever sure if I was ready. Checked-out from the library, & still hungry for more stories from Filipina/o/x Americans after reading Castillo’s America Is Not The Heart, I finally picked this book up & started reading the first pages, which immediately pulled me in with its gentle yet vivid descriptions about living in Manila as a returning immigrant.
This book is not only about the abuse that Talusan survives as a child, but this book is also about Talusan’s body & the trauma she endures with it into adulthood when she discovers she is genetically predisposed to two kinds of cancer.
Though what may be a triggering read, Talusan’s writing feels so familiar that my engagement with the book felt almost effortless. Not to say I read this in one sitting. I needed time to process certain parts, even the happy parts, which this book surprisingly has a lot of because of the love that exists in the writer’s life.
Bookmarked quotes:
“This is what happens when assimilation brings erasure: I lost my first language, Tagalog.” p. 45
“And what did a woman mean after all? As a middle-aged woman, I still have moments when I feel eleven.” p. 63
“Reaching out to other people and connecting, which is the exact opposite of how I felt when I was being abused, is why and how I am alive. All this work in healing has made it possible for me to have a life.” - p. 147
“I become too distracted by all the fine dining and shopping to locate my grief, to remember what was lost.” - p. 238
gafiesta's review
5.0
Reading this book I felt a kinship to Grace Talusan - on being Filipino-American, on going back to the Philippines, on feelings of belonging and acceptance of culture, and on familial loyalty. I really enjoyed her voice as she told stories about growing up in America, moving back to the Philippines on a Fulbright Fellowship, and reconnecting with her home.
mpjustreading's review
5.0
The Body Papers is a collection of essays exploring Grace Talusan’s past memories, including her experience with immigration. Her journey of rediscovering her identity as a Filipinx, and reclaiming her body from abuse, trauma, and illness.
This is the first memoir I’ve read by a Filipinx author. It’s so relatable, especially when Grace Talusan talks about cultural factors regarding shame and denial within the Filipinx community that hinders someone from reporting abuse or talking about mental health illness. .
Family is an extremely important aspect of Filipinx culture. The family is the foundation of social life, so Filipinas/os typically aim to have collective and harmonious interpersonal relationships. So what do you do when someone in your family hurts you? Part of your identity as a Filipinx deconstructs. Without close-knit family ties, you start to question who you are and if it’s even possible to heal.
When Grace Talusan told her family about the abuse she experiences for years, I was enraged. Her family was not surprised, their reaction minimized the trauma, and they were more protective of the family’s closeted pedophile because he was the Tatang of the family. When Grace Talusan reveals what her grandfather has done to her, there’s dissonance. A “threat” that this confession may disrupt the collective, harmonious family. There’s a magnified shame that comes with revealing the trauma that has happened, and a learned need to protect other family members from this shame. This is how culture influences underreported abuse. How it creates an inaccurate picture of a community. And how unfortunately, victims are most of the time silenced.
This is the first memoir I’ve read by a Filipinx author. It’s so relatable, especially when Grace Talusan talks about cultural factors regarding shame and denial within the Filipinx community that hinders someone from reporting abuse or talking about mental health illness. .
Family is an extremely important aspect of Filipinx culture. The family is the foundation of social life, so Filipinas/os typically aim to have collective and harmonious interpersonal relationships. So what do you do when someone in your family hurts you? Part of your identity as a Filipinx deconstructs. Without close-knit family ties, you start to question who you are and if it’s even possible to heal.
When Grace Talusan told her family about the abuse she experiences for years, I was enraged. Her family was not surprised, their reaction minimized the trauma, and they were more protective of the family’s closeted pedophile because he was the Tatang of the family. When Grace Talusan reveals what her grandfather has done to her, there’s dissonance. A “threat” that this confession may disrupt the collective, harmonious family. There’s a magnified shame that comes with revealing the trauma that has happened, and a learned need to protect other family members from this shame. This is how culture influences underreported abuse. How it creates an inaccurate picture of a community. And how unfortunately, victims are most of the time silenced.
crystallyn's review
5.0
Beautifully and emotionally wrought, The Body Papers gives us a unique insight into the life of Talusan, a Filipino immigrant. It's a story of a woman living between countries, wrestling with the memories of harrowing sexual abuse at the hands of a family member, and the devastating track record of cancer in the family. These are heavy issues, but Talusan shares her story with unusual clarity of insight, in passages that fill the reader with something indescribable, leaving you unable to tear your eyes away from the page.
jnelly14's review
challenging
emotional
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
5.0
This book punched me in the gut. Grace Talusan puts in words the the Fil Am experience that I didn't know could be put into words. She packs so much and in such a small novel. I don't think I can properly review this one considering how personal it feels to me.
nordstina's review
4.0
This was really good. Talusan really packs a lot into a pretty short memoir. She talks about the cultural changes moving from the Philippines to the US, living in a very white neighborhood and the casual racism she encountered. Her writing about years and years of sexual abuse by her grandfather is heart wrenching. She also discusses the decision to have a mastectomy after testing positive for the BRCA1 gene. Highly recommend this.