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isabellazuniga's review against another edition
informative
reflective
medium-paced
3.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Addiction and Sexual content
kellenpenn's review against another edition
4.0
Informational. Gives some perspective to some things. I wish there were more citations or more practical implementations, but I still found it informative.
momopinay's review against another edition
hopeful
informative
inspiring
mysterious
medium-paced
4.0
infinimata's review against another edition
2.0
Glistening anecdata. I'm realizing more and more every day how baleful an influence Malcolm Gladwell has been on layman's nonfiction as a genre.
poovii's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.0
this book was so inviting, intimate, and informative. I felt like I was curled up on Lembkes lap as she read out loud to me.
yashrydz's review against another edition
4.25
Key points:
- What is dopamine (a neurotransmitter) how it works on our behaviours (understand the balance between pain-pleasure, and understand the control mechanisms that exists)
- Dopamine and medication (author poses a lot of good questions, pharmacotherapy related questions here)
- Embracing pain for dopamine regulation: ice baths, exercise and neurogenesis, fasting, extreme sports, embracing controlled pain can help regulate dopamine. This process, known as hormesis, involves exposing the body to small amounts of stress to boost dopamine response
- Sex and dopamine (enhances dopamine regulation)
- Caution against excessive pain (pain could be addictive too, when the balance scale tipped over to the other side) and can cause dopamine deficit states whereby could lead to feelings of apathy, lack of motivation.
The emphasis is on honesty as a core value in raising children. Honesty fosters an awareness of our mental balance and processes, helping children understand and navigate their emotions and thoughts.
In parenting, creating a prosocial shame cycle is essential. By admitting to their own wrongdoings, parents set a positive example and create a safe space for their children to be honest (page 225). On page 227, further discussion on parenting emphasizes this approach. Our tendency to run away stems from a desire to avoid the painful feelings associated with shame. By fostering an environment of prosocial shame, we can teach ourselves and our children to face challenges with accountability and compassion, ultimately leading to growth and resilience.
Encouraging prosocial shame—shame that guides behavior without being destructive—can help children develop a strong moral compass. The author shares her own story on page 191, illustrating the importance of a truth narrative. She advocates that being a truthful and honest person leads to a more authentic, open, spontaneous, and free self. This stands in stark contrast to the feelings of depersonalization that can arise from dishonesty and deceit.
---
On page 194, the text discusses the difference between a plenty mindset and a scarcity mindset, and how these relate to honesty and truthfulness. A scarcity mindset, driven by dopamine overload, impairs our ability to delay gratification, as noted on page 196. In contrast, a plenty mindset, which stems from more than just material wealth, involves beliefs, working towards goals, creating a meaningful life, and finding connection and purpose. These require radical honesty. Honesty enhances our awareness, as emphasized on page 204.
➡️In today’s world, we may have lost the ability to find answers, feel frustration, and learn to delay gratification due to our constant pursuit of immediate pleasure and dopamine hits. Embracing honesty and a plenty mindset can help us reconnect with these essential skills, allowing us to lead more authentic and fulfilling lives.
➡️We often choose to run away from our problems and emotions due to the powerful impact of shame. On pages 207 and 208, the differences between shame and guilt are explored. Guilt is feeling bad about what we have done, whereas shame is feeling bad about who we are. There are various types of shame, and on page 216, the focus is on encouraging prosocial shame. This type of shame promotes accountability and growth, rather than destruction. On page 219, it is suggested that we encourage accountability with compassion.
1. Embrace your life, don't avoid it.
2. Engage in stillness-inducing activities.
3. Practice moderation for renewal.
4. Implement self-binding to curb overconsumption, using physical, time, and category-based strategies.
- What is dopamine (a neurotransmitter) how it works on our behaviours (understand the balance between pain-pleasure, and understand the control mechanisms that exists)
- Dopamine and medication (author poses a lot of good questions, pharmacotherapy related questions here)
- Embracing pain for dopamine regulation: ice baths, exercise and neurogenesis, fasting, extreme sports, embracing controlled pain can help regulate dopamine. This process, known as hormesis, involves exposing the body to small amounts of stress to boost dopamine response
- Sex and dopamine (enhances dopamine regulation)
- Caution against excessive pain (pain could be addictive too, when the balance scale tipped over to the other side) and can cause dopamine deficit states whereby could lead to feelings of apathy, lack of motivation.
The emphasis is on honesty as a core value in raising children. Honesty fosters an awareness of our mental balance and processes, helping children understand and navigate their emotions and thoughts.
In parenting, creating a prosocial shame cycle is essential. By admitting to their own wrongdoings, parents set a positive example and create a safe space for their children to be honest (page 225). On page 227, further discussion on parenting emphasizes this approach. Our tendency to run away stems from a desire to avoid the painful feelings associated with shame. By fostering an environment of prosocial shame, we can teach ourselves and our children to face challenges with accountability and compassion, ultimately leading to growth and resilience.
Encouraging prosocial shame—shame that guides behavior without being destructive—can help children develop a strong moral compass. The author shares her own story on page 191, illustrating the importance of a truth narrative. She advocates that being a truthful and honest person leads to a more authentic, open, spontaneous, and free self. This stands in stark contrast to the feelings of depersonalization that can arise from dishonesty and deceit.
---
On page 194, the text discusses the difference between a plenty mindset and a scarcity mindset, and how these relate to honesty and truthfulness. A scarcity mindset, driven by dopamine overload, impairs our ability to delay gratification, as noted on page 196. In contrast, a plenty mindset, which stems from more than just material wealth, involves beliefs, working towards goals, creating a meaningful life, and finding connection and purpose. These require radical honesty. Honesty enhances our awareness, as emphasized on page 204.
➡️In today’s world, we may have lost the ability to find answers, feel frustration, and learn to delay gratification due to our constant pursuit of immediate pleasure and dopamine hits. Embracing honesty and a plenty mindset can help us reconnect with these essential skills, allowing us to lead more authentic and fulfilling lives.
➡️We often choose to run away from our problems and emotions due to the powerful impact of shame. On pages 207 and 208, the differences between shame and guilt are explored. Guilt is feeling bad about what we have done, whereas shame is feeling bad about who we are. There are various types of shame, and on page 216, the focus is on encouraging prosocial shame. This type of shame promotes accountability and growth, rather than destruction. On page 219, it is suggested that we encourage accountability with compassion.
1. Embrace your life, don't avoid it.
2. Engage in stillness-inducing activities.
3. Practice moderation for renewal.
4. Implement self-binding to curb overconsumption, using physical, time, and category-based strategies.