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its_tara's review against another edition
3.0
I’ve got a lot of thoughts and I don’t know where to start. I’ll think about this and write properly later.
spookyllamas's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
4.5
dreamboatannie's review against another edition
1.0
This book was, hands down, one of the most irritating reading experiences of my life. You know that baby or child on a plan who won't stop crying and flailing around, and you sort of feel sorry for them because hey, flying is weird and upsetting to a child? This book was like a transatlantic flight where you're sandwiched into a middle seat between an uncontrollably bratty child and their parent who doesn't discipline them and instead spends a good solid three hours telling you how smart their precious little one is.
Jani sounds like a handful and I don't know if her diagnosis is a proper one, but it's clear something is amiss. Despite her behavior being difficult to see past initially, she seems to have a genuinely sweet personality, and the idea that she feels scared, out of control, or like a "bad" child is truly heartbreaking.
Her dad, Michael, as presented in this book seems like a deeply unpleasant person who finds meaning in life by being a martyr. His relationship with his wife as described in this book seems at best awful and at worst emotionally and perhaps verbally abusive. He is obsessed with detailing how special he is; no other parent (even his wife!) can truly understand how hard his life is for him. He also is strangely convinced that only HE truly knows how to parent Jani, only HE can control their family pet, only HE fully accepts and appreciates Jani's intelligence.
Oh, Jani's intelligence. In case you missed it the first few times it's brought up in the book, don't worry, you'll have a couple hundred more opportunities to read all about how Jani is so intelligent and that because she is academically gifted, she has a right to be absolutely atrocious. Those who dislike her bad behavior simply don't understand her GENIUS. Doctors who suggested a firmer hand with her (the result of which was decreased -- though not entirely eradicated -- negative behavior) just didn't KNOW Jani like Michael did, and were too stupid to realize that giving her firm boundaries and rules only hampered her budding genius.
This book isn't about parenting a special needs child, this book is about a really unpleasant person who happens to have a child with special needs.
Jani sounds like a handful and I don't know if her diagnosis is a proper one, but it's clear something is amiss. Despite her behavior being difficult to see past initially, she seems to have a genuinely sweet personality, and the idea that she feels scared, out of control, or like a "bad" child is truly heartbreaking.
Her dad, Michael, as presented in this book seems like a deeply unpleasant person who finds meaning in life by being a martyr. His relationship with his wife as described in this book seems at best awful and at worst emotionally and perhaps verbally abusive. He is obsessed with detailing how special he is; no other parent (even his wife!) can truly understand how hard his life is for him. He also is strangely convinced that only HE truly knows how to parent Jani, only HE can control their family pet, only HE fully accepts and appreciates Jani's intelligence.
Oh, Jani's intelligence. In case you missed it the first few times it's brought up in the book, don't worry, you'll have a couple hundred more opportunities to read all about how Jani is so intelligent and that because she is academically gifted, she has a right to be absolutely atrocious. Those who dislike her bad behavior simply don't understand her GENIUS. Doctors who suggested a firmer hand with her (the result of which was decreased -- though not entirely eradicated -- negative behavior) just didn't KNOW Jani like Michael did, and were too stupid to realize that giving her firm boundaries and rules only hampered her budding genius.
This book isn't about parenting a special needs child, this book is about a really unpleasant person who happens to have a child with special needs.
onebookaweek's review against another edition
4.0
I read half the book in one sitting! I can't put it down. The story is so touching, I just want to know what happens to this strong family. At times, at read this as if it were a work of fiction and have to remind myself that this is a real story, which only makes this book more consuming.
thestygianphrase's review against another edition
Das Buch schürt die Aggressivität gegenüber die Eltern, insbesondere gegenüber den Vater, von Beginn an wie bisher kein anderes. Die Hauptfigur und die zu Bemitleidende ist keineswegs die "erkrankte" Tochter, vielmehr der Verfasser und seine narzisstische Neigung, sich mit jeglicher Kraft in den Mittelpunkt zu drängen, wofür er seine eigene Familie bedenkenlos als Werkzeug verwendet. Er besitzt weder die Fähigkeit, seine Gedanken und sein Verhalten zu reflektieren (sogar während der Verfassung des Buches) noch ein Minimum an Empathie, wenngleich deutlich zu erlesen ist, dass er beide Fähigkeiten seinen Mitmenschen abverlangt. Zudem versteht der Verfasser seine "Mittelmäßigkeit" als eine Form von Versagen und aus diesem Grunde für seine Tochter als nicht erstrebenswert. Zweifellos eine toxische Denkweise und dennoch gewissermaßen weitverbreitet. Gleichzeitig zwängt er seine Tochter in die Rolle einer Schwererkrankten, um sich anschließend selbst als den liebenden, aufopfernden und heldenhaften Vater zu bejubeln. Es ist bemitleidenswert, dass dieses Buch keiner Fiktion entspringt.
trollishka's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
sad
medium-paced
5.0
southernhon's review against another edition
3.0
The book itself is a fascinating look at a family dealing with a child who is obviously very disturbed. It was a quick read and an honest look at the sad state of care and treatment of the mentally ill in our country. The book begins when Jani is three years old and her father, Michael, must take her to the mall in order to wear her out so she'll sleep. We learn all about Jani's imaginary friends, her violent outbursts and her stubborn refusals to obey her parents. I am not an expert in mental illness and make no claims to fully comprehend the extent of Jani's problems. She certainly does have issues and I am not going to minimize those in the review of this book.
However... Jani's father comes off as the most arrogant, entitled jerk imaginable. He routinely makes condescending remarks to any professional who tries to help his daughter. He insists that she stay in school even though her violent behavior is a threat to other children. He argues with psychiatrists, insisting that her behavior is caused by her "genius" IQ of 146. I have a gifted child and he was at times hard to deal with. Many gifted children have vivid imaginations and reach milestones ahead of their peers, which makes social interaction with other children difficult. However, this father constantly (at least 20 times in the book) excuses her behavior due to this alleged superior intelligence.
Jani's mother seems intent on torturing her by forcing her to attend other children's birthday parties and playdates as if she were completely normal. She often disrupts the activities, thus further isolating herself from any meaningful peer relationships. I felt sorry for Jani because she obviously couldn't handle these outings.
There is also some really bad parenting going on. One scene especially stands out in my mind. Jani, age 5, was an inpatient at a psychiatric hospital. During visitation, her baby brother begins teething on one of her toys. Instead of hitting him (which she routinely tried to do), she practically pleads with her parents not to allow him to bite her toys. Seems like a reasonable request, right? Well, her parents, in their infinite stupidity, begin trying to reason with her, saying that he will not put bite marks in her toys and the father bites the toy himself to show her that there will be no bite marks. Why couldn't they just respect her wishes and praise her for using her words instead of reacting violently? They truly are clueless parents. The poor kid is freaking institutionalized and here they are forcing her to share her toys with her brother.
After a few years of trying to use reason with her, they start the tough love approach of isolating her in her room for bad behavior, which doesn't work. I just want to say that I completely understand the parents' frustration and the need to try anything at that point. It's really too bad that she was already confused and mentally ill.
So, why would any parent choose to bring another child into this chaotic environment? Well, because Jani wanted them to. After the baby brother was born, they spend most of their time trying to protect him from Jani's wrath.
Later on in the book, it's revealed that Michael shook Jani when she was a baby. OK, now any sympathy I might have had for him has disappeared. There was also a trumped up charge of sexual abuse levied against him, which seems a little suspicious as well.
Throughout the book, you can see the marriage between Michael and Susan (Jani's mother) falling apart as he distances himself from his wife and son in some heroic attempt to "rescue" his daughter from the outside world. He is rude to his wife often and barely spent any time at all with his newborn son. It seems that Michael did not have a grip on his own emotional problems and attempted suicide when Jani was about 6 years old.
Michael, a college professor, seems to be falling apart emotionally at one point and lashes out at an entire classroom of innocent college students. Pathetic, really.
Some have accused him of Munchausen By Proxy syndrome and it certainly appears to be a possibility. Childhood onset schizophrenia is associated with brain abnormalities and Jani had none of these. It seems more likely that a diagnosis of autism with psychosis would have been more realistic. Whatever the diagnosis, it is my hope that this intelligent, unique little girl is able to function in society even with her idiotic parents in charge.
However... Jani's father comes off as the most arrogant, entitled jerk imaginable. He routinely makes condescending remarks to any professional who tries to help his daughter. He insists that she stay in school even though her violent behavior is a threat to other children. He argues with psychiatrists, insisting that her behavior is caused by her "genius" IQ of 146. I have a gifted child and he was at times hard to deal with. Many gifted children have vivid imaginations and reach milestones ahead of their peers, which makes social interaction with other children difficult. However, this father constantly (at least 20 times in the book) excuses her behavior due to this alleged superior intelligence.
Jani's mother seems intent on torturing her by forcing her to attend other children's birthday parties and playdates as if she were completely normal. She often disrupts the activities, thus further isolating herself from any meaningful peer relationships. I felt sorry for Jani because she obviously couldn't handle these outings.
There is also some really bad parenting going on. One scene especially stands out in my mind. Jani, age 5, was an inpatient at a psychiatric hospital. During visitation, her baby brother begins teething on one of her toys. Instead of hitting him (which she routinely tried to do), she practically pleads with her parents not to allow him to bite her toys. Seems like a reasonable request, right? Well, her parents, in their infinite stupidity, begin trying to reason with her, saying that he will not put bite marks in her toys and the father bites the toy himself to show her that there will be no bite marks. Why couldn't they just respect her wishes and praise her for using her words instead of reacting violently? They truly are clueless parents. The poor kid is freaking institutionalized and here they are forcing her to share her toys with her brother.
After a few years of trying to use reason with her, they start the tough love approach of isolating her in her room for bad behavior, which doesn't work. I just want to say that I completely understand the parents' frustration and the need to try anything at that point. It's really too bad that she was already confused and mentally ill.
So, why would any parent choose to bring another child into this chaotic environment? Well, because Jani wanted them to. After the baby brother was born, they spend most of their time trying to protect him from Jani's wrath.
Later on in the book, it's revealed that Michael shook Jani when she was a baby. OK, now any sympathy I might have had for him has disappeared. There was also a trumped up charge of sexual abuse levied against him, which seems a little suspicious as well.
Throughout the book, you can see the marriage between Michael and Susan (Jani's mother) falling apart as he distances himself from his wife and son in some heroic attempt to "rescue" his daughter from the outside world. He is rude to his wife often and barely spent any time at all with his newborn son. It seems that Michael did not have a grip on his own emotional problems and attempted suicide when Jani was about 6 years old.
Michael, a college professor, seems to be falling apart emotionally at one point and lashes out at an entire classroom of innocent college students. Pathetic, really.
Some have accused him of Munchausen By Proxy syndrome and it certainly appears to be a possibility. Childhood onset schizophrenia is associated with brain abnormalities and Jani had none of these. It seems more likely that a diagnosis of autism with psychosis would have been more realistic. Whatever the diagnosis, it is my hope that this intelligent, unique little girl is able to function in society even with her idiotic parents in charge.
steffiam's review against another edition
4.0
Shocking and scary, yet unputdownable. Read it basically in one sitting.
Baffled by all the bad reviews this book has gotten, mainly due to the father who seems selfish. I don’t think anyone can put themselves in his position in the first place and let’s not forget that everybody copes differently! Just as the title says: her father’s struggles. In my opinion he’s been honest all along rather than selfish or blaming towards others. It’s been a fight he was never able to win yet he tried his hardest and was even willing to give up his life for her.
Totally gripping, especially being a psychologist myself, it shows how little we know about schizophrenia itself, particularly in children.
Baffled by all the bad reviews this book has gotten, mainly due to the father who seems selfish. I don’t think anyone can put themselves in his position in the first place and let’s not forget that everybody copes differently! Just as the title says: her father’s struggles. In my opinion he’s been honest all along rather than selfish or blaming towards others. It’s been a fight he was never able to win yet he tried his hardest and was even willing to give up his life for her.
Totally gripping, especially being a psychologist myself, it shows how little we know about schizophrenia itself, particularly in children.
aftanith's review against another edition
3.0
January First was tragic.
There's no other word for a child suffering undiagnosed schizophrenia than "tragic", and reading about a young couple struggling to not only manage their daughter's psychosis but also to get a diagnosis at all is equal parts stressful and heartbreaking.
January First was terrifying.
January First offers a paralyzing glimpse into the United States mental health industry and how it can (and does) go horribly, horribly wrong. If you, like me, have the tendency to involuntarily empathize with victims of tragedy--fictional or otherwise--the chapters dealing with Jani's periods of hospitalization are extremely difficult to read. Jani is treated like... there's no word for what Jani is treated like. She and many of her fellow sufferers are downright abused under the guise of medical care, and any attempts by her parents to intervene make it increasingly obvious that Jani isn't a patient so much as she's a prisoner. The passages about Jani's stays at these so-called mental health facilities, with only one exception, read like horror novel fare... or the introduction to a ghost story about the lost spirits of nineteenth-century asylums.
I can't possibly communicate how deeply these passages horrified me.
January First was frustrating.
Regardless of how terrible his situation is, Michael Schofield is a person with whom I never, under any circumstances, would want to interact. His obvious anger management issues and martyr complex make the passages about his relationship with his wife quite uncomfortable to read. His insistence that his daughter is not just a special needs child but a "genius" is insulting to the reader and equal parts understanding Jani's potential and self-deluding himself into thinking that she's not sick--she's just better than everyone else's children. But most of all, Michael Schofield always thinks he's right. From the way he tells it, Mr. Schofield is the only person on this earth who understands and can help Jani.
January First was harsher in hindsight.
Not knowing how to deal with one of the youngest, if not the youngest, diagnosed case of childhood-onset schizophrenia, the Schofields made a very large mistake: they hoped to pull Jani out of her undiagnosed psychosis by attempting to forge a bond between Jani and a hypothetical younger sibling. That younger sibling came into the world as Bodhi, a brother who immediately becomes the subject of Jani's wrath and exasperates her condition. But as the Schofields start to get a handle on how to manage their schizophrenic daughter through medication, therapy, and creative living arrangements, life starts to turn around. When the memoir ends, the Schofields still struggle to manage their very unfortunate circumstances but seem to have achieved quite a bit.
Unfortunately, if you've seen the Discovery Health special, Born Schizophrenic: Jani's Next Chapter, which was filmed quite a bit after this book was written but before it was published, you'll know that Bodhi is now also showing signs of psychosis and may also face a schizophrenia diagnosis. Wince-worthy doesn't cover that.
I definitely recommend January First to anyone with an interest in childhood schizophrenia. However, I recommend that anyone interested in reading this book sit down to watch the Born Schizophrenic documentary first; having seen both Schofield documentaries before even realizing this book existed, I'm sure my opinion of the book would have been vastly different had I not had prior experience with the Schofield family and their experience.
justmai's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
informative
sad
tense
fast-paced
4.75