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189 reviews for:
Becoming Sister Wives: The Story of an Unconventional Marriage
Meri Brown, Kody Brown, Janelle Brown
2.98 AVERAGE
189 reviews for:
Becoming Sister Wives: The Story of an Unconventional Marriage
Meri Brown, Kody Brown, Janelle Brown
2.98 AVERAGE
OK. An easy read, but would be confusing if you never saw the show. Does give you a better idea of who the Browns are as individuals and why they chose to do a TV show.
I love the show. The book was dull. Nothing really new or insightful.
Becoming Sister Wives is a depressing read, no doubt about it.
My expectation of the book was that it would be anecdotal about the upbringings of each of the adults and the daily life of the family, possibly even delving into their religion.
However, the focus is on the emotional hardships and difficulties the wives have experienced among themselves and Kody. It almost seems like in each of the sections, a wife was talking about depression or jealousy, or hitting rock bottom with Kody.
I respect they are each being completely honest with their feelings. I wonder if any of them read the other's portion before publishing?
Most of the book felt sloppily put together. There was too much tip-toeing around the facts of a particular situation to make Becoming Sister Wives interesting. I can only take so much of the continuing conflict of each wife being completely sure that the other wife needed to belong in the family, but essentially hate her guts every day.
I really didn't get the message that having sister wives is the best thing ever, as they are always promoting on the show. What I got out of this book is that having sister wives is extremely difficult - which completely proves the reality of the whole situation instead of sugarcoating it for tv - and that none of the wives are actually comfortable with the other three at this point in time.
I was surprised that there are barely any religious references for a family that is fundamentalist mormon. There wasn't much of an attempt to educate on the topic. There are only brief glimpses into the religious life.
If you like the show, then reading the book won't hurt. It's very easy to read. There's not much to get out of it in terms of facts. Just a lot of whining and depressing talk.
My expectation of the book was that it would be anecdotal about the upbringings of each of the adults and the daily life of the family, possibly even delving into their religion.
However, the focus is on the emotional hardships and difficulties the wives have experienced among themselves and Kody. It almost seems like in each of the sections, a wife was talking about depression or jealousy, or hitting rock bottom with Kody.
I respect they are each being completely honest with their feelings. I wonder if any of them read the other's portion before publishing?
Most of the book felt sloppily put together. There was too much tip-toeing around the facts of a particular situation to make Becoming Sister Wives interesting. I can only take so much of the continuing conflict of each wife being completely sure that the other wife needed to belong in the family, but essentially hate her guts every day.
I really didn't get the message that having sister wives is the best thing ever, as they are always promoting on the show. What I got out of this book is that having sister wives is extremely difficult - which completely proves the reality of the whole situation instead of sugarcoating it for tv - and that none of the wives are actually comfortable with the other three at this point in time.
I was surprised that there are barely any religious references for a family that is fundamentalist mormon. There wasn't much of an attempt to educate on the topic. There are only brief glimpses into the religious life.
If you like the show, then reading the book won't hurt. It's very easy to read. There's not much to get out of it in terms of facts. Just a lot of whining and depressing talk.
A big ol', lovable train wreck. Bless their hearts.
I have always been interested in learning about people who live very differently from what I am used to. This book gave me more insight into why this family lives the way it does. The book got a little boring towards the end, but I enjoyed reading the book from the perspectives of each one of the adults in the Brown family.
Ugh. Just ugh.
I watch the TLC show 'Sister Wives' on occasion (when there isn't a conflict with it being on at the same time as True Blood and/or Homeland), so I already had a basis of what this book would be about before I picked it up from the library.
While it's a very quick read, I found that I could only stomach little chunks of it at a time. I felt like it was insulting my intelligence. I don't know if it's because the ghost writer that they had wrote at what felt like a 5th grade level or if the editor fell asleep on the job or what, but this book, much like the show itself, glossed over way too much.
The one takeaway I did have was an improved opinion of Janelle. Prior to reading this book she was sort of the wallflower wife in my eyes. Now, I wish they would spotlight her more. She's absolutely fascinating.
I watch the TLC show 'Sister Wives' on occasion (when there isn't a conflict with it being on at the same time as True Blood and/or Homeland), so I already had a basis of what this book would be about before I picked it up from the library.
While it's a very quick read, I found that I could only stomach little chunks of it at a time. I felt like it was insulting my intelligence. I don't know if it's because the ghost writer that they had wrote at what felt like a 5th grade level or if the editor fell asleep on the job or what, but this book, much like the show itself, glossed over way too much.
The one takeaway I did have was an improved opinion of Janelle. Prior to reading this book she was sort of the wallflower wife in my eyes. Now, I wish they would spotlight her more. She's absolutely fascinating.
An easy read and excellent companion piece (if you could call a book about reality stars that) to the TLC show, I was charmed and fully engaged by the book. I'm fascinated by Celestial Polygamy, so it was good to hear how each of the wives and Kody approached their relationships. I have a better understanding of what it's like--it's not easy and light-hearted like the show sometimes portrays it. This is a good book to read if you enjoy the show. If not? Don't bother.
This was so hilariously uncomfortable to read. It was meant to be a reveal of what polygamy is really like, and how great the wives get along, and how well they all function together, but what how it really came across was each wife finally getting a chance to HAVE HER SAY!!! without three other women yelling over her. One would tell a story and then another would come right behind her, telling the same story with thinly veiled passive aggressive jabs at the first. The best was Janelle and her stabs at Meri. Seriously, you have to read this. You have to.
There wasn't a lot in here that hadn't been shown in the show, but since I enjoyed the show I enjoyed this book as well.
I'm no stranger to low-brow television, but I haven't watched this particular show. I have, however, watched the entire series of Big Love and thought at the time, this is obviously fictional -- I guess the real fundamentalist polygamists of Utah look a lot more like Amish women -- meek and mild and wholly uninteresting to a television camera, if they should be of the sorts of people to even allow such a thing in their homes.
This book introduces us to a different kind of family altogether, a family whose mission is to let the rest of us know how 'normal' they are. Of course, when they say 'normal', they mean 'Utah normal', in the sense that 50 per cent of Utah is LDS. Their normal is a patriarchal model, in which daughters are chastised for wearing modern fashions, and in which (it's not lost on this reader), the shared patriarch gets the first and last word. (See 'Prologue' and 'Epilogue'.) Sadly, this kind of setup is actually pretty normal by world standards, and for this reason, polygamist families shouldn't be judged too harshly, and certainly shouldn't be separated from each other without there also being criminal behaviour.
But am I reassured, after reading this book, that a polygamist lifestyle is a perfectly good lifestyle choice? Hell, nope. If these women have found peace, it's because they've managed to separate themselves, both physically and financially, over the years. If they've found happiness together it's because we live in a society in which it's difficult to bring up children, especially while holding down a job.
Not once is it mentioned in the book what a world would look like in which everyone was polygamist. Because such a world is impossible, isn't it. In societies where the alpha males each have four or five wives, that leaves three or four men without wives. That leads to trouble, in the same way socities with heavy levels of female infanticide end up with these horribly unbalanced adult populations, with hoardes of semi-disenfranchised men roaming around unfulfilled. This sort of lifestyle isn't for everyone, says Kody, alpha male, because of course it can't be.
Not unless there are an equal number of polyandrous relationships in the same community. And I'm not aware of that ever happening. Nor would it, because that's not the world we live in.
In order to really get a handle on the inner workings of a polygamous household you'd need an insightful writer such as, say, Helen Garner, joining a family such as this for a year or three, then walking away for long reflection before writing something honest. This book doesn't even mention an editor, though they would have had one. Instead, what we have is a piece of promotional propaganda, in which the wives want to 'set the record straight' after appearing on a reality TV show that has been edited for sensationalism.
Here's what I took away from the book:
The more children a woman has in a polygamous relationship the more influence and prestige she carries within the family.
Polygamist families aren't necessarily more or less conservative than typical LDS/Christian/Catholic/Muslim etc families.
Children brought up around lots of siblings tend to want to recreate that environment for themselves as they continue throughout life. It's easy to feel lonely otherwise.
Polygamous relationships are one workaround a society which makes it difficult for women to have families as well as a career.
It doesn't matter if you're the second or third wife, a new wife entering the family after you will always lead to new jealousies. These feelings are considered a personal failing.
Polygamous relationships paradoxically would suit women who love being surrounded by people but who can cope well with not having a partner for four out of five nights.
Polygamous relationships get easier over the years as each adult gains maturity.
The more autonomy each woman has in a polygamous relationship, the happier she seems to get. This leads to the question: Wouldn't she be happiest of all with the full autonomy borne of having a single male partner? Or perhaps there is no such thing as full autonomy once you have children to take care of.
This book introduces us to a different kind of family altogether, a family whose mission is to let the rest of us know how 'normal' they are. Of course, when they say 'normal', they mean 'Utah normal', in the sense that 50 per cent of Utah is LDS. Their normal is a patriarchal model, in which daughters are chastised for wearing modern fashions, and in which (it's not lost on this reader), the shared patriarch gets the first and last word. (See 'Prologue' and 'Epilogue'.) Sadly, this kind of setup is actually pretty normal by world standards, and for this reason, polygamist families shouldn't be judged too harshly, and certainly shouldn't be separated from each other without there also being criminal behaviour.
But am I reassured, after reading this book, that a polygamist lifestyle is a perfectly good lifestyle choice? Hell, nope. If these women have found peace, it's because they've managed to separate themselves, both physically and financially, over the years. If they've found happiness together it's because we live in a society in which it's difficult to bring up children, especially while holding down a job.
Not once is it mentioned in the book what a world would look like in which everyone was polygamist. Because such a world is impossible, isn't it. In societies where the alpha males each have four or five wives, that leaves three or four men without wives. That leads to trouble, in the same way socities with heavy levels of female infanticide end up with these horribly unbalanced adult populations, with hoardes of semi-disenfranchised men roaming around unfulfilled. This sort of lifestyle isn't for everyone, says Kody, alpha male, because of course it can't be.
Not unless there are an equal number of polyandrous relationships in the same community. And I'm not aware of that ever happening. Nor would it, because that's not the world we live in.
In order to really get a handle on the inner workings of a polygamous household you'd need an insightful writer such as, say, Helen Garner, joining a family such as this for a year or three, then walking away for long reflection before writing something honest. This book doesn't even mention an editor, though they would have had one. Instead, what we have is a piece of promotional propaganda, in which the wives want to 'set the record straight' after appearing on a reality TV show that has been edited for sensationalism.
Here's what I took away from the book:
The more children a woman has in a polygamous relationship the more influence and prestige she carries within the family.
Polygamist families aren't necessarily more or less conservative than typical LDS/Christian/Catholic/Muslim etc families.
Children brought up around lots of siblings tend to want to recreate that environment for themselves as they continue throughout life. It's easy to feel lonely otherwise.
Polygamous relationships are one workaround a society which makes it difficult for women to have families as well as a career.
It doesn't matter if you're the second or third wife, a new wife entering the family after you will always lead to new jealousies. These feelings are considered a personal failing.
Polygamous relationships paradoxically would suit women who love being surrounded by people but who can cope well with not having a partner for four out of five nights.
Polygamous relationships get easier over the years as each adult gains maturity.
The more autonomy each woman has in a polygamous relationship, the happier she seems to get. This leads to the question: Wouldn't she be happiest of all with the full autonomy borne of having a single male partner? Or perhaps there is no such thing as full autonomy once you have children to take care of.