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shedevls's review
challenging
emotional
reflective
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.5
it's hard to put my thoughts about this book into words, given how personal the experience was, so i'll just say this: to say it was a difficult read is putting it mildly. it was something i had to put down many times over in order to step back and deal with my own feelings, but overall, it definitely helped me on my journey of both grieving and healing.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Suicide, Grief, and Child death
mwritesdragons's review
emotional
hopeful
mysterious
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
5.0
Content Warnings
Moderate: Child death, Suicide, and Grief
mochiwaffles's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? N/A
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
3.75
Content Warnings
Graphic: Grief, Suicide, and Child death
mellowbread's review against another edition
emotional
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.75
mY God I am in tears. "Words fall short, yes, but sometimes their shadows can reach the unspeakable." My words fall short now in describing what this was. I knew I would love this book after page 1 and seeing this raw Tumblr-esque line of "Endear, I thought, what an odd word. Endear. Endure. En-dear. In-dear. Can you out-dear someone?".
How do you compare sadness that takes over like an erupted volcano to sadness that stays inside one, still as a stillborn baby? People talk about grief coming and going like waves, but I am not a breakwater, I am not a boat, I am not a statue left on a rocky shore, tested for its endurance.
And who, my dear child, has taken the word lovable out of your dictionary and mine, and replaced it with perfect?
I wish you had made me an enemy, I said, rather than yourself.
Mothers, I thought, would be perfect for that role.
You can't be that for me, Mommy, Nikolai said. I've found a perfect enemy in myself.
I wasn't always in the right headspace for this kind of prose which is why it took longer than usual to finish. But damn did every chapter feel like a gut punch and a heartache. There were some lines I laughed at, like the conversation about diversifying your delusions. Then I teared up at lines like making it to shore safely, is it fear or hope that keeps us going, and the discussion of endings in general. Nikolai and his mother's discourse is sometimes repetitive and hard to follow but every time I picked up the book again I had more insights about the same sentence. God. I hope everyone who reads this makes it to shore safely. I hope you and I both learn how to live. Propagate those delusions. It's ok not to be perfect. Whatever it takes for reasons to start.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Suicide, Grief, and Child death
kyullua's review
reflective
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
3.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Grief
Moderate: Suicide and Suicide attempt
aweekinthelife's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
this is an all vibes, no plot novel of conversations between a mother and her late son. the writing is a beautiful reflection on what words mean and how they're used, a recurring fight between whether nouns or adjectives and adverbs were better.
i'm generally not a fan of books like this - i am all about a good plot that sucks you in. but two bookstagrammers i like a lot (@ktlee.writes and @hilaryreadsbooks) raved about this book so i checked it out on a whim. in my current stage of grieving my own losses, listening to these conversations were surprisingly helpful for me personally.
i'm generally not a fan of books like this - i am all about a good plot that sucks you in. but two bookstagrammers i like a lot (@ktlee.writes and @hilaryreadsbooks) raved about this book so i checked it out on a whim. in my current stage of grieving my own losses, listening to these conversations were surprisingly helpful for me personally.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Suicide and Grief
btwnprintedpgs's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death and Grief
Minor: Suicide
pun1sher's review
emotional
sad
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? N/A
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? N/A
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
It's not an easy book to get through but it's a must read. Very sad and soothing at the same time, made me cry. It's a strange experience to read this kind of a book if you've struggled with suicidal thoughts and know that you could've been that child in this book.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Grief and Child death
Moderate: Suicide and Mental illness
ahyacinthine's review against another edition
reflective
sad
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? N/A
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.75
The way that grief and motherhood are depicted in this novel is unreal and unconventional. This book was able to tug at my heartstrings in spite of its lack of lengthy descriptions of grief or terror or death. My emotions, whether they were nostalgic or sad or introspective, were brought out upon me through the dialogue this mother creates with her son /and herself/ most of all. It made me rethink the framework that we typically use to tell stories of loss and anguish; it’s uniqueness made me find some satisfied appreciation amidst a story so melancholy.
Content Warnings
Minor: Grief, Suicidal thoughts, and Suicide
tinique's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Suicide and Grief
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