The audiobook contains a bonus: a conversation with Jon Cabot-Zinn; though it's striking to me that Goleman does most of the talking.

I read "Social Intelligence" (which I think was meant to be a sequel to this one) many years ago, and then it inspired me so much that I decided to go to grad school in cognitive neuroscience (which didn't last for a variety of reasons--it was my last stop on the way to deciding on naturopathic medical school). But I'd never picked this one up before. As I was studying AI and how synthetic emotion differed from human emotion, I finally gave it a listen.

I think, had I listened to this all those years ago too, I'd have loved it. Now, though, I've read so many books on the research into emotion that I really can't think of a single stand-out takeaway from this book that I hadn't already read somewhere else. I certainly was impressed again with the idea that one's success in life (certainly socially and relationally, but also in career and maybe even in happiness) has a great deal to do with how well we can not only read others' emotions, but also respond to them appropriately. I winced at some of the chapters depicting socially awkward children, and the impact this awkwardness can have upon their present happiness and future prospects. (A few people I knew growing up immediately came to mind.) Some of the studies designed to coach socially awkward children are very promising, and I hope they will become widespread.

This is an essential book to read for anyone. I love how scientific it is and well-written. I wish this were revised with the recent research data and developments, but it was a very beneficial read nevertheless.

Dated data but still relevant.

The good news is that adults with low EQ can change. Even though old patterns of thinking have carved deep grooves in our brains, making it harder and harder over time to recover emotionally and develop healthy responses to our own and others' feelings, it can be done. That's the good news.

The bad news is that it is not easy.

Published in 1995, Goleman's book is apparently the one that started it all. The expression "EQ" is now part of the culture, and most of us do have a vague understanding of what it means and it's proven importance. Less well-known, of course, is exactly what constitutes emotional intelligence, what builds or destroys it, and what can be done to repair damage. That is why I am glad I read this one. The four-page summary I prepared is available as a free download. Find it at my blog at www.WhatisCathyReading.com.

I recently had an opportunity to attend a workshop on emotional intelligence at a nationwide conference of peers. With only three hours, the trainer had to pack a great deal into his presentation and small group exercises. Along the way he suggested that we not read this book, saying it was too dense and academic to hold our interest. I noticed that his materials were derived from other works in this field, notably the stuff produced by Travis Bradberry, Jean Greaves and the folks at TalentSmart. That's fine, but I disagree that Emotional Intelligence was difficult reading. It gives fullness to the work of those who came after and helped me understand some of what I learned in the Emotional Intelligence 2.0 self-assessment.

Here's a key quote for me, suggesting a strategy for improvement that I will be working to implement in my own life over the next few weeks:

"The train of angry thoughts that stokes anger is also potentially the key to one of the most powerful ways to defuse anger: undermining the convictions that are fueling the anger in the first place. The longer we ruminate about what has made us angry, the more 'good reasons' and self-justifications for being angry we can invent. Brooding fuels anger's flames. But seeing things differently douses those flames."

This idea has shown up in much of my reading. It's in Learned Optimism and other works by Martin Seligman. It's in Leadership and Self-Deception. It's in everything by Wayne Dyer and others who teach about the Law of Attraction. And it is certainly in Stephen Covey's work. My year-long exploration of The 8th Habit is what led me to finally read Goleman. But as Covey says "To know and not to do is really not to know." To get the full value from having read this book I will need to apply the lessons learned. Breathe. Count to ten. Challenge those negative thoughts. Let it go. Carve new neural pathways.

informative reflective medium-paced

This may well be one of the most important books to emerge from the new psychological thinking, which doesn't seem to think of us as illnesses to be cured so much as potentials to be realized. The states of being to which these new theories point us are those of joy, satisfaction, happiness, and maturity. Goleman makes a convincing case that we have been given models of emotional behavior which are at best neglectful of what is needed, and at worst destructive. There is also a prescriptive aspect to the book, which allows us to educate a new generation to be more emotionally intelligent, as well as retrain ourselves. A psychologist as well as a journalist, Goleman is not in the business of developing pie-in-the-sky, unproven methods, but of reporting the most recent research and deriving from it the ways in which we might proceed. As such, it is a trustworthy guide to our emotional futures. Merely seeing the patterns in our own behavior is enlightening and can lead to the beginnings of change. Highly recommended.

well written, extremely helpful. everyone should read it at least once. it's not light reading, but it's not heavy like a textbook either. any human can pick this up and learn something. i really really wish, as I think this book suggests (apologies if i'm mistaken), this subject was taught early to kids, as in grade school.

An influential book at the time it was launched. Responsible for a renewing interest in the studies of emotion, and a call of attention to this relevant humane part of our consciousness. However it rapidly fade to give place to other much more relevant books on the subject.
informative slow-paced

I'm sure it was revolutionary in its day.