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Reviews tagging 'Domestic abuse'
I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki by Baek Se-hee
71 reviews
kartoffel_00's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
From an objectively lense this isn't really a masterpiece or anything. But what this book definitely is, is that it's honest and comforting.
Its vivid and repetitive just like the state of a mind dealing with depression and anxiety.
Just like the author mentions in one of the essays how they hate being told to cheer up and would rather someone listen to them and empathise, reading this book I felt that someone could empathise with my struggles too.
My only regret with the book is that I could have read it slower to take things in more properly but as I connected with the subject matter a lot that proved a struggle.
Its vivid and repetitive just like the state of a mind dealing with depression and anxiety.
Just like the author mentions in one of the essays how they hate being told to cheer up and would rather someone listen to them and empathise, reading this book I felt that someone could empathise with my struggles too.
My only regret with the book is that I could have read it slower to take things in more properly but as I connected with the subject matter a lot that proved a struggle.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness
Moderate: Fatphobia, Body shaming, and Alcohol
Minor: Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, and Homophobia
Extremely, extremely brief mention ofseraphiina's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
slow-paced
2.5
I am SO conflicted about this book.
First of all, I had great sympathy for Baek Se-hee. Having struggled with mild depression and anxiety most of my life, I could relate to a lot of her insecurities, and I know it's a huge step to be honest towards yourself; let alone the entire world! I resonated with her thoughts and I found myself thinking that I wish I could meet her and try to convince her that she was absolutely not a mean or bad person; just someone going through a rough time without the proper tools to deal with it.
Here is the big caveat: The format of the novel is a collection of transcripts betqeen Baek Se-Hee and her psychiatrist. Which is honestly interesting and refreshing.
But I found myself SO upset with the psychiatrist. At best, she gave banal advice that even most girlfriends or parents would be able to give. Well-meaning, but not necessarily grounded in any psychological theory. At worst, she seemed condescending and unprofessional, constantly reminding our poor author of how "extreme" she was in her thoughts without giving her proper tools to assess and change the way she was thinking. It was so frustrating to see such a clever and bright young woman be undermined with downright toxic advice such as "try to change your way of thinking 😊" - thanks, I am cured.
I feel the overall message of the novel is positive and I am happy that Baek Se-Hee found some growth and recovery in this subpar therapy and through this writing journey. But as a reader, I found myself wanting to rip my hair out.
I recommend this if you are experiencing similar issues and want to resonate with the fact that you are not alone and things will get better; but look further for actual helpful advice.
First of all, I had great sympathy for Baek Se-hee. Having struggled with mild depression and anxiety most of my life, I could relate to a lot of her insecurities, and I know it's a huge step to be honest towards yourself; let alone the entire world! I resonated with her thoughts and I found myself thinking that I wish I could meet her and try to convince her that she was absolutely not a mean or bad person; just someone going through a rough time without the proper tools to deal with it.
Here is the big caveat: The format of the novel is a collection of transcripts betqeen Baek Se-Hee and her psychiatrist. Which is honestly interesting and refreshing.
But I found myself SO upset with the psychiatrist. At best, she gave banal advice that even most girlfriends or parents would be able to give. Well-meaning, but not necessarily grounded in any psychological theory. At worst, she seemed condescending and unprofessional, constantly reminding our poor author of how "extreme" she was in her thoughts without giving her proper tools to assess and change the way she was thinking. It was so frustrating to see such a clever and bright young woman be undermined with downright toxic advice such as "try to change your way of thinking 😊" - thanks, I am cured.
I feel the overall message of the novel is positive and I am happy that Baek Se-Hee found some growth and recovery in this subpar therapy and through this writing journey. But as a reader, I found myself wanting to rip my hair out.
I recommend this if you are experiencing similar issues and want to resonate with the fact that you are not alone and things will get better; but look further for actual helpful advice.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness
Minor: Alcoholism and Domestic abuse
robinks's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
3.0
The concept was cool, but in practice, I didn’t like how the book was arranged. Each chapter was a random combination of commentary and conversation, making it hard to follow at times, and it was unclear what the timing of the sessions looked like relative to each other. Also, the last chapter suddenly switched gears into short essays, which I didn’t like. Additionally, as a therapist myself, Sehee’s therapist was giving so much advice and perspective packaged as truth that I did not agree with.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Fatphobia, Mental illness, Dysphoria, Body shaming, and Alcohol
Moderate: Child abuse, Classism, Emotional abuse, Bullying, Eating disorder, Abandonment, and Suicidal thoughts
Minor: War, Xenophobia, Alcoholism, Animal death, Domestic abuse, and Lesbophobia
buttongirl22's review
emotional
funny
informative
reflective
medium-paced
4.75
This was a retrospective look at working through one’s issues through therapy. It was heavily relatable and enlightening to read. I found myself seeing my own behavior and thoughts reflected back through a more clear lens. I really enjoyed Baek Se-hee’s writing and candor in this sensitive subject.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Domestic abuse, Suicidal thoughts, and Child abuse
Minor: Alcoholism
nenaveenstra's review against another edition
dark
emotional
informative
fast-paced
2.5
I bought this book, because I heard rave reviews of it on the internet, and because I was intrigued by the title; I assumed that this book would be about finding the little joys in life, but instead it was a collection of conversations with a psychiatrist, interspersed with bits of text that could have been Instagram captions. It was relatable at times, but I wasn’t really inspired or moved at all, I think because all of it was so vague. I bet the author felt really vulnerable writing this book, but it didn’t read as vulnerable, because no specific details were given at all. Details would’ve elevated this book from a collection of transcripts and blog posts, to an actual story.
Maybe it was too early for the author to write this book. A lot of this book consists of figuring out what’s wrong with her, why she is the way she is, and there’s no conclusion at the end. I respect that mental health is a journey, and maybe a never ending one, but I don’t feel like this book did anything at all. It didn’t break any taboos, it didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know, and it didn’t inspire me.
What it did do, however, was show how incompetent mental health professionals can be. It felt very reminiscent of some experiences I’ve had with psychiatrists in the past, and it was frustrating to read how the psychiatrist in this book jumped to conclusions without seeing the full picture, suggested the author had disorders she didn’t really have, and didn’t seem to give any advice that she could actually work with - and if they did, it wasn’t written down. I appreciated, though, that there was a note by the psychiatrist in this book as well, and that they recognised their flaws.
I related to the author’s experiences quite a bit, and it felt very obvious to me that she was neurodivergent in some way. Not to diagnose someone I’ve never met, but the issues she described were very reminiscent of autistic burnout and depression and anxiety are very often symptoms of ADHD. If you related to this book, too, you might want to look into that.
I feel like this book might be revolutionary in East Asia, and the autism and ADHD diagnoses might not be as common over there, but it did not function well at all in the context of the Western World, and The Netherlands specifically. I also think the way this book was marketed did it dirty. So, unfortunately, I’m only giving this two stars, even though I really wanted to like it.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Physical abuse, Domestic abuse, and Mental illness
llau's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
fast-paced
4.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness
Moderate: Domestic abuse
Minor: Suicidal thoughts
emg3's review against another edition
reflective
fast-paced
4.75
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness
Moderate: Domestic abuse
Minor: Eating disorder
reubenlb's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
slow-paced
3.0
everyone complaining about how bad the therapist is when when it was an uncannily accurate portrayal of my nhs therapy experience - i wish there was more of the postscript reflection, but i think that might have been another book then
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness
Moderate: Alcoholism
Minor: Emotional abuse and Domestic abuse
khakipantsofsex's review against another edition
emotional
mysterious
3.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness
Moderate: Domestic abuse, Body shaming, and Eating disorder
Minor: Suicidal thoughts and Suicide
tlindhorst's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
sad
slow-paced
3.0
Written by a 20 something Korean woman about her struggles with depression & self-judgment. A helpful read for cross cultural mental health issues.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Fatphobia, Alcohol, Mental illness, Body shaming, Suicidal thoughts, Domestic abuse, and Dysphoria
The author’s experience of domestic violence as a child is never connected to her mental health issues