Reviews - Frighten the Horses

96 reviews for:

Frighten the Horses

Oliver Radclyffe

4.41 AVERAGE

gingersnake's review against another edition

4.0

emotional reflective medium-paced

coco18's review against another edition

5.0

Cried so much reading this. A really special book.

jcstokes95's review against another edition

2.25

emotional hopeful informative reflective medium-paced

When there is a type of story that needs to be told, I really struggle with rating it poorly. I cannot imagine this sort of modern, first person narrative of transitioning from female to male is readily available. There should be so many more memoirs like this, especially as politicians and mainstream media chose to create their own false narratives of trans experience.

All that said, this book frustrated me quite a bit. While there are sections that are compulsively readable and high drama, it lacks a deep self-investigation and honesty that makes a memoir exceptional. You get the sense throughout, that everyone is an enemy of Oliver’s journey. People feel more like obstacles and props than like actual people. It feels like Radclyffe is doing a lot of purposeful positioning and shining stories up. This is most visible in how he discusses the breakup of a meaningful romantic relationship with a lesbian. There are parts of this story that feel unfair to her (even though she herself is complicated).

I just could not get over the fact that so many chapters of his life felt like they neatly fit in a box. Like there were no complications in coming out to parents who were deeply homophobic their whole lives. Like every obstacle was dealt with once. I also found myself shocked at how politically unengaged the author was before his own journey of self-discovery. To read this, you’d think Radclyffe transitioned in the 60s when there was no content about queer lives. But it was the 2000s. Clearly, the author comes from a very privileged background. To his credit, he readily admits that and seems to own that he was withdrawn from politics. But so much of the political engagement from him and his parents felt uninterested until it was their own lives at stake. I guess I’m trying to say, this narrator doesn’t feel sympathetic but is painting themselves sympathetically often.

I feel like a hater, so I will say, this is extremely readable. The first few chapters are quite a bit rocky, but Radclyffe clearly knows how to keep a story running with the juiciest bits. I think overall, the writing style was a bit too bare bones, especially for the kind of book I thought I was going into. But, this is easy to gobble up quickly and that’s good, because the more exposure to these ideas people get, the better.

Also, I did really like the exploration of how “switching side”, for lack of a better term, changed his relationship to women. This is the sort of thing that is so complicated and I want even more writing on in the future. I think many people will enjoy this book and I seem to be the outlier here, so glad it is finding its audience.

Content Warnings