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4.04 AVERAGE
4.04 AVERAGE
It was interesting to hear other women's perspectives and also infuriating to read most of the time. It felt more like an opinion piece to me more than anything else though.
This has aged somehow, being written during the Obama administration and pre Me Too - and yet, it is still relevant and compelling. Highly recommend it to mothers and daughters alike - probably fathers, too.
This is a great book for parents of girls and boys! We have sex shamed so much in our culture. I hope I can implement some of her feedback here with my kids so that they have healthy relationships growing into adults.
(tw: sex, sexual assault, abuse) this was a really interesting overview of how (mostly) teenagers understand and experience sex, including the power dynamics created by the societal understanding that sex is about pleasure for boys, and girls as a vessel to provide it. there is also a ton about understanding of consent, and responses once it's violated. it's really solution oriented, which makes it great for parents or figures like teachers.
there were a few things i had wished were addressed more or at all: more about queer sex, more about exceptions in religious communities like soaking and more about how sex can be impacted by childhood sexual abuse.
there were a few things i had wished were addressed more or at all: more about queer sex, more about exceptions in religious communities like soaking and more about how sex can be impacted by childhood sexual abuse.
Such an important book, especially for parents of teens, both boys and girls. I feel a bit of despair about how we will ever develop a healthy sexual ethic--for ourselves and for our kids.
If you keep up with news and the latest writings about adolescence and sexuality, nothing in this book will be particularly shocking or revelatory, but it was nice to see anecdote and research all pulled together. Also, I think most women will not be particularly shocked by some of the attitudes expressed and the contrast between adolescent feelings and their actions. Orenstein has a nice bibliography at the end that's worth a look-see.
I would recommend this book both for parents (of any gender), and also young people. I think young people would get a lot out of hearing their peers talk about their own sexual development and experiences. Girls could feel less alone and boys might get a tiny glimpse at the complicated world of sex beyond the dimensionless porn they sneak through incognito tabs on their smart phones.
Ultimately, no one escapes the years of sexual development unscathed, but I don't necessarily think the point is to remain unscathed. Rather, young people should be able to navigate their own sexual landscape purposefully, with thought and knowledge. This book is a nice addition to our arsenal as parents.
I would recommend this book both for parents (of any gender), and also young people. I think young people would get a lot out of hearing their peers talk about their own sexual development and experiences. Girls could feel less alone and boys might get a tiny glimpse at the complicated world of sex beyond the dimensionless porn they sneak through incognito tabs on their smart phones.
Ultimately, no one escapes the years of sexual development unscathed, but I don't necessarily think the point is to remain unscathed. Rather, young people should be able to navigate their own sexual landscape purposefully, with thought and knowledge. This book is a nice addition to our arsenal as parents.
Spellbinding. If you are a mom to girls -or boys!- read. This. Book. It will open your eyes to the world now and fit together pieces of your own puzzled past that you forgot even existed . I learned so much from this book. I highly recommend it.
I was disappointed in the shallow pool of diversity among contributors to the writer's anecdotal research. They were overwhelmingly white and enrolled in residential, four-year colleges and universities. In fact, I had difficulty differentiating among them. Most were willing participants in the college hookup culture fueled by massive amounts of alcohol, but expected their equally impaired partners to be responsible for knowing where the line between consensual sex and rape was drawn, even if they consented to the sexual activity at the time, to avoid hurting his feelings or being seen as a tease --but later believed they'd been raped. I'd like to have a peek at statistics on rape when the woman is sober. I expect many of my peers, especially those with daughters, feel very differently.