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3.91 AVERAGE
3.91 AVERAGE
3.5 stars. Therapy homework. A fair variety of relationships were portrayed, but primarily focused on the perspective of partnerships and affairs, which does not apply to me. I got a few good nuggets, but I still don’t feel totally empowered by this book the way I thought/hoped I would.
So, I found this one last “self help” book from that time I went to my favorite giant bookstore after my marriage ended and I gathered a number of these books, only to read them years later. Well YOU GUYS, this one is for you.
If you are human, trying to be a human, or trying to be a better human...this book is for you. I really think most people would get something out of reading this. It doesn’t promote ways to ALWAYS FORGIVE AND HOLIER THAN THOU BECAUSE I FORGIVE YOU. It acknowledges that ALL human relationships are messy, complicated, and people can get hurt and do hurtful things to each other.
I feel like this is a book about healing, and ways to better manage your emotions, your thought processes, and really helpful ways to communicate openly and honestly. Which is something I think most people struggle with and something I desperately crave out of whether it is romantic, familial, or friendship. I thought the section targeted to the offender was interesting as well, meaning the book touches base on both sides of the issue and offers helpful insight to parties on either side.
I’m too sleepy as of this moment of writing to give better detail or insight but I do give this book a heavy recommend. (*NOTE- there are multiple mentions of forms of abuse, physical and sexual within this book, just as a warning for those who are sensitive to those matters.
Get this. Read this. Grow
If you are human, trying to be a human, or trying to be a better human...this book is for you. I really think most people would get something out of reading this. It doesn’t promote ways to ALWAYS FORGIVE AND HOLIER THAN THOU BECAUSE I FORGIVE YOU. It acknowledges that ALL human relationships are messy, complicated, and people can get hurt and do hurtful things to each other.
I feel like this is a book about healing, and ways to better manage your emotions, your thought processes, and really helpful ways to communicate openly and honestly. Which is something I think most people struggle with and something I desperately crave out of whether it is romantic, familial, or friendship. I thought the section targeted to the offender was interesting as well, meaning the book touches base on both sides of the issue and offers helpful insight to parties on either side.
I’m too sleepy as of this moment of writing to give better detail or insight but I do give this book a heavy recommend. (*NOTE- there are multiple mentions of forms of abuse, physical and sexual within this book, just as a warning for those who are sensitive to those matters.
Get this. Read this. Grow
Not sure this is a 5 star book. It was for me because it spoke to a critical issue and need in my life, but not sure it would resonate the same with another if I recommended it to someone who was in a similar situation. I love the way she writes about what forgiveness really is. Forgiving myself is huge. Clear cut guidelines for the offender about what you need from them is so so good. Helped me move from the emotional piece to the practical, tangible piece.
An important topic. Really made me
Think about forgiveness and what it really means to forgive. I agree with Dr. Abrahams Spring for the most part. This book has helped me better forgive or accept the people that have wronged me and myself.
Think about forgiveness and what it really means to forgive. I agree with Dr. Abrahams Spring for the most part. This book has helped me better forgive or accept the people that have wronged me and myself.
challenging
informative
reflective
The subtitle: The Courage to Forgive, the Freedom Not To. For anyone who has been hurt by someone in their life and cannot find a way to move on. Dr. Springer discusses four kinds of forgiveness: Cheap Forgiveness, Refusing to Forgive, Acceptance and Genuine Forgiveness. Acceptance is one avenue that is not offered to us from those who insist "we must forgive to find peace." Acceptance is an alternate route to take when the other party is unwilling or unavailable to participate in the process of Genuine Forgiveness. Rich in examples and expansion on all of the concepts, this is not a pat presentation, but a thoughtful, REAL, and very human approach to dealing with complex feelings of hurt, anger and respect for ourselves.
Very readable and insightful.
Very readable and insightful.
emotional
reflective
slow-paced
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
This book had good exercises and thought starters; very solid point to understand the intricacies of forgiveness. How to ask for it, how to react when someone else asks you for it, and everything in between. Wish I'd found it years ago.
I've never read a book on forgiveness apart from a religious bias. Spring pulls from all walks of life to craft How Can I Forgive You? Quoting Rabis, Pastors, Life Coaches, and Yogis. Her years of marriage counseling come in to play in her scenarios and experience but it's a book for anyone who has ever been hurt and isn't sure how to create forgiveness from the wounds. I'm passionate about forgiveness but my body count of people I've actually been able to absolve is low. I read this in a time where the overwhelming anger and guilt I had toward the people I had been unable to let go of was distracting me from my day to day and I was desperate for new answers.
Spring approach is not that forgiveness is the end all, the holy grail of emotional enlightenment. She's the first author I've read that offers acceptance as a path of healing. I read the chapter where she outlines that the act of accepting the injustice, accepting the anger and the grief and the rage, accepting the dues you will never receive and the pain that you've suffered, and ultimately accepting the reality and allowing yourself to move on. She argues kindly for the case of forgiveness as well but even more so that the victim can and should choose whatever path they feel comforted the most in.
I especially appreciated the chapter directed to the person seeking forgiveness. Spring's experience with complicated perpetrators shines through in her empathy but take-no-prisoners-accept-no-bullshit attitude is tonally perfect. There are people who I have/should ask forgiveness of and to be talked to in such a direct way was a respect that few resources offer.
I think anyone who has ever been in an emotional relationship should give this a read. I didn't forgive anyone after finishing it but I did offer acceptance to the people that I've given the majority of my anger too and I breathed a little easier after. 4 stars.
Spring approach is not that forgiveness is the end all, the holy grail of emotional enlightenment. She's the first author I've read that offers acceptance as a path of healing. I read the chapter where she outlines that the act of accepting the injustice, accepting the anger and the grief and the rage, accepting the dues you will never receive and the pain that you've suffered, and ultimately accepting the reality and allowing yourself to move on. She argues kindly for the case of forgiveness as well but even more so that the victim can and should choose whatever path they feel comforted the most in.
I especially appreciated the chapter directed to the person seeking forgiveness. Spring's experience with complicated perpetrators shines through in her empathy but take-no-prisoners-accept-no-bullshit attitude is tonally perfect. There are people who I have/should ask forgiveness of and to be talked to in such a direct way was a respect that few resources offer.
I think anyone who has ever been in an emotional relationship should give this a read. I didn't forgive anyone after finishing it but I did offer acceptance to the people that I've given the majority of my anger too and I breathed a little easier after. 4 stars.