Scan barcode
pwlindley's review against another edition
emotional
funny
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
michie_1987's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.25
yikesbmg's review against another edition
3.0
My actual rating is a 3.5 but that’s not an option on Goodreads. This book takes on a subject, a question that I am really trying to answer: how to build a life that’s not centered around or defined by a singular romantic relationship and a nuclear family. It is a hard thing to square, especially in the American context.
Because I really want an answer, I expected a lot from this book (I am trying to be clear about my bias here…) and it didn’t deliver enough. It just wasn’t satisfying enough. I wanted Birdsong to keep digging, get more specific about the mechanics of alternative lifestyles but it was mostly anecdotal stories that were a only few pages each. What I got from this book was: American dream is a lie that’s unachievable and the closer you get, the less satisfied you are AND black single women and LGBT people have created alternatives that are difficult in their own way. I knew this before picking up this book.
I think if you already know you want to build a life like the one I describe above, this book isn’t going to be an instructional manual (nor does it claim to be one). If you are like me and have friends that maybe don’t think about building a life like the one you want, this might be a good book to gift them. It makes good arguments, introduces important questions, and provides some examples — it might convince those friends! But if you are already certain the American dream of a heterosexual traditional marriage, two and a half kids, and a house isn’t for you then I’m not sure this book will meet your needs.
Because I really want an answer, I expected a lot from this book (I am trying to be clear about my bias here…) and it didn’t deliver enough. It just wasn’t satisfying enough. I wanted Birdsong to keep digging, get more specific about the mechanics of alternative lifestyles but it was mostly anecdotal stories that were a only few pages each. What I got from this book was: American dream is a lie that’s unachievable and the closer you get, the less satisfied you are AND black single women and LGBT people have created alternatives that are difficult in their own way. I knew this before picking up this book.
I think if you already know you want to build a life like the one I describe above, this book isn’t going to be an instructional manual (nor does it claim to be one). If you are like me and have friends that maybe don’t think about building a life like the one you want, this might be a good book to gift them. It makes good arguments, introduces important questions, and provides some examples — it might convince those friends! But if you are already certain the American dream of a heterosexual traditional marriage, two and a half kids, and a house isn’t for you then I’m not sure this book will meet your needs.
19kalwhi's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
stephanieridiculous's review against another edition
5.0
This is a great resource for inspiring creative thinking when it comes to community building. If you're already familiar with dynamic non-traditional relationship building you may not find too much in here, but if you're longing for better systems of support (that go both way) and don't have much exposure to out of the box thinking in this arena I think this is a great read. Birdsong gives us examples from her own life along from the multitude of people she interviewed and talked with.
This isn't really a how to, but moreso a whyfor. Birdsong explores the benefits of redefining community, friendship, and family so that we're all in relationships that help us thrive and focus on vulnerability and intimacy, but she doesn't spend a lot of time giving action items. I don't mention this to imply it's a deficit, but more to help temper expectations. This is an introductory book, not a manual. Approach it with curiosity and take the questions it inspires to those you're in community with, or hope to be in community with, and hopefully something wonderful can come from it.
This isn't really a how to, but moreso a whyfor. Birdsong explores the benefits of redefining community, friendship, and family so that we're all in relationships that help us thrive and focus on vulnerability and intimacy, but she doesn't spend a lot of time giving action items. I don't mention this to imply it's a deficit, but more to help temper expectations. This is an introductory book, not a manual. Approach it with curiosity and take the questions it inspires to those you're in community with, or hope to be in community with, and hopefully something wonderful can come from it.
alimalina's review against another edition
4.0
very helpful in imagining the future and present we want and imagine
kittybd's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
slow-paced
4.75