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4.02 AVERAGE
4.02 AVERAGE
A little gem amidst the hysterical, positive thinking, self-help literature.
The basic premise of the book is that the effort to try to feel happy is often precisely the thing that makes us miserable. Some of us probably know this to be true, and yet we can’t help ourselves. We want to feel secure. Alas, as individuals, we have very little control over the the universe. Yet, in order to defend ourselves, we build up “fortifications” of the ego. But it is those very fortifications that create the feeling of insecurity: because building a fort means isolating oneself. The deep truth is that insecurity is another word for life.
There are no one-size fits all self-help tricks or ten points plans that deliver happiness. Life and therefore happiness, is complicated. It can and will go wrong. You preparation for hard times will define your level of happiness.There’s convincing evidence that spending time and energy thinking about how well things could go, actually reduces most people’s motivation to achieve them.
This usually means stress.
When feeling (mildly) stressed, just try the following. Ask yourself the question: do I have a problem now? It will do wonders. At least it does to me.
The good news is that there’s an antidote. There are other ways of reaching happiness. Embrace the things that you try to escape. As those familiar with the stoics already know: embracing, instead of fighting, negative emotions will make one happier.
Please read the whole thing, as the book is full of delightful research, insightful encounters and essential debunking of quasi-truths and biases.
Any self help doctor, looking to really help his patient should prescribe a good shot of this well written, funny and balanced antidote. At least once a year, preferably on a monthly basis.
The basic premise of the book is that the effort to try to feel happy is often precisely the thing that makes us miserable. Some of us probably know this to be true, and yet we can’t help ourselves. We want to feel secure. Alas, as individuals, we have very little control over the the universe. Yet, in order to defend ourselves, we build up “fortifications” of the ego. But it is those very fortifications that create the feeling of insecurity: because building a fort means isolating oneself. The deep truth is that insecurity is another word for life.
There are no one-size fits all self-help tricks or ten points plans that deliver happiness. Life and therefore happiness, is complicated. It can and will go wrong. You preparation for hard times will define your level of happiness.There’s convincing evidence that spending time and energy thinking about how well things could go, actually reduces most people’s motivation to achieve them.
This usually means stress.
When feeling (mildly) stressed, just try the following. Ask yourself the question: do I have a problem now? It will do wonders. At least it does to me.
The good news is that there’s an antidote. There are other ways of reaching happiness. Embrace the things that you try to escape. As those familiar with the stoics already know: embracing, instead of fighting, negative emotions will make one happier.
Please read the whole thing, as the book is full of delightful research, insightful encounters and essential debunking of quasi-truths and biases.
Any self help doctor, looking to really help his patient should prescribe a good shot of this well written, funny and balanced antidote. At least once a year, preferably on a monthly basis.
challenging
funny
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
informative
reflective
fast-paced
Burkerman tells an engaging story about his search for the negative path of happiness. He always backs his claims with research and highligths studies that wanders off the beaten path of popular psychology. I really enjoyed this book full of simple, yet profound insights spiced up with subtle humor.
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
3.5 stars. In many ways, this was simply preaching to the choir for me. 100% positive thinking (or for that matter, 100% negative thinking) is impossible to live by. Negativity and realism has to balance out the positive. Use the negative to get to the positive is the bare-bones moral I got from this.
challenging
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
funny
slow-paced
The Short Answer
An insightful look at the potential pitfalls of positive thinking and the many benefits of accepting or embracing some of the less pleasant parts of life. While I feel there could have been more of a uniting thread going through the core of this book, I still found it to be an incredibly refreshing and thoughtful read that has definitely changed my life for the better.
The Long Answer
I grabbed this book on a whim not entirely sure if it was really worth reading. I've read all sorts of books on productivity, goal setting, happiness, or 'self-improvement' and felt I had gotten about as much as I was going to out of most of those books. On top of it all, very little of it seemed to be clicking. If anything I was more overwhelmed than I was before I tried to start improving my life.
Because of all that the title to this grabbed me. I put a hold on it at the library and promptly forgot all about it. A year later it finally became available when I had nothing to read and I gave it a shot. Man, I wish I'd read this earlier. The book delves into a lot of philosophical ideas such as stoicism, Buddhism, or the nature of mortality. It makes the concepts relatable and easy to understand, while also looking at any research that has been done looking into the various concepts discussed.
It never delves super deep into each concept, giving you just enough to get the concepts and ideas without hitting you on the head with specifics. There is plenty of literature on the specific topics should you be interested, and the author gives you some hints as to where to look should you be interested. Because of all of this the book gives a very solid overview of how embracing the less pleasant parts of the world may actually make us happier and more satisfied as all. It's a perfect primer to the ideas, and for most people will be all they need.
Highly recommend this book to anyone who's tried the whole positivity thing and found it a bit sour. Even if you love the whole positive thinking idea this would still be an excellent book to read to round out your perspectives. While it's not perfect I'm still exceedingly happy I read this.
An insightful look at the potential pitfalls of positive thinking and the many benefits of accepting or embracing some of the less pleasant parts of life. While I feel there could have been more of a uniting thread going through the core of this book, I still found it to be an incredibly refreshing and thoughtful read that has definitely changed my life for the better.
The Long Answer
I grabbed this book on a whim not entirely sure if it was really worth reading. I've read all sorts of books on productivity, goal setting, happiness, or 'self-improvement' and felt I had gotten about as much as I was going to out of most of those books. On top of it all, very little of it seemed to be clicking. If anything I was more overwhelmed than I was before I tried to start improving my life.
Because of all that the title to this grabbed me. I put a hold on it at the library and promptly forgot all about it. A year later it finally became available when I had nothing to read and I gave it a shot. Man, I wish I'd read this earlier. The book delves into a lot of philosophical ideas such as stoicism, Buddhism, or the nature of mortality. It makes the concepts relatable and easy to understand, while also looking at any research that has been done looking into the various concepts discussed.
It never delves super deep into each concept, giving you just enough to get the concepts and ideas without hitting you on the head with specifics. There is plenty of literature on the specific topics should you be interested, and the author gives you some hints as to where to look should you be interested. Because of all of this the book gives a very solid overview of how embracing the less pleasant parts of the world may actually make us happier and more satisfied as all. It's a perfect primer to the ideas, and for most people will be all they need.
Highly recommend this book to anyone who's tried the whole positivity thing and found it a bit sour. Even if you love the whole positive thinking idea this would still be an excellent book to read to round out your perspectives. While it's not perfect I'm still exceedingly happy I read this.
This is an excellent antidote and prescription for authentic happiness.