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4.11 AVERAGE
4.11 AVERAGE
I'm sure there are a lot of similar books around, and while I can't compare this one to them, what I can say is that I loved the concept of these dates. It helped us center our conversations around a particular topic in a particular setting, while letting us apply our own modifications that suited our relationship and our personalities.
No matter at which stage of your relationship you are, I highly recommend checking it out if you are looking for a tool to guide you through important conversations which are necessary for the health and duration of your relationship.
No matter at which stage of your relationship you are, I highly recommend checking it out if you are looking for a tool to guide you through important conversations which are necessary for the health and duration of your relationship.
After seven years of marriage and one kid - this was an interactive and timely book to read with my partner. I enjoyed the more practical aspects of this book: the questionnaires, open ended conversation starters, etc. It lead us to some really great conversations. A word to the wise! Do NOT get the AUDIOBOOK. Don’t make my same mistake unless you want to listen to the most robotic human voices I’ve ever heard give you advice on your love life.
I’m buying this book for anyone getting married from now on. It’s a great exercise for all stages of couples: newly dating, contemplating co-habitating, married for 6 years…
You all have to commit to it and then it’s super enlightening. (I think it would actually be unhelpful if only one partner read it.) I’ve been with my partner for over a decade and we loved the practice of the dates. My advice is: plan out when you’re having all eight dates on your shared calendars in advance and then dive in and go with the flow each date. Super helpful relationship resource. We’ve started to return to some of the resources in conflict and they are a great support.
You all have to commit to it and then it’s super enlightening. (I think it would actually be unhelpful if only one partner read it.) I’ve been with my partner for over a decade and we loved the practice of the dates. My advice is: plan out when you’re having all eight dates on your shared calendars in advance and then dive in and go with the flow each date. Super helpful relationship resource. We’ve started to return to some of the resources in conflict and they are a great support.
I will probably purchase a copy of this book, just to have all of the exercises and conversation questions available on-hand. Great work from John Gottman, this book provides excellent jumping-off points for meaningful conversations with your partner.
Really eye opening about how easy it can be to keep a relationship together while also be incredibly difficult. Read this after a breakup and was a wonderful reflection. I recommend this book to everyone in a relationship
informative
reflective
medium-paced
My therapist recommended this book and I’m happy to say I’m no longer seeing that therapist. The plus side is this book made me feel so good about my relationship because every single piece of advice was the most basic common sense and I feel like if any of this is profound to someone in a relationship, they probably shouldn’t be in that relationship in the first place. Not to mention the incorrect information about how dopamine works and vaguely misogynistic anecdotes sprinkled throughout the book.
This isn’t literary-wise the top of a poetic heap of relationship-boosting prose. It’s an excellent reframing of relationships and simple question guide that if you follow will churn up the sore spots and potentially elevate your relationship to unseen levels of intimacy.
Why the 5 stars ⭐️ for a books that seems so basic?
Books don’t change our lives, but they can confuse, they can distort, they can distract, and they provide the kindling to stoke rumination and resentment. Or, as in the case with Eight Dates, they can offer some clarity, they can positively reframe and provide a new angle, they can offer a chance to focus, they can bring insights from the pages of scientific studies and they can provide the easy-access doorways to rooms where healthy growth work can be done.
I’d recommend this to any type of couple abs especially anyone in a committed relationship.
Instead of worrying about “when should I leave?” And “when should I stay” it reframes the entire topic out of solutions and into the practice of sharing and hearing. The only way this book has value is if you and your person actually DO the dates. The insights are only in yourself and your partner. But this is an area where the wrong questions and wrong angle can be devastating or needlessly painful. So they matter a great deal.
For some I hope things become clear that they can’t accept - relationships that need to be rent always should be no matter the fear of the unknown. And for most, I hope, this book helps pave an approach to each other that makes it easier to turn away from the many temptations to resent each other’s annoyances and differences and makes acceptance and intimacy a daily practice.
Trying and trying. Been reading this book with my heart for more than a year as we’ve done the dates, had gaps, had tears, had so much more ease added to a long relationship, and had all the energy rejuvenated to where I can’t see us not running the 8 dates regularly- every year or two.
Why the 5 stars ⭐️ for a books that seems so basic?
Books don’t change our lives, but they can confuse, they can distort, they can distract, and they provide the kindling to stoke rumination and resentment. Or, as in the case with Eight Dates, they can offer some clarity, they can positively reframe and provide a new angle, they can offer a chance to focus, they can bring insights from the pages of scientific studies and they can provide the easy-access doorways to rooms where healthy growth work can be done.
I’d recommend this to any type of couple abs especially anyone in a committed relationship.
Instead of worrying about “when should I leave?” And “when should I stay” it reframes the entire topic out of solutions and into the practice of sharing and hearing. The only way this book has value is if you and your person actually DO the dates. The insights are only in yourself and your partner. But this is an area where the wrong questions and wrong angle can be devastating or needlessly painful. So they matter a great deal.
For some I hope things become clear that they can’t accept - relationships that need to be rent always should be no matter the fear of the unknown. And for most, I hope, this book helps pave an approach to each other that makes it easier to turn away from the many temptations to resent each other’s annoyances and differences and makes acceptance and intimacy a daily practice.
Trying and trying. Been reading this book with my heart for more than a year as we’ve done the dates, had gaps, had tears, had so much more ease added to a long relationship, and had all the energy rejuvenated to where I can’t see us not running the 8 dates regularly- every year or two.
Mom recommended this book. Very good dates and questions to keep communication open and relationship and love growing and evolving throughout life. I listened on audible, but I want to buy the paper book too because it has so much good content. This book would be helpful to couples at any stage of relationship.
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
A bit conflicted with this one because I learned nothing new, but that doesn't mean this book isn't valuable. It contains lots of reflective questions and ideas. If you've heard of the Gottman's then this won't be groundbreaking.