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kelly_e's review against another edition
informative
inspiring
medium-paced
4.75
Thank you to St. Martin's Press for providing me with an e-ARC via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
4.75 stars
"We're not talking about the fact than an estimated 176 million people worldwide live with endometriosis, and around one in ten people with vaginas will experience some sort of vaginal or pelvic pain in their lifetime. We're not talking about painful sex, or painful orgasms, or periods that are so debilitating they keep you home from work or school. That's what we should be talking about."
This is Lara Parker's first person account of her life living with endometriosis, and other aliments she dubs her Vagina Problems. It is her story, but it is also the story of so many women around the world. She delves deep into the details of how living with chronic pain has impacted every facet of her life since the age of 14. She explores the shame and stigma she felt; the agonizing struggle to be heard by her doctors, to the point of blaming herself; and the general lack of information and support available relating to women's sexual health problems.
From the very first line, I was simply immersed in Lara's honest account of living with chronic pain. Her determination and perseverance are inspiring. Her vulnerability and rawness are empowering. Her dialogue and humour are educational and informative. And it is absolutely heart-wrenching to know her (and so many other women) are not seen or heard. At times her writing gets repetitive, but given the nature of the subject matter I cannot fault her here. These illnesses are real and this book should definitely help raise awareness and normalize talking about taboo topics surrounding women's sexual health. As heart-breaking as it is to learn so many girls suffer in silence, Lara offers hope.
As Lara says herself, Vagina Problems is the book she wished she had back when she was searching for answers, and for that reason I highly recommend it to anyone experiencing their own vagina issues. For this book to be truly transformative it is a MUST read for all women, but even more importantly for men. It is our chance to all inch a little closer to understanding, and offer a much more compassionate approach. Approximately half of the world's population has a vagina, and yet no one wants to talk about them. It is time that changes, and with this book Lara certainly helps create a safe space for women to talk about their sexual health problems.
Favourite Quotes
"What I needed was a book that told me that I wasn't alone - and one that gave me permission to just be upset about going through this."
"Despite the havoc endometriosis has wreaked on my life, it's also shown me my own strength. It has forced me to face my biggest fears time and time again and prove to myself that I can get through them. It has given me the beautiful ability to experience not only sympathy for others who are suffering, but true empathy. It has made me a fighter - not just against this disease, but against any and all bullshit in my life. It has forced me to appreciate the little moments in life a bit more, because to me, they really are so fleeting. It has forced me to appreciate my resilience, even when I am not feeling particularly durable. And because of endometriosis, I know how to listen to my body. Despite all this, if given the choice, I would obviously still choose not to deal with it. I would always choose that. Always. But in many ways, I would not be who I am today if I did not have endometriosis. And although it's difficult to see on my bad days - the person I am is pretty fucking great."
"All I ask is for space to feel how I feel. We all deserve that. All of us."
"Most of the time, I try to just let myself feel what I feel. Being able to admit my sadness, my anger, my frustration... all of it... is the only way I have found to make peace with this because I did not choose for my life to be defined this way."
"But when you whole existence feels like a burden, asking for even more help isn't as easy as it may seem."
4.75 stars
"We're not talking about the fact than an estimated 176 million people worldwide live with endometriosis, and around one in ten people with vaginas will experience some sort of vaginal or pelvic pain in their lifetime. We're not talking about painful sex, or painful orgasms, or periods that are so debilitating they keep you home from work or school. That's what we should be talking about."
This is Lara Parker's first person account of her life living with endometriosis, and other aliments she dubs her Vagina Problems. It is her story, but it is also the story of so many women around the world. She delves deep into the details of how living with chronic pain has impacted every facet of her life since the age of 14. She explores the shame and stigma she felt; the agonizing struggle to be heard by her doctors, to the point of blaming herself; and the general lack of information and support available relating to women's sexual health problems.
From the very first line, I was simply immersed in Lara's honest account of living with chronic pain. Her determination and perseverance are inspiring. Her vulnerability and rawness are empowering. Her dialogue and humour are educational and informative. And it is absolutely heart-wrenching to know her (and so many other women) are not seen or heard. At times her writing gets repetitive, but given the nature of the subject matter I cannot fault her here. These illnesses are real and this book should definitely help raise awareness and normalize talking about taboo topics surrounding women's sexual health. As heart-breaking as it is to learn so many girls suffer in silence, Lara offers hope.
As Lara says herself, Vagina Problems is the book she wished she had back when she was searching for answers, and for that reason I highly recommend it to anyone experiencing their own vagina issues. For this book to be truly transformative it is a MUST read for all women, but even more importantly for men. It is our chance to all inch a little closer to understanding, and offer a much more compassionate approach. Approximately half of the world's population has a vagina, and yet no one wants to talk about them. It is time that changes, and with this book Lara certainly helps create a safe space for women to talk about their sexual health problems.
Favourite Quotes
"What I needed was a book that told me that I wasn't alone - and one that gave me permission to just be upset about going through this."
"Despite the havoc endometriosis has wreaked on my life, it's also shown me my own strength. It has forced me to face my biggest fears time and time again and prove to myself that I can get through them. It has given me the beautiful ability to experience not only sympathy for others who are suffering, but true empathy. It has made me a fighter - not just against this disease, but against any and all bullshit in my life. It has forced me to appreciate the little moments in life a bit more, because to me, they really are so fleeting. It has forced me to appreciate my resilience, even when I am not feeling particularly durable. And because of endometriosis, I know how to listen to my body. Despite all this, if given the choice, I would obviously still choose not to deal with it. I would always choose that. Always. But in many ways, I would not be who I am today if I did not have endometriosis. And although it's difficult to see on my bad days - the person I am is pretty fucking great."
"All I ask is for space to feel how I feel. We all deserve that. All of us."
"Most of the time, I try to just let myself feel what I feel. Being able to admit my sadness, my anger, my frustration... all of it... is the only way I have found to make peace with this because I did not choose for my life to be defined this way."
"But when you whole existence feels like a burden, asking for even more help isn't as easy as it may seem."
marlene_anna's review against another edition
5.0
I highly recommend everyone affected or everyone who knows someone affected to read this.
Especially when it comes to those issues, it can be a lonely, isolated road for those living with them, and this book breaks the stigma by putting into words what it feels like to live with this in a world like ours.
Especially when it comes to those issues, it can be a lonely, isolated road for those living with them, and this book breaks the stigma by putting into words what it feels like to live with this in a world like ours.
writingbookscoffee's review against another edition
4.0
Thank you to NetGalley, St. Martin's Griffin and the author for this free ARC. It's such an important topic and I think everyone on Earth needs to hear about it and read this book. It's complete BS how much funding and research has gone into men's health problems vs. women's. And the fact that endo and Vagina Problems are so misunderstood still in 2020 is ridiculous. I've had my own share of Vagina Problems that still have not been diagnosed, and the amount of gaslighting that happens with "women's issues" is insane. It's also a necessary story to hear about chronic illness, so the rest of us can gain some empathy.
megabooks's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
reflective
sad
medium-paced
4.0
bookmarksandcaffeine's review against another edition
I don't give star ratings to memoirs as it's not my place to rate someone's experience/life story. I was expecting something different .. something more short story/essay-esq about her experiences but this was mostly just a high level "this pain sucks." Which I believe her and I feel for her but I didn't necessarily learn anything or relate to this book (even though I have my own version of chronic pain.) I appreciate her drawing attention to this disease as MANY women have it and it isn't really talked about. If you suffer from endo/vagina problems and want to feel heard/seen - this book is for you!
literary_lizard's review against another edition
4.0
I sincerely hope that anyone who ever experiences any sort of vagina problem finds this book, or at the very least, a standalone article by Lara Parker talking about her experiences with various vagina problem. This is such an important issue that effects SO MANY WOMEN, and we never really talk about it. As someone who is pretty sure they have an undiagnosed vagina problem, I'm so glad I found this book and have friends I can openly and honestly talk to.
In VAGINA PROBLEMS, the author very honestly discusses various aspects of her life, from dating to work, navigating the medical system, and dealing with difficult mental health spirals that having a chronic illness brings with it. She is very up front about how difficult it is dealing with her multiple conditions, but also takes times to note the good things, too. I really appreciated her open, honest dialogue throughout this book, and her advice for when it comes to fighting for yourself and standing up against health professionals who may not believe your pain is real. No one knows your body better than yourself, and you deserve to see a medical professional who will listen to your concerns and take them seriously.
Again, I cannot emphasize how important and powerful this book is. I hope those who need it find it, and it helps shed some light on a very important topic that needs more attention.
Thank you to the publisher for sending me an electronic copy of this book via NetGalley.
In VAGINA PROBLEMS, the author very honestly discusses various aspects of her life, from dating to work, navigating the medical system, and dealing with difficult mental health spirals that having a chronic illness brings with it. She is very up front about how difficult it is dealing with her multiple conditions, but also takes times to note the good things, too. I really appreciated her open, honest dialogue throughout this book, and her advice for when it comes to fighting for yourself and standing up against health professionals who may not believe your pain is real. No one knows your body better than yourself, and you deserve to see a medical professional who will listen to your concerns and take them seriously.
Again, I cannot emphasize how important and powerful this book is. I hope those who need it find it, and it helps shed some light on a very important topic that needs more attention.
Thank you to the publisher for sending me an electronic copy of this book via NetGalley.
rosalind's review against another edition
dark
emotional
informative
reflective
sad
medium-paced
3.75
Content Warnings
Graphic: Chronic illness, Medical content, Grief, and Medical trauma
Moderate: Drug use, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, and Suicidal thoughts