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3.71 AVERAGE
3.71 AVERAGE
I read this book in a matter of hours. I absolutely adored it and absorbed it as well. It has been a great start to more feminist reads!
"Women are in fact more effective leaders, less likely to take unnecessary risks, great at multitasking, and have higher emotional intelligence-as the 'Harvard Business Review' puts it, 'one of the least counter intuitive findings in the social sciences'"(p. xxvi).
"It's a strange feeling to believe, at your very core, that you're good at something-and yet simultaneously doubt that very things is true"(p.50).
"Being nice shouldn't undermine the perception of a person's competence, yet when it comes to women we tend to view the two traits as inversely related-a surplus of one leading to the belief you're deficient in the other"(p. 115).
"Say, 'I'm not sure I understand. Can you explain?' and put the burden on them to stumble through the explanation" (p.125)
"Try explaining the reason for the emotion (literally:I'm emotional because you fucked up this project). It makes the emotion about the work, not you"(p. 125).
"Used in office scenarios to actually make up for the fact that you don't have an answer, while still managing to give an opinion. 'Well, I don't know who has the time to know everything about [insert topic at hand]-but it's my feeling that we should [insert opinion anyway].' If you can employ it, use it, Men do it all the time"(p. 170).
"Nora Ephson once said that if you slip on a banana peel you are the joke. But if you tell everyone you slipped on a banana peel-well, then it's your laugh"(p. 250).
"A 1967 manifesto by a New York City writer name Valerie Solanas, S.C.U.M. parodied man an an 'incomplete female' who was deficient due to the Y chromosome causing him to be emotionally stunted, egocentric and lacking empathy. It was distributed on two thousand mimeographed copies throughout the village, charging women one dollar and men two dollars"(p. 266).
"It's a strange feeling to believe, at your very core, that you're good at something-and yet simultaneously doubt that very things is true"(p.50).
"Being nice shouldn't undermine the perception of a person's competence, yet when it comes to women we tend to view the two traits as inversely related-a surplus of one leading to the belief you're deficient in the other"(p. 115).
"Say, 'I'm not sure I understand. Can you explain?' and put the burden on them to stumble through the explanation" (p.125)
"Try explaining the reason for the emotion (literally:I'm emotional because you fucked up this project). It makes the emotion about the work, not you"(p. 125).
"Used in office scenarios to actually make up for the fact that you don't have an answer, while still managing to give an opinion. 'Well, I don't know who has the time to know everything about [insert topic at hand]-but it's my feeling that we should [insert opinion anyway].' If you can employ it, use it, Men do it all the time"(p. 170).
"Nora Ephson once said that if you slip on a banana peel you are the joke. But if you tell everyone you slipped on a banana peel-well, then it's your laugh"(p. 250).
"A 1967 manifesto by a New York City writer name Valerie Solanas, S.C.U.M. parodied man an an 'incomplete female' who was deficient due to the Y chromosome causing him to be emotionally stunted, egocentric and lacking empathy. It was distributed on two thousand mimeographed copies throughout the village, charging women one dollar and men two dollars"(p. 266).
Highly useful and pragmatic. I listened to the audiobook version but now I want to get my hands on a hard copy to have as reference. While it could be a bit reductionist and simplistic at times I think it's a great starting place for people who maybe aren't as engaged with feminist principles and offers some really useful strategies for dealing with sexism in the workplace - that casual insidious sexism that is so hard to deal with because it's not as obvious as having your butt pinched by the creepy older male worker, but has just as much possibility to wear women down.
this was very much focused on cis women, and it was really into ‘pussy power’ which whatever, but y’know equating vaginas to womanhood is...not good
A quick read, useful, and entertaining. I would recommend this book to any post-grad woman entering/making her way up in the workforce. The types of misogyny described are all too recognizable, but the author provides useful mechanisms to combat them (or at least cope with/survive them). The author also describes self-defeating and damaging self-talk that women engage in that prevents them from realizing their goals. The author also has great recommendations for how to reprogram yourself out of that internalized self-doubt.
Criticism:
This book is riddled with ... “bropropriations” - how to perform the way a man does in order to be taken seriously. How to pander to the cognitive biases we have regarding images of power (I.e. men in power) and hack those biases to work to our advantage. This, as opposed to making qualities that are valuable but seen as feminine a standard of power, is problematic. We shouldn’t have to not be ourselves to be seen as equal in the workplace. It’s a hard line to walk ... how to gain respect and power in a male-centric work environment while also exhibiting and being proud of a female identity...
Ideally, being nice and being respected, being humble and being ambitious, being emotional and being effective, will not be seen as mutually exclusive, or seen as gendered qualities. Until then, the recommendations in this book are a good way to get your seat at the table and your voice heard, where you can insidiously demonstrate to the world that being the boss and being a woman and having a heart in corporate America is freaking possible. Get more of us in positions of power (without losing sight of what is performance and what is real) and maybe the next generation of women won’t have to deal with this bullshit.
Criticism:
This book is riddled with ... “bropropriations” - how to perform the way a man does in order to be taken seriously. How to pander to the cognitive biases we have regarding images of power (I.e. men in power) and hack those biases to work to our advantage. This, as opposed to making qualities that are valuable but seen as feminine a standard of power, is problematic. We shouldn’t have to not be ourselves to be seen as equal in the workplace. It’s a hard line to walk ... how to gain respect and power in a male-centric work environment while also exhibiting and being proud of a female identity...
Ideally, being nice and being respected, being humble and being ambitious, being emotional and being effective, will not be seen as mutually exclusive, or seen as gendered qualities. Until then, the recommendations in this book are a good way to get your seat at the table and your voice heard, where you can insidiously demonstrate to the world that being the boss and being a woman and having a heart in corporate America is freaking possible. Get more of us in positions of power (without losing sight of what is performance and what is real) and maybe the next generation of women won’t have to deal with this bullshit.
There were some good facts/stats in here, and even some interesting and helpful strategies, but it was all cushioned in vagina puns and awful TERFiness. Hard pass.
Martha rec'd this by referencing the mediocre white dude created to represent that guy in everyone's office, Josh and that's probably the best part of the book. It was definitely worth the read and I will probably give it to my younger co-workers but a lot of it felt like a compilation of stuff I read elsewhere already. Still, I conveniently started this the day before some absurdly sexist behavior happened at work so it was nice to pick up while in a feminist rage/demoralized state.
Rating: more like 3.5.
This was a quick, entertaining, informal read but I wasn’t a huge fan of the format of the book.
This was a quick, entertaining, informal read but I wasn’t a huge fan of the format of the book.
informative
inspiring
medium-paced
definitely skim-read this one, but it had some useful nuggets of advice, boiled down to:
- be confident & don't let other people take credit for your work
- politeness is good, but be firm and don't let people walk over you
- sometimes you have to play hardball to get what you want
- stand up for the other people in your office who get stepped on
-take risks and worry less about the outcome
- be confident & don't let other people take credit for your work
- politeness is good, but be firm and don't let people walk over you
- sometimes you have to play hardball to get what you want
- stand up for the other people in your office who get stepped on
-take risks and worry less about the outcome