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4.15 AVERAGE
4.15 AVERAGE
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
emotional
inspiring
medium-paced
informative
medium-paced
An easy ready tone and pace for all the information you get out of it. Provided clear boundary scripts and explanations. There was one chapter where I didn’t agree with everything, but it’s a great starting point for recovering people-pleasers.
Added a hard copy to my personal collection for reference
I was really disappointed from that book and also taken aback quite a few times. But I guess, I am not the target audience.
This book is for someone who has trouble communicating their boundaries, and has little experience with them. If you are in that category, that’s a great book for you. For the Autor, other people appear in her life in the sole capacity as being threats - so she design a color coded system inspired by DEFCON, to classify them into “green”, “yellow”, and “red”.
Never ever is she addressing the motives, needs and feelings of other people, nor is she ever asking herself “Am I The Asshole?”
The book gives a plethora of practical examples on what to say to communicate and enforce a boundary in all sorts of settings. However you are never explained, how do you come up with those boundaries in the first place - what needs they are addressing and how and when are they actually helping you.
One core sentence that is repeatedly used throughout the book is “if you set boundaries, it’s always good for the other person too, because you are improving your relationship with them”. - you just need to spend 10 seconds to see how this sentence can be so wrong in so many situations, starting with the word “always”.
I would not recommend this book to no one who has done some communication training, or have spent more than 10 minutes exploring the concept of “consent”. But if you really struggling to get even your basic demands across, this book could be a good starting point for you.
This book is for someone who has trouble communicating their boundaries, and has little experience with them. If you are in that category, that’s a great book for you. For the Autor, other people appear in her life in the sole capacity as being threats - so she design a color coded system inspired by DEFCON, to classify them into “green”, “yellow”, and “red”.
Never ever is she addressing the motives, needs and feelings of other people, nor is she ever asking herself “Am I The Asshole?”
The book gives a plethora of practical examples on what to say to communicate and enforce a boundary in all sorts of settings. However you are never explained, how do you come up with those boundaries in the first place - what needs they are addressing and how and when are they actually helping you.
One core sentence that is repeatedly used throughout the book is “if you set boundaries, it’s always good for the other person too, because you are improving your relationship with them”. - you just need to spend 10 seconds to see how this sentence can be so wrong in so many situations, starting with the word “always”.
I would not recommend this book to no one who has done some communication training, or have spent more than 10 minutes exploring the concept of “consent”. But if you really struggling to get even your basic demands across, this book could be a good starting point for you.
Took me two years to finish (I ended up completely restarting it a few weeks ago) but I'm glad to have read it!
challenging
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
medium-paced
I loved this book and will reference it often when I need boundary reminders.