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informative
I read this book, despite the title and somewhat concerning comments here and there in articles for it, because I'd seen and liked some of Gottman's other work and thought it interesting and insightful. I shouldn't have. The articles about the book which saw it as having a slightly sexist overtone if anything underplayed that tone in the book; it might be the most blatantly sexist book I've ever read. It's chock full of generalizations and stereotypes about how men and women work and how fundamentally different they are, and the interspersing of scientific study anecdotes starts to feel like a thin veneer over a very archaic view of relationships and the world. The perspectives on men alone were downright insulting, assuming us to all be effectively socially ignorant cavemen. On top of that, the vast majority of the "advice" within it is a mixture of very basic elementary relationship advice intermixed with the kind of comments that would fit better in those magazines in the grocery store checkout aisle than a book that purports to be a serious work. There are a handful of genuinely interesting and thoughtful comments or suggestions intermixed with these as well, but they're rare enough and small enough to not be worth the rest.
Maybe for men who fit that caveman stereotype this would be a useful book, and maybe for the world of the 1960s it would be considered forward thinking, but in this day and age it's just bad. If you're looking for a book on relationships and you're a reasonably mature thoughtful adult then find another book; there are far better ones out there.
Maybe for men who fit that caveman stereotype this would be a useful book, and maybe for the world of the 1960s it would be considered forward thinking, but in this day and age it's just bad. If you're looking for a book on relationships and you're a reasonably mature thoughtful adult then find another book; there are far better ones out there.
emotional
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
adventurous
funny
informative
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
funny
informative
reflective
fast-paced
informative
lighthearted
medium-paced
4.5 rounding up. The Gottmans know their shiz. It’s well researched, I was surprised by some of the statistics, and generally the information resonated with my experience. While at times I thought it was a bit cheesy and perhaps occasionally overly simplistic, I honestly think any heterosexual man who is genuinely interested in improving their relationships would benefit from the book. At the very least it would open up some good conversations with their partners.
informative
fast-paced
Very accurate! As a Christian who believes in saving sex for marriage, I would say a few chapters are out of order, but the information is still accurate either way.
Love the approach taken to understanding women and what we want.
Love the approach taken to understanding women and what we want.
Succinct and entertaining book. Squarely aimed at the average dude to give clear and direct advice.
Starts at the beginning - Understanding and Dating, moves to the middle - Romancing and Sex, and finishes at the end - Living With and Loving For A Lifetime. The checklist at the end of each chapter is an invaluable quick review.
This is one of the rare books I've purchased and I plan to frequently review.
Starts at the beginning - Understanding and Dating, moves to the middle - Romancing and Sex, and finishes at the end - Living With and Loving For A Lifetime. The checklist at the end of each chapter is an invaluable quick review.
This is one of the rare books I've purchased and I plan to frequently review.