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3.54 AVERAGE
3.54 AVERAGE
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I related very well to the experiences that Lulu and Sophia had. I really enjoyed reading it from a parent's point of view. Similar to Lulu and Sophia I had a love-hate relationship with my parents and still do since I am still living under their roof. The Chinese have a poor way of expressing themselves and do it in the harshest way possible. We have a saying that goes like this: To scold is to care and to hit is to love. So basically the mentality of Chinese mothers is that if a parent does not discipline a child, she does not love them. I think this was the overall idea that Amy Chua was trying to portray while at the same time showing off her parenting skills.
What I still don't get about Chinese parenting is the desire for their kids to be submissive. We as children are always expected to listen and obey what our parents commands us to do. For example: the scene where Lulu refuses to eat the Caviar in Moscow and Amy Chua keeps ordering her to try it. My parents were like that too, it is a Chinese thing to have control and power over your kids because their children owe their lives to them. Amy did not explain this well enough and I blame it on the length of the novel. It would have been great to know. :)
What I liked:
I loved how transparent and honest Amy Chua was writing this novel. She is not afraid to be judged by what she did and she admits it herself when she has gone overboard. This I believe is the Western influence on her. The Chinese are prideful and private, nobody believes in exposing family dynamics to strangers. Thus, I honestly feel that this is a really good book for an insight into an Asian's life. The first half was alright (a little too much showing off) but the second half was so much more emotional and I felt more connected to Amy. This book was interesting because it was pretty extreme and it really shows you the on-goings of a family of overachievers. They have always baffled me.
What I didn't really like:
There were a lot of facts and technicalities thrown around. Since I am not musically-inclined in any way I felt like I was missing out on something whenever I skimmed through the paragraphs about the technicalities of playing the violin and piano. Amy Chua also tosses a massive amount of information into the mix and a lot of it is pretty pointless but I guess its her auto-biography and she can do anything she wants. There was so much focus on Lulu, sometimes I find myself wishing to know what Sophia was doing in the meantime.
Recommended for anyone who is curious about the life of an Asian and enjoys family drama.
I related very well to the experiences that Lulu and Sophia had. I really enjoyed reading it from a parent's point of view. Similar to Lulu and Sophia I had a love-hate relationship with my parents and still do since I am still living under their roof. The Chinese have a poor way of expressing themselves and do it in the harshest way possible. We have a saying that goes like this: To scold is to care and to hit is to love. So basically the mentality of Chinese mothers is that if a parent does not discipline a child, she does not love them. I think this was the overall idea that Amy Chua was trying to portray while at the same time showing off her parenting skills.
What I still don't get about Chinese parenting is the desire for their kids to be submissive. We as children are always expected to listen and obey what our parents commands us to do. For example: the scene where Lulu refuses to eat the Caviar in Moscow and Amy Chua keeps ordering her to try it. My parents were like that too, it is a Chinese thing to have control and power over your kids because their children owe their lives to them. Amy did not explain this well enough and I blame it on the length of the novel. It would have been great to know. :)
What I liked:
I loved how transparent and honest Amy Chua was writing this novel. She is not afraid to be judged by what she did and she admits it herself when she has gone overboard. This I believe is the Western influence on her. The Chinese are prideful and private, nobody believes in exposing family dynamics to strangers. Thus, I honestly feel that this is a really good book for an insight into an Asian's life. The first half was alright (a little too much showing off) but the second half was so much more emotional and I felt more connected to Amy. This book was interesting because it was pretty extreme and it really shows you the on-goings of a family of overachievers. They have always baffled me.
What I didn't really like:
There were a lot of facts and technicalities thrown around. Since I am not musically-inclined in any way I felt like I was missing out on something whenever I skimmed through the paragraphs about the technicalities of playing the violin and piano. Amy Chua also tosses a massive amount of information into the mix and a lot of it is pretty pointless but I guess its her auto-biography and she can do anything she wants. There was so much focus on Lulu, sometimes I find myself wishing to know what Sophia was doing in the meantime.
Recommended for anyone who is curious about the life of an Asian and enjoys family drama.
Often funny, self-deprecating memoir. Offered a slice of culture that is interesting to me as an international student with Chinese colleagues also studying education.
Wow. Rediculously fascinating. Terrifying. Enjoyable read, maybe I need to make my boys practice a little harder. At something.
This book was fascinating. I got a decent idea of how "Chinese mothering" works and saw some similarities to (very) strict Western parents. Appreciated Chua's self-deprecating tone; this is a tricky subject matter and her willingness to make fun of herself kept the book from being too painful (at times, it was highly amusing). I'm interesting to read more about Chua, especially the supposed backlash she received upon publication of this work. Lots of interesting "starter" material for examining the differences between Eastern and Western cultures.
Not many people seem to get that the book has a lot of hyperbole. A lot of what the author writes about are not meant to be taken as advice or advocating one system of parenting or the other. In fact I'd go as much as to say this is not a book on parenting advice. This is not a book about life growing up as an immigrant in America. This is not a book about family values. This is not a book that gives parenting advice. This is simply a book on how she brought up her kids and where she did right and where she did wrong. She's honest about it too. She did take some extreme measures when raising her kids and she admits it too. People have to read her daughters' response to the criticisms to really understand this.
A lot of criticism seems to be from western readers who seem to take the book quite literally or as parenting advice. I have the same question to them - what is wrong in expecting your kids to excel at what they do? Western concepts of 'having fun' are overrated. What the kids need is to be prepared to face the hard slog that life usually is and not have incorrect and sometime dangerous ideas about how easy and fun things will be in life if they simply follow their passion. I do agree (so does the author) that a one-size-fits-all strategy doesn't suit all parents and kids. Each kid's individual needs and personalities need to be taken into account. But we shouldn't be satisfied to be mediocre. If we are, then that, in my opinion, is what being selfish parents is all about.
A lot of criticism seems to be from western readers who seem to take the book quite literally or as parenting advice. I have the same question to them - what is wrong in expecting your kids to excel at what they do? Western concepts of 'having fun' are overrated. What the kids need is to be prepared to face the hard slog that life usually is and not have incorrect and sometime dangerous ideas about how easy and fun things will be in life if they simply follow their passion. I do agree (so does the author) that a one-size-fits-all strategy doesn't suit all parents and kids. Each kid's individual needs and personalities need to be taken into account. But we shouldn't be satisfied to be mediocre. If we are, then that, in my opinion, is what being selfish parents is all about.
When it comes to cultural differences, as G.K. Chesterton notes in his essay on “The French and the English,” every cultural vice is partly a virtue, and every cultural virtue is partly a vice. The Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother mucks about in this uncomfortable truth. It explores, sometimes in sweeping stereotypes, sometimes in subtler ways, the differences between Asian and American culture, as seen through the lens of parenting.
Full review here.
Full review here.
It's hard to rate this one without rating her as a mother! She makes no apologies for the way she raised her children, and her writing/storytelling is quick. But I just kept finding myself thinking "WOW! This is a lot to put on a kid!" I guess if you are focusing on the end result so I much I feel you are missing a lot of the journey.
challenging
medium-paced
An awe-inspiring, often hilarious, and unerringly honest story of one mother's exercise in extreme parenting, revealing the rewards-and the costs-of raising her children the Chinese way.
All decent parents want to do what's best for their children. What Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother reveals is that the Chinese just have a totally different idea of how to do that. Western parents try to respect their children's individuality, encouraging them to pursue their true passions and providing a nurturing environment. The Chinese believe that the best way to protect your children is by preparing them for the future and arming them with skills, strong work habits, and inner confidence. Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother chronicles Chua's iron-willed decision to raise her daughters, Sophia and Lulu, her way-the Chinese way-and the remarkable results her choice inspires.
Here are some things Amy Chua would never allow her daughters to do:
have a playdate
be in a school play
complain about not being in a school play
not be the #1 student in every subject except gym and drama
play any instrument other than the piano or violin
not play the piano or violin
The truth is Lulu and Sophia would never have had time for a playdate. They were too busy practicing their instruments (two to three hours a day and double sessions on the weekend) and perfecting their Mandarin.
Of course no one is perfect, including Chua herself. Witness this scene:
"According to Sophia, here are three things I actually said to her at the piano as I supervised her practicing:
1. Oh my God, you're just getting worse and worse.
2. I'm going to count to three, then I want musicality.
3. If the next time's not PERFECT, I'm going to take all your stuffed animals and burn them!"
But Chua demands as much of herself as she does of her daughters. And in her sacrifices-the exacting attention spent studying her daughters' performances, the office hours lost shuttling the girls to lessons-the depth of her love for her children becomes clear. Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother is an eye-opening exploration of the differences in Eastern and Western parenting- and the lessons parents and children everywhere teach one another.
This book was a super fast read, like two sittings, for me. It's not that its suspenseful or anything, but just really interesting. I had no idea that parenting styles were so different in different parts of the world. And although to my western way of thinking, some of her techniques seem pretty harsh, I tried to keep in mind that her end goal and my end goal are the same thing in the long run. I tried not to judge, but instead put myself in Amy's mind set, and I'll admit, it was hard.
But what I really loved about this book was the end, where keeping her daughter close to the family was more important than any other belief in parenting, even though it meant giving up a lot on Amy's part. I like that one parenting style worked for one daughter. And I like that Lulu still benefited from aspects of her Chinese upbringing (like her work ethic in playing tennis), even though she needed to do it her own way. I think it would be interesting to see how Sophia and Lulu choose to raise their kids.
This book would make an awesome book club discussion book. I loved it, and recommend it to everyone.
All decent parents want to do what's best for their children. What Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother reveals is that the Chinese just have a totally different idea of how to do that. Western parents try to respect their children's individuality, encouraging them to pursue their true passions and providing a nurturing environment. The Chinese believe that the best way to protect your children is by preparing them for the future and arming them with skills, strong work habits, and inner confidence. Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother chronicles Chua's iron-willed decision to raise her daughters, Sophia and Lulu, her way-the Chinese way-and the remarkable results her choice inspires.
Here are some things Amy Chua would never allow her daughters to do:
have a playdate
be in a school play
complain about not being in a school play
not be the #1 student in every subject except gym and drama
play any instrument other than the piano or violin
not play the piano or violin
The truth is Lulu and Sophia would never have had time for a playdate. They were too busy practicing their instruments (two to three hours a day and double sessions on the weekend) and perfecting their Mandarin.
Of course no one is perfect, including Chua herself. Witness this scene:
"According to Sophia, here are three things I actually said to her at the piano as I supervised her practicing:
1. Oh my God, you're just getting worse and worse.
2. I'm going to count to three, then I want musicality.
3. If the next time's not PERFECT, I'm going to take all your stuffed animals and burn them!"
But Chua demands as much of herself as she does of her daughters. And in her sacrifices-the exacting attention spent studying her daughters' performances, the office hours lost shuttling the girls to lessons-the depth of her love for her children becomes clear. Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother is an eye-opening exploration of the differences in Eastern and Western parenting- and the lessons parents and children everywhere teach one another.
This book was a super fast read, like two sittings, for me. It's not that its suspenseful or anything, but just really interesting. I had no idea that parenting styles were so different in different parts of the world. And although to my western way of thinking, some of her techniques seem pretty harsh, I tried to keep in mind that her end goal and my end goal are the same thing in the long run. I tried not to judge, but instead put myself in Amy's mind set, and I'll admit, it was hard.
But what I really loved about this book was the end, where keeping her daughter close to the family was more important than any other belief in parenting, even though it meant giving up a lot on Amy's part. I like that one parenting style worked for one daughter. And I like that Lulu still benefited from aspects of her Chinese upbringing (like her work ethic in playing tennis), even though she needed to do it her own way. I think it would be interesting to see how Sophia and Lulu choose to raise their kids.
This book would make an awesome book club discussion book. I loved it, and recommend it to everyone.
This was surprisingly fast to read, I have a hard time with non-fiction. As one of my book club members stated, it is like having a conversation with a friend on the phone, so it goes by pretty quickly. I thought that it was interesting to see the difference and her willingness to stick to what she wanted her daughters to achieve. There are days when I think I'm doing it all wrong but others when I realize that my kids are so far turning out to be ok. I do wish they were playing and insturment though, we have talked about it but have not made any steps foward. Pretty sure I don't think I could be a demanding of my kids in that regaurd but hey who knows. I know that if my parents pushed my brother harder he would have been amazing. Very intersting look into a different parenting style and I think there are items that can be taken away from how she raised her daughters and mixed with what we do as parents as well.