Take a photo of a barcode or cover
3.54 AVERAGE
3.54 AVERAGE
Thought provoking. Amy Chua has some valid points about Western parenting in this book, although I think her writing style is deliberately sensationalist (how else are books going to get sold?) She has a sharp writing style and engages the reader.
emotional
reflective
tense
fast-paced
I read this book because it got so much criticism and I was curious as to what made the Western critics upset. I recommend this book to anyone who's interested in gaining more insight into the Eastern style of parenting. The writing style makes the book very quick and easy to read.
Growing up Asian in a predominantly white and black area, I did notice differences in my upbringing versus others around me. The "Chinese" style of parenting illustrated in this book reminded me of my own upbringing. Although I'm not Chinese, due to my parents adopting some of the Western culture, I experienced more of a hybrid style (half Eastern and half Western) of parenting. I can't say that I completely agree with the Eastern style of parenting. The constant judgment on my being, the expectations of perfection, comparing how inferior I was to other people around me, and making me feel guilty for my own existence really did a number on my self-esteem that took me years to overcome. But, I also can't say that I completely Disagree with the Eastern style of parenting either. Because I felt like nothing I did was ever good enough, I always pushed and strived for perfection. It wasn't enough to just complete the goal - I had to CRUSH IT. From the feelings of inadequacy, I turned that into drive, energy, and ambition to be the person that I'm proud to be. However, I also recognize that, that says more about me and how I chose to act on those feelings.
The Eastern style of parenting can be effective for some people, if perfection, high achievement, and ambition is the goal. But as I've gained more experience in life, I feel that there's more to life than just focusing on the typical achievements. It's more important to be a good, kind, compassionate, moral, and ethical human being.
Growing up Asian in a predominantly white and black area, I did notice differences in my upbringing versus others around me. The "Chinese" style of parenting illustrated in this book reminded me of my own upbringing. Although I'm not Chinese, due to my parents adopting some of the Western culture, I experienced more of a hybrid style (half Eastern and half Western) of parenting. I can't say that I completely agree with the Eastern style of parenting. The constant judgment on my being, the expectations of perfection, comparing how inferior I was to other people around me, and making me feel guilty for my own existence really did a number on my self-esteem that took me years to overcome. But, I also can't say that I completely Disagree with the Eastern style of parenting either. Because I felt like nothing I did was ever good enough, I always pushed and strived for perfection. It wasn't enough to just complete the goal - I had to CRUSH IT. From the feelings of inadequacy, I turned that into drive, energy, and ambition to be the person that I'm proud to be. However, I also recognize that, that says more about me and how I chose to act on those feelings.
The Eastern style of parenting can be effective for some people, if perfection, high achievement, and ambition is the goal. But as I've gained more experience in life, I feel that there's more to life than just focusing on the typical achievements. It's more important to be a good, kind, compassionate, moral, and ethical human being.
I love it! I found her insightful and very honest. I've made some changes in my own home inspired by her. We could all stand with a little more tiger in our mothering.
I read this on a whim because my friend had it from the library, was done with it, and convinced me it was 100% worth reading. Well, she was right. I had read a couple articles about Chua and excerpts from the book when it was released with so much hype, so I suppose I assumed I knew what this book had to say. Turns out, it is more nuanced than the media let on (obviously. nuance does NOT sell news) and I was pleasantly surprised. To me it was a cautionary, educational, thought provoking memoir of being a crazy strict, demanding, parent. I could never be a "Chinese mother" but at the same time, I was inspired by Chua's high expectations of her children. The friend who loaned me this book said it made her want to strive to be better, do better with her own kids, and I have to say it had the same effect on me. Not by following Chua's methods (this is not a parenting advice book!), but by having high expectations and being tough enough to prepare my kids for a world that isn't just about having fun.
I know that this book has raised a lot of controversy. If people would take the time to read the cover of the book, I think they would be able to understand it for what it is. The cover reads, "This is a story about a mother, two daughters, and two dogs. This was supposed to be a story about how Chinese parents are better at raising their kids than Western ones. But instead, it's about a bitter clash of cultures, a fleeting taste of glory, and how I was humbled by a thirteen year old." This isn't the story of how Chinese parents are better, which is what the media would have you believe. This is simply an honest account of how a mother, who loves her children, does her best to raise her children. She makes mistakes, and admits to them, and she has successes. Having no children of my own, I cannot say for sure that she experiences what any mothers, of any culture, experience. But I was a thirteen year old girl, and I know all too well that side of the story! I would highly recommend this book. I would just say, have an open mind when you read it. Believe her when she states at the beginning that she is not saying that all Western parents are the same, or that all Chinese parents are the same. If you endure through to the end, with an open mind, I think you will be happy with the ending.
The book essentializes race as the salient factor to define a particularly vicious form of authoritarian parenting. However, the book is really more about a culture of parenting known in the research literature as "music moms" than it is truly about Chinese parenting. Of course, it's a mass-market memoir and not a scholarly treatise, so I suppose readers are meant to forgive the obnoxious degree of stereotyping of Western and Chinese parenting, but since it's written by a well-published scholar who should know better than to deploy Ann Coulter-style rhetoric (of course, Ann Coulter should know better, too, but that's another story), Chua shouldn't be given a free pass to complain about "overprivileged Western children" in one chapter then spend a nearly page-long paragraph in another rattling off all of the countries she took her children to visit before they were 12. It's a very small percentage of parents - Western or non-Western - that can invest as much time, money and emotion into molding their children into prodigious classical musicians ... or that would frankly want to do so in the first place. Progressive educators and parents, know thy enemy and read this book.
I laughed so hard and had to stop at point to think through events she retells because at times Amy Chua is exactly my mother, except she's even more intense, and had the social and financial capital to take her intensity to greater heights than my mum ever could (thank goodness). But the matter of factness explanations of the apparent emotional brutality of being browbeat to greatness, the way mothers and daughters relate in ways that turn Western understanding on its head...I get it. I lived it. And I don't hate my mother either, and if I had my time again I think I would let it happen the same way except this time I would have more understanding of WHY my mum did things the way she did. But I must admit even some of her methods here had me screeching in fear and the outcomes when things worked were so intimidating so yeah...her children are amazing. The writing is not brilliant, but it's very readable, and I raced through it in a day.
I have been fascinated with this woman ever since I read her Wall Street Journal article that was published before the release of her book. She created a firestorm. Indignant mothers everywhere criticized her parenting style and denounced her tactics as inherently cruel. I was intrigued. I thought she raised valid points and was accurate in many of her descriptions of us "westerners". The book did not disappoint. It provided even more context to support the excerpts in the WSJ and served to humanize a person seen by most as villianous. One comment by the author that will stick with me is that Chinese parents assume strength whereas Westerners assume fragility. Shielding our kids from difficult experiences, higher expectations or criticism of their work doesn't benefit them and it certainly doesn't prepare them for the challenges they will face in life. I don't agree with her approach in every respect, but I vow to no longer herald every scribble as a work of art and I will definitely be more constructively critical of their work. Because my kids are tough. They can handle the criticism. As long as it doesn't berate or shame them.
Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother was engrossing and interesting to read. It gave me some things to think about for when I have kids. I don't agree with everything Amy said, but I see her point on some issues. I think that she does love her kids but that her form of love isn't really understood or upheld in our society. Some things I found cruel, and I'm definitely glad she wasn't my mother, but I think she realizes her shortcomings (at one point, she says she wouldn't wish herself on anybody).
Interesting. I mean, one woman's perspective of child-rearing. She is also less villainous than she's been made out to be by various media sources.