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2.63k reviews for:
Bátran a vadonban: Hogyan tapasztaljuk meg a valódi összetartozást és álljunk ki önmagunkért
Brené Brown
4.06 AVERAGE
2.63k reviews for:
Bátran a vadonban: Hogyan tapasztaljuk meg a valódi összetartozást és álljunk ki önmagunkért
Brené Brown
4.06 AVERAGE
Braving the Wilderness is an argument and a rubric for finding belonging through self-sufficiency. Brené Brown describes, in sometimes annoyingly poetic language, how that pursuit can help one become a strong, kind person, who stands up for their beliefs without stooping to petty, malicious behavior. This book is definitely relevant for our times, but it rings a little too "nice" for the moment in which I read it (mid-2020 as police violence explodes, the government struggles to respond appropriately, and people are backing off from "BLM" as quickly as they adopted it).
My family has loved Brené Brown for a long time, so I probably approached this book with higher expectations than were fair, but, despite liking some of Brown's arguments, it mostly just wasn't for me. As mentioned above, I don't love Brown's use of language. She often chooses a dramatic flourish over clarity of language, which I'm sure leads to some very instagrammable quotes, but makes reading frustrating.
I would be interested to see how many times Brown exclaims about the volume and breadth of her research versus the number of times she actually cites something from her catalog of "two-hundred-thousand-plus pieces of data". A lot of the book felt like she was working through imposter syndrome. Multiple times she quoted from her own previous books (once making the weird claim that a definition she applied to a word less than a decade ago has held up), and she gives brief summaries of every book that she's written immediately after encouraging people to check out her website for additional resources - in an actual chapter of her book.
It's weird.
Aside from my personal annoyances with her form over function writing style, her weird plugs of her own work, and the fact that this book could have easily been half as long without losing much in the way of content, I enjoyed the suggestions and will probably be posting a quote of hers on my instagram at some point in the near future.
Anywho, here's some nice quotes:
“Do not think you can be brave with your life and your work and never disappoint anyone. It doesn’t work that way.” -Oprah (3%)
"You are only free when you realize you belong no place—you belong every place—no place at all. The price is high. The reward is great." -Maya Angelou (4%)
[T]he need to fit in and the ache of not belonging was one of the most painful threads in my own life. (4%)
I’m doing that thing I do when I’m afraid. I’m floating above my life, watching it and studying it, rather than living it. (11%)
I'm here to talk from my heart to their hearts. (14%)
Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance. (17%)
1. People Are Hard to Hate Close Up. Move In.
2. Speak Truth to Bullshit. Be Civil.
3. Hold Hands. With Strangers.
4. Strong Back. Soft Front. Wild Heart.
(19%)
B —Did I respect my own boundaries? Was I clear about what’s okay and what’s not okay?
R —Was I reliable? Did I do what I said I was going to do?
A —Did I hold myself accountable?
V —Did I respect the vault and share appropriately?
I —Did I act from my integrity?
N —Did I ask for what I needed? Was I nonjudgmental about needing help?
G —Was I generous toward myself?
(22%)
As fast as we’re sorting ourselves, the people around us are hustling to sort us too, so they know what to do and say, and so they can decide why they should trust us or why they shouldn’t...The paradox is that we all love the ready-made filing system, so handy when we want to quickly characterize people, but we resent it when we’re the ones getting filed away. (26%)
[W]e don’t derive strength from our rugged individualism, but rather from our collective ability to plan, communicate, and work together. (29%)
[I]f we can find a way to feel hurt rather than spread hurt, we can change. (32%)
Most of us were not taught how to recognize pain, name it, and be with it. Our families and culture believed that the vulnerability that it takes to acknowledge pain was weakness, so we were taught anger, rage, and denial instead. (35%)
[W]hen we deny our emotion, it owns us. (35%)
Once we see people on “the other side” of a conflict as morally inferior and even dangerous, the conflict starts being framed as good versus evil. (38%)
People often silence themselves, or “agree to disagree” without fully exploring the actual nature of the disagreement, for the sake of protecting a relationship and maintaining connection. But when we avoid certain conversations, and never fully learn how the other person feels about all of the issues, we sometimes end up making assumptions that not only perpetuate but deepen misunderstandings, and that can generate resentment. (42%)
We have to listen to understand in the same way we want to be understood. (44%)
We don’t even bother being curious anymore because somewhere, someone on “our side” has a position. In a fitting-in culture—at home, at work, or in our larger community—curiosity is seen as weakness and asking questions equates to antagonism rather than being valued as learning. (48%)
Even tools of civility can become weaponized if the intention is there. (59%)
My favorite Peanuts cartoon is Linus crying “I love mankind…it’s people I can’t stand!” (63%)
[T]he more we’re willing to seek out moments of collective joy and show up for experiences of collective pain—for real, in person, not online—the more difficult it becomes to deny our human connection, even with people we may disagree with. (73%)
"There is the in-breath and there is the out-breath, and it’s easy to believe that we must exhale all the time, without ever inhaling. But the inhale is absolutely essential if you want to continue to exhale.” (79%)
My family has loved Brené Brown for a long time, so I probably approached this book with higher expectations than were fair, but, despite liking some of Brown's arguments, it mostly just wasn't for me. As mentioned above, I don't love Brown's use of language. She often chooses a dramatic flourish over clarity of language, which I'm sure leads to some very instagrammable quotes, but makes reading frustrating.
I would be interested to see how many times Brown exclaims about the volume and breadth of her research versus the number of times she actually cites something from her catalog of "two-hundred-thousand-plus pieces of data". A lot of the book felt like she was working through imposter syndrome. Multiple times she quoted from her own previous books (once making the weird claim that a definition she applied to a word less than a decade ago has held up), and she gives brief summaries of every book that she's written immediately after encouraging people to check out her website for additional resources - in an actual chapter of her book.
It's weird.
Aside from my personal annoyances with her form over function writing style, her weird plugs of her own work, and the fact that this book could have easily been half as long without losing much in the way of content, I enjoyed the suggestions and will probably be posting a quote of hers on my instagram at some point in the near future.
Anywho, here's some nice quotes:
“Do not think you can be brave with your life and your work and never disappoint anyone. It doesn’t work that way.” -Oprah (3%)
"You are only free when you realize you belong no place—you belong every place—no place at all. The price is high. The reward is great." -Maya Angelou (4%)
[T]he need to fit in and the ache of not belonging was one of the most painful threads in my own life. (4%)
I’m doing that thing I do when I’m afraid. I’m floating above my life, watching it and studying it, rather than living it. (11%)
I'm here to talk from my heart to their hearts. (14%)
Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance. (17%)
1. People Are Hard to Hate Close Up. Move In.
2. Speak Truth to Bullshit. Be Civil.
3. Hold Hands. With Strangers.
4. Strong Back. Soft Front. Wild Heart.
(19%)
B —Did I respect my own boundaries? Was I clear about what’s okay and what’s not okay?
R —Was I reliable? Did I do what I said I was going to do?
A —Did I hold myself accountable?
V —Did I respect the vault and share appropriately?
I —Did I act from my integrity?
N —Did I ask for what I needed? Was I nonjudgmental about needing help?
G —Was I generous toward myself?
(22%)
As fast as we’re sorting ourselves, the people around us are hustling to sort us too, so they know what to do and say, and so they can decide why they should trust us or why they shouldn’t...The paradox is that we all love the ready-made filing system, so handy when we want to quickly characterize people, but we resent it when we’re the ones getting filed away. (26%)
[W]e don’t derive strength from our rugged individualism, but rather from our collective ability to plan, communicate, and work together. (29%)
[I]f we can find a way to feel hurt rather than spread hurt, we can change. (32%)
Most of us were not taught how to recognize pain, name it, and be with it. Our families and culture believed that the vulnerability that it takes to acknowledge pain was weakness, so we were taught anger, rage, and denial instead. (35%)
[W]hen we deny our emotion, it owns us. (35%)
Once we see people on “the other side” of a conflict as morally inferior and even dangerous, the conflict starts being framed as good versus evil. (38%)
People often silence themselves, or “agree to disagree” without fully exploring the actual nature of the disagreement, for the sake of protecting a relationship and maintaining connection. But when we avoid certain conversations, and never fully learn how the other person feels about all of the issues, we sometimes end up making assumptions that not only perpetuate but deepen misunderstandings, and that can generate resentment. (42%)
We have to listen to understand in the same way we want to be understood. (44%)
We don’t even bother being curious anymore because somewhere, someone on “our side” has a position. In a fitting-in culture—at home, at work, or in our larger community—curiosity is seen as weakness and asking questions equates to antagonism rather than being valued as learning. (48%)
Even tools of civility can become weaponized if the intention is there. (59%)
My favorite Peanuts cartoon is Linus crying “I love mankind…it’s people I can’t stand!” (63%)
[T]he more we’re willing to seek out moments of collective joy and show up for experiences of collective pain—for real, in person, not online—the more difficult it becomes to deny our human connection, even with people we may disagree with. (73%)
"There is the in-breath and there is the out-breath, and it’s easy to believe that we must exhale all the time, without ever inhaling. But the inhale is absolutely essential if you want to continue to exhale.” (79%)
Read in one sitting. Everyone should read this book...twice.
informative
fast-paced
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
informative
inspiring
reflective
slow-paced
This is the only book I have read (listened to) twice. Narrated by Brené herself, it's just a great book in many dimensions. It is succinct but not brief, detailed but not boring, and each aspect of the journey into our wilderness is outlined with real, relatable examples. It is a very human book about our own struggle to be human and genuine.
I would also recommend this for any entrepreneur as its messages apply equally to the business journey as they do a personal one.
I would also recommend this for any entrepreneur as its messages apply equally to the business journey as they do a personal one.
informative
medium-paced
This was okay. It was a little boring and I didn’t like all her stories all that much. But I liked a lot of her quotes in this. I love her and her insights but I just didn’t love this book.
Not sure this book aged well since it’s release. I can identify a lot of Brown’s line of thinking with western Christianity, and while there are parts of that I still maintain in my life, there are others I do not. Do I think all humans have value? Yes, without question. Do I need to give my energy and time arguing with people who are radicalized and have no interest in having a conversation that may change their perspective? Nah. The “both sides deserve to be heard” thing gets a lot less zen when neo nazis emerged shortly after a certain president took office. Giving weight and validity to points of view that are quite literally dangerous? I’m good.
Lots of good snippets here and there, I especially resonate with the quote she had towards the end “if you search in someone’s face for disapproval or dislike, you will find it.” The centering/grounding of staying close to your true belonging messages were great, albeit not linear so it felt like flipping through inspirational quote books, but I thought about it and it helped me on some hard days this week, so it was worth it. Quick read.
Lots of good snippets here and there, I especially resonate with the quote she had towards the end “if you search in someone’s face for disapproval or dislike, you will find it.” The centering/grounding of staying close to your true belonging messages were great, albeit not linear so it felt like flipping through inspirational quote books, but I thought about it and it helped me on some hard days this week, so it was worth it. Quick read.
