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4.24 AVERAGE
4.24 AVERAGE
I've read this several times. It helps me examine my motives in making decisions and understand what I'm doing when I'm being offended. I had him for a class or two and really liked him.
I found this book to be full of personal epiphanies. I especially liked what it had to say about doing the right thing. I've done a lot of pondering on what it means to be a good person over the last couple years. This book acted as a bridge for me between the different Eastern and Western philosophies I've read. I was also impacted by the book's message on being authentic and outwardly focused. It's left me with many things to think about.
Really incredible ideas. I read this as a manuscript during my undergraduate schooling; happy to now read the book! I couldn't let my mind wander at all, or get distracted - I needed to pay close attention to every sentence. By doing so however, there is much to learn about how we can spend our lives with more peace and happiness because of the the way we can (and should) think about everyone around us. This was worth my time!
This is THE self-help book. All-in-one, shampoo plus conditioner. Seriously life-changing, but it doesn't work if we don't read the directions and use daily.
Always provides a profound reminder of how to most respectfully navigate our relationships with one another, and maintain control of our perceptions. This is one of the few books I have read more than 2x. It has become a sort of personal scripture to me, a canon for relationships.
Just re-read this and am still conflicted.
On the one hand, this is an essential, powerful guide to helping one open their eyes to see and root out the betrayals and lies we inflict on ourselves that create barriers to authentic and compassionate interactions. It's brutal and demanding and we all need it.
Well, almost all of us.
The fatal flaw of Warner's approach is a lack of awareness of the added complexities of abusive or codependent relationships. His "everything is my fault and my responsibility to turn around" approach can go so, so wrong, and his descriptions of victims of rape and infidelity are beyond tone deaf.
On the one hand, this is an essential, powerful guide to helping one open their eyes to see and root out the betrayals and lies we inflict on ourselves that create barriers to authentic and compassionate interactions. It's brutal and demanding and we all need it.
Well, almost all of us.
The fatal flaw of Warner's approach is a lack of awareness of the added complexities of abusive or codependent relationships. His "everything is my fault and my responsibility to turn around" approach can go so, so wrong, and his descriptions of victims of rape and infidelity are beyond tone deaf.
Terry Warner's The Bonds That Make Us Free is one of the most thought-provoking and behavior changing books I have read in some time. it is impossible to capture even a small part of its value-add in this review, so I strongly recommend reading it. Anyone will benefit, and those who think they need it the least will likely benefit the most if they will read it with an open mind and heart.
Nominally fitting into the "self-help" category of books, it really relates more to self-understanding...that is, understanding of our divinely-inspired best selves, and what it will take to understand the truths that will help us live up to our infinite potential. Warner explores issues around self-deception, and living in "the box," and how to remove ourselves from that self-absorbed and self-deceiving way of being. He discusses how we make victims of ourselves and villains of others, all the while reducing ourselves and others to convenient labels that are tied to well-rutted ways of behaving. He points out how we collude with others, unbeknownst to ourselves or them, in ways that lead us to persist in unhealthy and self-damaging behavior.
Then, with case examples and well thought-out language, he carefully and insightfully explains what we can do about these problems. How to return to truthful thinking, feeling, and seeing. And ultimately, how to change our hearts so that we will eventually come to respond in healthy ways of being without even being conscious of it. Finally, he helps us see how the powerful and often dark influences of the past can be overcome and set aside by the truth, leading us to forgive and thus live free of the shackles that have kept us in spiritual, personal, or psychic bondage.
None of this, of course, comes without a price, but the price is paid in courage, hard work, and a willingness to search for and see truth, rather than the comfort of long held falsehoods. TANSTAAFL...nothing is free, but in this case the price is not in coin, but in self-development and awareness and truth. It is a price well worth paying, a debt long overdue for most of us. I am only beginning that journey, but I can see that the end result will be sweet beyond all expectation. This is a book to which I will return often for reminders, further insights, and encouragement.
Nominally fitting into the "self-help" category of books, it really relates more to self-understanding...that is, understanding of our divinely-inspired best selves, and what it will take to understand the truths that will help us live up to our infinite potential. Warner explores issues around self-deception, and living in "the box," and how to remove ourselves from that self-absorbed and self-deceiving way of being. He discusses how we make victims of ourselves and villains of others, all the while reducing ourselves and others to convenient labels that are tied to well-rutted ways of behaving. He points out how we collude with others, unbeknownst to ourselves or them, in ways that lead us to persist in unhealthy and self-damaging behavior.
Then, with case examples and well thought-out language, he carefully and insightfully explains what we can do about these problems. How to return to truthful thinking, feeling, and seeing. And ultimately, how to change our hearts so that we will eventually come to respond in healthy ways of being without even being conscious of it. Finally, he helps us see how the powerful and often dark influences of the past can be overcome and set aside by the truth, leading us to forgive and thus live free of the shackles that have kept us in spiritual, personal, or psychic bondage.
None of this, of course, comes without a price, but the price is paid in courage, hard work, and a willingness to search for and see truth, rather than the comfort of long held falsehoods. TANSTAAFL...nothing is free, but in this case the price is not in coin, but in self-development and awareness and truth. It is a price well worth paying, a debt long overdue for most of us. I am only beginning that journey, but I can see that the end result will be sweet beyond all expectation. This is a book to which I will return often for reminders, further insights, and encouragement.
Good book. It is a bit repeative in sections, but I think that's because of the subject matter. Great book about curing self-betrayal/ delusions/ seeing-others-as-they are. One of those deep books about forgivenss. The depth of it made it take a lot longer to read than it typically takes me to finish books.