347 reviews for:

Amo Odiarte

Heather Demetrios

4.1 AVERAGE


This is a hard book to rate and review, because while I liked it a lot, at the same time I didn't. If this makes no sense to you, what I mean is this: it's a very, very well-written book, with extremely realistic characters and a story that was completely immersive--I couldn't stop reading it, because I cared, deeply, about what would happen to Grace and was so invested in her; I wanted to be able to tell her she deserved better, that she shouldn't let Gavin or her family or anyone else treat her the way they did. Demetrios knows how to write, and I'll definitely be checking out more of her books in the future because she has a very unique voice.

But conversely, the fact that I was so invested in Grace is also what made me dislike the book--because it was painful, really painful, how much I could relate to her, and it made me confront things about myself that I usually try not to. Thankfully I've never been in an abusive relationship like Gavin and Grace's, but I can very easily see how I COULD have, if things had turned out slightly differently. Because I know really well what it's like to have your self-worth constantly degraded to the point where you start believing everything other people say about you--that you're worthless, stupid, bad, can't do anything right, someone who only deserves broken things. And when you're in that state of mind, and someone comes along who doesn't treat you like you're something inferior or messed up, it's almost empowering; finally, you have someone who understands and loves and accepts you for who are, and it's almost like a drug, the kind of happiness and sense of relief that gives you.

And that person who makes you feel good about yourself has a lot of power over you, whether they realize it or not.

In my case I got lucky, because the people who helped me find my own self-worth were people who legitimately loved and accepted me for who I am, unconditionally, and also helped me to realize that even if other people say I'm broken or a burden, it's not necessarily true and I shouldn't define myself based on what other people tell me. But had I run into the wrong person at the right time--who knows how things might've turned out? And that's scary, really; it's scary to admit something like that could happen to you, it's scary to admit that you were ever in such a dark and vulnerable place. Especially if you're someone like me, who likes to push the bad things to the farthest recesses of my mind because as long as they're there I don't have to deal with them, and I definitely don't have to admit that I'm not always the strongest person. (denial is my survival mechanism!!!)

So yeah, I don't know how to review this book, but I'd recommend it to anyone who is in a strong enough place to read it.

Well written. Sheds light to some relationships that some might not understand.

Unputdownable. I had to keep reading. Heather Demetrios does such a fantastic job of showing why Grace fell in love with Gavin. I would've been in love with him too! And ignoring all the red flags. So many women do this in relationships. I've never been in an abusive one, but I've ignored the signs about why so and so was wrong for me, and how this one or that one didn't care for me or was using me. And showing poor Grace's home life, the relationship between her mother and stepfather. I hate to think of little Sam growing up in that same environment. Maybe the Giant will be better to him since A) he's his own kid and B) he's a boy. Maybe Grace's mom will work up the courage to eventually leave him and revert back to the mom she was in Grace and her older sister Beth's childhood.

Without a doubt Lys and Nat are lifesavers. The perfect friends, I love that they were always there for Grace when things were at their worst. I don't know if I'll ever reread Bad Romance, it deals with such hard things, but the story was told just right, and the writing was perfect.

When I heard about this book, I was interested. I have not come across a book that talks about going through an abusive relationship and coming out of it stronger. I avoided YA book because of the cliche, tropes and high school setting which is so tired.

As the book started, I felt that Grace was annoying and abit of a try hard with all her literature references. I did not really like the start especially with how she was so infatuated with Gavin and romantacized him.

I am going to be talking about spoilers and trigger warning for rape.

However as the book progressed, even though I could see everything played out, the things Gavin would do to control Grace, I could not do anything and it sure frustrated me. The little thing Gavin would do and Grace would brush off even though a small part of her is raising flags. I felt sad because her home life was terrible and that is why she latches on to the one thing that is good.

I could definitely identify with her on many things though she annoyed me. The conflict she felt because Gavin did many good things as well as bad. It was sad to see those around her knowing what was going on and telling her it was not right but she kept trying to justify it.

Many things in this book saddened me but most especially the repeated rape, the feeling she could not say no because Gavin was pressuring her. It is easy to say just say "no" but when you are in that situation, many factors can make that hard.

I applaud her for breaking up with him but still acknowledging that she loved him but was not in love with him anymore. Knowing the difference was important. I felt it was realistic that she rebounded by going back to him and it happened a few times before she finally let go. The reader gets two perspectives as to why victims stay in abusive relationships, for Grace it is because of the good side to Gavin and the support he gives that confuses her. For Grace's mom it is her mental disorder and financial reliance that makes her stay.

The ending was very emotional. But I did not think it was cool that she emotionally cheated on him, I wished she had just figured it out herself. But I think the author did this to show what healthy and normal love looks like as opposed to what she has with Gavin. I liked her relationship with her friends as though they come from different backgrounds and beliefs, they still stuck with her through it all.

I like that this book does not just focus on relationship abuse but familial abuse as well. Highlighting the contrast between Grace's family and Gavin's. Abuse can come from anywhere.

Even though the book was not very good at the start, I would still recommend this for everyone, anyone to read. Not just girls. This is a take on a taboo subject and for once, I was cringing at the parts where I used to find romantic. Yup, nearly all of behavior Gavin exhibits (Overprotective, controlling, declarations of always thinking of Grace, her being his world etc.) has been used in almost all genres eg YA, NA, adult contemporary, fantasy, you name it and termed as romantic, protective and good traits. This has been around for quite awhile where many readers romanticize actions that are actually not very healthy or right.

Examples are Edward Cullen from Twilight, Travis Maddox from Beautiful Disaster, Christian Grey from Fifty Shades. These are probably the most recognisable ones but there are many many more.

That is why I feel that this book is so important to give a different perspective on what is considered healthy in a relationship. We have been fed this image that a boyfriend has to be overprotective to the point of stalkerish and obssesive to be considered good and romantic but that is not right or true. More people need to be aware of this whether it is the younger generation or those who have grown up with this message. Thank you very much to the author for doing something very brave! This as an impactful book.

brb currently crying in the club (metaphorically ofc bc #quarantine)

Three stars is never really a good thing when you see a book review. But this book was very good. The writing was nice, the story was great, the characters were well developed, and the message is nicely delivered (an important one too!). This is just not my type of book.

I knew this would be a difficult book before going in due to the subject matter and personal experience. It's a topic that is very rarely addressed in real-life, let alone in novels, so I found this to be a very important book. One that every teenager needs to read, because domestic violence is not necessarily physical, and more awareness needs to be made regarding what's okay and not okay in a relationship.

We follow Grace and at the start she is full of ambition, reaching for the stars (i.e. New York) to follow her dream to become a famous, successful directer. She loves musicals and Pepsi Freezes (don't know what they are, but after reading this I want to find out if they exist and what they are) and is enjoying life with her friends and drama club. Enter Gavin, who is your typical charismatic, charming, music loving boy. Basically, any teen girls kryptonite, or blue eyed snake.

We see how he worms his way into Graces life. even from the beginning she had no control, it felt like she was under his spell and he was ready to take advantage, which immediately gave me alarm bells. Straight away I saw him as a manipulative narcissist, but Grace was crazy about him, and love is blind from these subtle signs. He wanted Grace and Grace just needed to sit back and watch it happen. The further we go, the more aggressive, controlling, and dangerous Gavin becomes, and it honestly was scary about how far he was going to go.
Spoiler Gavin threatened that he will kill himself if Grace broke up with him, which sends Grace into a spiral of guilt and confusion, but it is presumably what happened with Summer
I started getting really scared for Grace, and it was seriously affecting her mental health
Spoiler as she got to such a low point of desperation, she held a knife and seriously considering cutting her wrists just so she could escape the trap she felt herself in
Even though I never went through anything as serious as Grace did, but there are still similarities that I was able to relate to. Making excuses for their behaviour, blaming yourself when they got angry, having such a low self-esteem you start worrying that you can't leave because 'no-one else can anyone love me', using 'I love him' as an excuse for sticking around and hoping that you can somehow fix everything if you stayed.

I really empathised with Grace. Her family life was terrible, with her mother suffering from OCD and forcing Grace to clean an already clean spot, doing ridiculous chores, and dealing with an equally abusive step-father. It was clever to include this in the novel, as Grace's need for love and acceptance from Gavin can be linked to her poor home life. At the beginning, Gavin seemed like a break from them, an escape and a chance to feel happy again. This frame of mind is possibility how people get trapped into abusive relationships. The bad relationship at home is considered 'normal', and Grace started to realise this further in the novel, she could she herself in her mother, and what could be her life if she doesn't get out soon.

I loved how Grace had such a positive relationship with her two best friends Nat and Lys. I loved their characters and storyarcs. Nat is a sweet, innocent Catholic girl, and Lys is a scene-kid lesbian and they are all such incredible, supportive friends to each other. They help Grace as much as they can, whilst also helping her see the light without being impatient or pushy. They were always there for her which is such a good thing to see. Friends sticking together. It showed how important friends can be in this situation as they can really see how moods change and red flags show
Spoiler when Grace didn't apply to her dream school in New York because Gavin forced her to stay in LA


The story is told in the second person, and Grace is talking to Gavin (i.e. 'you') which I thought was a very good way to tell the story. We see Grace's inner monolgue throughout the entire relationship and how in retrospect she feels she could've left after the first red flags, because hindsight is an amazing thing, right? You feel all the emotions that she goes through and how many times to changes her mind and give Gavin 'one more chance' and your rooting for her to finally do it. It is so incredibly brave to stop with the excuses and stop with the 'compromises' and cut all ties. At the end, we start to see the Grace we see at the beginning. Excited for life, loving her times with her friends. Although the affects of Gavin are still there, haunting. She still worried about whether he's going to follow her, or find her, and that's something that might stick for the rest of her life.
Spoiler You know the game you probably played in school, where you spin an apple with it's cord and count the alphabet, and whichever letter it ends on is the letter of the person who's your soulmate? Well, Grace does this and it always lands on G. Grace initially thought this was Gavin, and then Gideon, but at the end, she realised that the G was for Grace. She is her own soulmate. Which is a powerful message to always love yourself and take care of yourself.


The slight critique I had was that it seemed strange how Summer was no longer present in the novel after a few chapters in, and I really thought her perspective and past would've really helped Grace. I also would've loved to see a bit more of the aftermath, maybe seeing Grace at College and starting her new life? But I understand why the author left it where she did.

Overall, I think this is such as important read for every young person. But there are trigger warning for abuse, suicide, depression, anxiety. So bare this in mind at all times and don't feel as if you need to push through them. It's such a difficult read that not everyone can get through, but still incredibly important.

You can find more of my reviews here at my blog: Take Me Away...

I've been a fan of Demetrios' work ever since her very first novel. I've loved what's she's done ever since, and this one is no different. Although it's so much darker than her normal, it's still amazing!
Grace has an unbelievably hard life. At home, she deals with a giant of a stepfather and a mother who refuses to accept her demons. Then comes Gavin, the boy who she's always adored. When he finally notices her, she can't believe her luck. Until she realizes the idea of him was much better than the reality of him.
I started this book on my cruise and I was NOT expecting to finish it while on my cruise. It was just that good. As soon as I started it, I couldn't put it down. I hate this cliché (because no one should be that nosey and not get help) but it was like watching a train crash and not wanting to look away. It was such a terrible story, but Demetrios wrote it in a way that I couldn't put it down. I wanted to jump into the story and try to help Grace because I couldn't stand watching this happen to her.
Speaking of Grace, I hated that I loved the main characters. It's just the way that Demetrios wrote them. Grace was too sweet and understanding and Gavin was such a perfect POS. Then there was her mom and her stepfather who I really disliked. They did nothing to help her situation. And then there was her best friends, Nat and Lys. They were amazingly sweet and understanding and I'm super glad Grace had them in her corner.
This has climbed to the top of my favorite books by Demetrios. The story was so realistic, but it was so hard to read. There were times when I had to close the book just to write a super long passage in my notebook about the story. It's such an important topic and I'm very glad that someone wrote about it. Few people like to admit that abuse can happen in teen relationships.
And as always, Demetrios' writing style pulled me into the story and wouldn't let me go until I was finished. I loved how she used second person in some places, it made it stand out more because she seemed to be looking back on what happened. It gave me hope for the ending.
This story is so important and needs to be read by everyone. This book solidified my love for Heather Demetrios and I can't wait to see what else she has up her sleeve.

I'm in 2 minds about this book. The subject matter is a really big subject and I think was executed quite well by the end, but I really struggled to get into it and I didn't enjoy Grace's voice. I think I'm the odd one out based on all the glowing 5 star reviews raving about 'beautiful writing' but I think it was so overdone. The first few chapters I basically just cringed the whole way through, because the metaphor and flowery writing felt so overdone to me, and made Grace a really annoying character to read. I think it improved towards the end, or maybe I just got used to it.

I also didn't like the foreshadowing, because I think it made the story have less emotional impact. I knew that Gavin was going to be abusive and toxic and they were going to break up, so I couldn't get invested in their growing relationship at all. I was just waiting for the part where it stopped being eye-rollingly cringey and Grace realised she was in trouble.

What I do think was done well was the progression of Grace and Gavin's relationship from normal and happy to toxic. It didn't happen all of a sudden, it was very gradual. There was a point in the book where Grace said something like "I used to feel safe with you and now I don't" and that I think was quite realistic. I think that gradual progression really highlighted the subtly of emotionally manipulative relationships.

I get what the author was trying to do with the tense changes, and that it was meant to be reflective, but having the book written in first present tense with occasional paragraphs of foreshadowing did not work for me. Ever time the tense shifted like that I was pulled right out of the story, and it was disruptive to the narrative. I think it would have been more effective to have the relationship just progress to that dark point without continually reminding readers that it's going to get dark.

I do think that Grace develops as a charcter through the book, as she essentially goes through all the stages of battered woman syndrome, and finally realises that the abuse is not her fault towards the end. There were times that I just wanted to scream at her to just leave, to stop making excuses for him, but I realise that that's me looking at a manipulative relationship from the outside, and that she was caught up in it so couldn't see it that way. I did like that she left the relationship for herself- I was worried when Gideon was introduced that he'd be the one she went running to, so I'm glad that didn't happen. I think it leaves readers with a much better message that Grace leaves for herself and no one else.

So to summarise, my main issues were tense changes/foreshadowing, and Grace's voice, which I found quite young and superficial and at odds with the seriousness of the subject matter. The things I liked were the relationship progression and the tackling of such a big topic. Overall, I'm not sure I would recommend this book just because the writing was so hard to get into for me- If it hadn't been a bookclub pick I don't known if I'd have made it far enough in to get to the decent part.
emotional reflective sad fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven: Character
Strong character development: Yes
Loveable characters: Yes
Diverse cast of characters: Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus: Complicated

This book was very interesting. And really gave a deep look into an abusive relationship and the way one can lose themselves without realizing it. 

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