Reviews tagging 'Ableism'

What My Bones Know: A Memoir of Healing from Complex Trauma by Stephanie Foo

7 reviews

rubellaface's review against another edition

challenging emotional hopeful informative inspiring reflective sad tense medium-paced

5.0

Quick caveat: I do not have C-PTSD. I am a second-generation Filipino American who grew up to have high-functioning anxiety & depression due to tiger parenting, growing up Asian American, and being forced to become an alpha daughter. 

Reading this book triggered me and had me questioning my reality and how I’ve often laughed-off or disassociated my personal trauma in order to succeed in life (and therefore be perceived as being okay). Her coping mechanisms were/are my coping mechanisms, and funnily enough, I didn’t even realize they were coping mechanisms. So as Stephanie went down the rabbit hole of finding out what her bones know and how to fix it, I was right beside her– transfixed and checking my own bones for fissures and trauma from similar situations in my family life. 

Cause Stephanie Foo does not pull her punches when recounting her childhood. Every abusive situation is described in a way that is almost clinical and ripe for analyzing. Her book is basically an emotional autopsy of her trauma, and the way she uses her journalism background to thoroughly vet every single c-ptsd-related therapy is both thrilling and heartbreaking. As a reader, you want Stephanie to find a therapy that works for her and that can “cure” her, and I just wanted to hug her each time a practice or therapist failed her. 

Needless to say, I was emotionally invested in Stephanie’s book. I cried towards the end as she found stable ground and the tools to fight for her peace of mind. And I cried again at the similarities in how we approached our weddings and wedding guests. Her healing journey echoed and reaffirmed my own, and I will recommend this book to all my AAPI friends who I know have gone through sh*t and are trying their best.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Alcoholism, Drug use, Toxic friendship, Abandonment, Addiction, Bullying, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Grief, Panic attacks/disorders, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Physical abuse, Child abuse, Cursing, Injury/Injury detail, Mental illness, and Violence

Moderate: Ableism, Pandemic/Epidemic, Racism, Sexual assault, Colonisation, Misogyny, Sexism, and Classism

Very triggering. Sometimes in a good way.

alexisgarcia's review against another edition

dark emotional informative sad medium-paced

4.0

wow, this is such a necessary read. while there are some dark personal moments, they are coupled with informative commentary. also, i really recommend the audiobook because their are audio clips from the authors therapy sessions which i thought added a lot. please check content warnings!!!

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Chronic illness, Gaslighting, Grief, Child abuse, Cursing, Emotional abuse, Injury/Injury detail, Self harm, Bullying, Ableism, Alcohol, Abandonment, Mental illness, and Physical abuse

decie's review against another edition

challenging reflective sad

3.0

so.......mixed feelings. there were brief snippets of saneism throughout the book, which I didn't love. for example - the outdated (incorrect and stigmatizing) way the author explained DID was not great. and then later in the book she literally said cptsd is the only diagnosis that is caused by other people/isn't your fault, unlike [list of highly stigmatized conditions that are literally also caused by trauma]. 

I did like a lot of things she did in this book. rly struggling to rate it.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Emotional abuse, Child abuse, Ableism, Mental illness, Physical abuse, and Drug use

Moderate: Racism, Death of parent, and Suicidal thoughts

provo's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional funny hopeful informative reflective medium-paced

5.0

Luckily, Stephanie Foo did not just write a memoir - as a journalist, she researches very well and takes the reader on a journey from her childhood to the first real results of her recovery. 
By doing so, she doesn’t try to paint a picture of a miracle healing, but shows, how hard it is to find individual solutions in a dysfunctional medical system where not enough professionals are familiar with this young diagnosis. She elaborates how racism and sexism play a part in c-ptsd and does not shy away from talking about genetics and intergenerational trauma.

At some points in the early chapters the abuse is written quite graphic, so be aware of that, otherwise I’d say it is the perfect book for someone recently diagnosed with c-ptsd or people who are close to someone with this diagnosis. It also has a lot of quotes for follow-up-literature.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Suicidal thoughts, Emotional abuse, Medical trauma, Mental illness, Abandonment, Child abuse, and Chronic illness

Moderate: Self harm, Eating disorder, Misogyny, Ableism, Panic attacks/disorders, Classism, Colonisation, Domestic abuse, and Racism

wetdirtreads's review against another edition

challenging informative reflective medium-paced

3.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Child abuse, Mental illness, Abandonment, Suicide attempt, Racism, Medical trauma, and Physical abuse

Moderate: Addiction, Body shaming, Hate crime, and War

careinthelibrary's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional sad tense medium-paced

4.0

This was really good. It struck me how candid Stephanie was being about her childhood traumas, how those experiences affected her and as a result rippled down to all of Foo's relationships and aspirations.
The descriptions of the childhood abuse was palpable, sickening, and incredibly sad. Major content warnings for these scenes, please take care while reading.

The relationships with her parents in her adulthood was also fascinating. How she manages to maintain some contact with her father despite how much he hurt her. We do what we must to find mental and physical safety but how much we can crave love from our parents even if we fear them. It's a constant balancing act and so emotionally exhausting.

I don't know very much about psychiatry and psychology so this aspect of the memoir was a bit over my head but I still followed along. She made it pretty easy for non-experts to understand the different kinds of treatment she sought. This memoir is so sad, reading about Foo encountering so many hurdles and struggling to find the light at the end of the tunnel. Knowing that she was well enough to write this memoir, reflecting on her life does little to lessen the second-hand blow of her life story to the reader. It's heavy heavy heavy.

I wish her the best in continuing to heal and understand herself before and after the trauma.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Emotional abuse, Fatphobia, Gun violence, Medical content, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Abandonment, Bullying, Medical trauma, Toxic relationship, Physical abuse, Racism, Suicidal thoughts, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, and Gaslighting

Moderate: Cursing, Grief, Self harm, Hate crime, Ableism, Alcohol, Suicide attempt, and Alcoholism

Minor: Body shaming, War, Incest, and Infertility

negative self-talk, bad therapy experiences, victim blaming.

lilcoppertop's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful informative reflective sad fast-paced

5.0

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Dysphoria, Grief, Alcoholism, Drug use, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Gaslighting, Mental illness, Abandonment, Addiction, Emotional abuse, Genocide, Suicidal thoughts, Child abuse, Eating disorder, Racism, Toxic relationship, Ableism, Alcohol, Injury/Injury detail, Self harm, Bullying, Panic attacks/disorders, Domestic abuse, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Suicide attempt, and Violence